Actually, I agree. A child with his dad is more likely to be better supported, particularly if the dad remarries or has grandma on his side. Also, a child with her dad is less likely to be abused by Mommy's New Friend. What of it? It isn't happening anytime soon. And many men don't want their kids.
re: What grinds my gears is that the money had to be sent to a cheating, lying slut who didn't have to account for how the money was spent.)))
Someone close to me, someone I'm very fond of, is having this very thing happening to him...and the laws in his state supposedly allow the kids some say in where they go on divorce when they're over 13. They want to be with him, but the judge wouldn't even let the kids speak. Judge just threatened this guy with huge costs if he pursued his case. He's still pursuing it, and saving every dime to pay both his and HER lawyer in the oncoming battle.
Mostly he's afraid of her boyfriends and his daughters. But that's a separate issue from the support, which he's also been hit with and is enraged by. I don't feel too sorry for him there...a man must support his children, whether he likes the mother or not. The fact is, I'm afraid, he wasn't too very careful about who he impregnated. Most people around her knew her for what she was, and warned him, but he turned off his brain and let other things do his thinking. I guess he was foolish? We are all slaves to our foolishness, and he has to pay for his for a few years. Hopefully he will prevail in court.
He'll be better for his daughters than she, and she does not deserve the support. However, there is another rather unattractive issue around this thread. A man, shut out of his ex's bed, doesn't like to have to pay out money for another man's sex. This is some of the dynamic I hear going on, *not* thwarted fatherhood. He's paying for some other guy's pleasure, which is the authentic source of the rage.
It's all in the attitude, dude. I was delighted when my ex hooked up with a new beau. It improved her mood and attitude markedly. (And better him than me!!!!)