Posted on 07/01/2002 4:32:21 AM PDT by SauronOfMordor
©Fred Reed 2002More Fred Columns
|
I would call that cynical.
are like stars, they come out at night.
Cynical?
Does this sound cynical to you?
Soon you will be a balding sofa ornament and she will look like a fireplug with cellulite.
Well... OK.
But hilarious nonetheless.
I wonder how he heard about my ex?
Part of the problem (which I see with my divorced friends with kids) is that the judicial system allows the woman to decide that it's more profitable to divorce and get a new boyfriend, and live off the incomes of the old hubbie and new guy
In days where it was harder to force the ex-hubbie to pay child support if he didn't feel like it, it was a strong motivator for the wife to keep on the ex-hubbie's good side and ensure he got all his visitation so he would WANT to keep up his child support.
Not just in moments of unguided passion, but all the time!
No such thing as gender equality in family law. Reed isn't half as cynical as yours truly. 'Pod
LOL!
You ain't no fireplug with cellulite, and I'm not thinking you ever will be!
But you've got that something that will get me through the next thirty years.
Signed, your balding sofa ornament.
By Gary McAuley
A six-pack a day more than doubles a single person's risk of proposing marriage, according to perhaps the most rigorous study yet to focus on the possible link between alcohol and marriage.
Some doctors have long suspected a connection and urged single people to avoid alcohol, but even this study will probably not end the doubt among many doctors.
Unlike most past research, this latest study looked at single people who are lonely, when most marriages happen. It also tried to account for risk from genetic defects, such as parents who were still married.
A research team in Sweden and the United States, which was to publish its findings in Thursday's issue of The New England Journal of Medicine, found the equivalent of one to three beers increase the risk of marriage proposals by 30 percent while three to five beers raise the risk by 40 percent
A six-pack a day yields more than double the risk.
"I can attest to that," stated local single man Matt Donahue, when asked to comment on the findings. "I was out at a bar drinking with my girl-friend Jennifer. Now Jennifer don't put out or nothin', and I was sittin' there drinkin', see? And I was lookin' at her and she was beginning to look like an Angel out of Heaven and I was wonderin' what color underwear she might have on or if she's even wearin' any underwear when suddenly I'm poppin' the question. I mean, I'm poppin' the question, you know? And she smiles and says yes and suddenly strangers around the bar are comin' over congratulating us. Jesus."
The study involved 562 lonely single people. Because the single people were Swedish, they often drank stronger beverages than the Americans. Swedish Alcohol carries about 12 percent alcohol by weight, compared with typical 8-10 percent in American beverages. Sake was not used in this experiment. And further studies may detail whether different types of alcoholic beverages provide statistically different levels of marriage proposals and acceptance.
Nathan Short, President of the National Alcohol Association trade group, disputed these findings. "There is no cause and effect relationship between someone drinking and proposing marriage", he argued. We have our own findings which detail no such comparison and for Researchers to hand out this unfounded assessment is very near slander." Nathan Short went on to emphasize that the NAA believes when marriage proposals are entertained, it should be done "when sober." Nathan Short was then asked if he was sober when he proposed to his wife, and Mr. Short issued a terse 'no comment.'
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.