[Mr_Magoo]

I just received this from my broker. I normally don't pass stock tips on, but I thought this exception would be OK. If you hold any of the following stocks, you may want to review:

American Can
Interstate Water
National Gas
Northern Tissue

Due to the uncertain market conditions, at this present time, we advise you to sit tight on your American Can, hold your Water, and let go of your Gas. You may be interested to know that Northern Tissue touched a new bottom today, and millions were wiped clean.

[tomkow6]

Four expectant fathers were in a Minneapolis
hospital waiting room, while their wives
were in labour.

The nurse arrived and announced to the first
man, "Congratulations sir, you're the father
of twins."

"What a coincidence!" the man said with some
obvious pride. "I work for the Minnesota
Twins baseball team."

The nurse returned in a little while and
turned to the second man, "You, sir, are the
father of triplets."

"Wow, that's really an incredible coincidence"
he answered. "I work for the 3M Corporation.
My buddies at work will never let me live
this one down."

An hour later, while the other two men were
passing cigars around, the nurse came back.
This time, she turned to the third man, who
had been quiet in the corner. She announced
that his wife had just given birth to
quadruplets. Stunned, he barely could reply.

"Don't tell me another coincidence?" asked
the nurse.

After finally regaining his composure, he
said "I don't believe it, I work for the
Four Seasons Hotel."

After hearing this, everybody's attention
turned to the fourth guy, who had just
fainted, flat out on the floor. The nurse
rushed to his side and, after some time, he
slowly gained back his consciousness.

When he was finally able to speak, everyone
could hear him whispering repeatedly the
same phrase over and over again.

"I should have never taken that job at 7-Up.
I should have never taken that job at 7-Up.
I should have never taken that job at 7-Up..."