Alien Sex A Martian couple and an Earthling couple meet and are talking about all sorts of things. Finally, the subject of sex comes up. "Just how do you guys do it?" asks the Earthling. "Pretty much the way you do," responds the Martian. Discussion ensues and finally the couples decide to swap partners for the night and experience one another.
The female Earthling and the male Martian go off to a bedroom where the Martian strips. He's got only a teeny, weeny member--about half an inch long and just a quarter inch thick.
"I don't think this is going to work," says the woman. "Why?" he asks, "What's the matter?" "Well," she replies, "It's just not long enough to reach me!" "No problem," he says, and proceeds to slap his forehead with his palm. With each slap of his forehead, his member grows until it's quite impressively long. "Well," she says, "That's quite impressive, but it's still pretty narrow...." "No problem," he says, and starts pulling his ears. With each pull his member grows wider and wider until the entire measurement is extremely exciting to the woman. "Wow!" she exclaims as they fall into bed and make mad, passionate love.
The next day the couples rejoin their normal partners and go their separate ways. As they walk along, the Earth male asks, "Well, was it any good?" "I hate to say it," she says, "but it was pretty wonderful. How about you?" "It was OK," he replies, "but a little weird. The whole time she was slapping my forehead and pulling my ears."