[kneezles]

Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple 
of bottles of Bud. The passenger, Bubba, said, "Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, 
it's a po-lice roadblock! We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here 
beers!!" 

"Don't worry, Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' 
these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the 
bottles under the seat." 

"What fer?" asked Bubba. 

"Just let me do the talkin', OK?" said Earl. 

Well, they finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat, and 
each put a label on their forehead.When they reached the roadblock, the 
sheriff said, "You boys been drinkin'?" 

... "No sir," Earl said. "We're on the patch."

[tomkow6]

After discovering her young daughter playing
doctor with the neighbours boy, the angry
mother grabbed the boy by the ear and dragged
him to his house and confronted his mother.

"It's only natural for young boys and girls
to explore their sexuality by playing doctor
at their age." the neighbour said.

"Sexuality my ass!" The mother yelled. "He
took out her appendix!"