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These moms and dads "decorate their children's rooms in stimulating colors, buy educational toys, forgo playpens and give baby massages. They space their children according to the best advice of child- development experts. ... They sacrifice personal time, friendships and their own interests - sometimes even their sex lives. They let their kids interrupt them and drop everything to take advantage of every teaching moment. And perhaps most important, they take every opportunity to build up their children's self-esteem."

I am frightened to say this is how we are raising our children, but they don't seem (at 8 and 4) to be hurting too badly.

Mr. Eight can amuse himself for hours on end reading or building legos, and Ms. Four is already selecting her wardrobe with no input from us superfluous adults.

To ward off the perpetually full nest possibility, Mr. Eight has already been told he is LEAVING TOWN for college. He uses Harry Potter's Hogwarts as a mental model for his future away from us, and he seems quite content.

They sacrifice personal time, friendships and their own interests - sometimes even their sex lives.

I'm willing to sacrifice the former and my wife is willing to sacrifice the latter so I guess we must be bad parents too. We both try to use the parental quotes we grew up with. We use the "grown-up zone" a few minutes after I get home from work but we have never used the"'Don't bother me unless you're bleeding'. My personal favorites are "If I have to stop this car..." and "I don't care which one started it, if I punish the both of you I am sure to get the guilty party".

Two years ago when my daughter was five, my wife said "When you move out to go to college..." and my daughter burst into tears. After we consoled her we had a good laugh about it.