A great battle was fought at Gettysburg on the first, second and third days of July. I remained in our house alone (my family having gone on a visit to Columbia) during the first day's fight. Shells shrieked over the town for more than three hours and then, on the retreat of our men, they fell around the house in the yard.
During the early part of the day, I watched the movements of the armies from the steeple of the church, which stands next (to) the parsonage-saw the wounded and dying constantly brought in. In the afternoon our church was taken for a hospital, but before night the wounded had to removed, because the enemy outnumbering the union forces three to one on this first day's fight, drove our men into the town and through it. Night closed in leaving us within the enemies lines.
The streets were strewn with dead men and horses and littered with the debris of the battle. Some of my neighbors were roughly treated during the night-and some of the stragglers of the rebel army threatened to strip us of shoes and other garments.
On this account I left with a number of other citizens on the morning of the second day's fight. We proceeded north as far as Petersburg (14 miles) meeting the entire Cavalry of the enemy at various points of the road. I remained at Petersburg with my early friend and college chum, Rev. P. Raby, until Sabbath. During these dreary days we heard the cannonading very distinctly, but could get not news of battle.
When at length the welcome news came that the enemy were retreating Bro. Raby and myself went on foot to Gettysburg, taking with us such things as we could carry to assist the wounded soliders. It was nearing night of the Sabbath when we reached the village.
On Monday morning we proved to the battled fileld and saw sights which I cannot describe. Dead men and horses already far gone into decay, muskets, knapsacks, broken caissons, and cannon, etc etc. lay everywhere. During these days the entire stock of provision in the whole county for many miles, was exhausted. The railroad was broked up and bridges burned, so that we were cut off from any immediate supply.
Immediately upon the cessation of hostilities our friends from a distance came in with provisions to relieve immediate necessities. Otherwise I cannot see how it would have been possible to avoid great suffering.
My church was occupied for a hospital and it was several weeks before it could be used for religious services. For many weeks after the battle there was a stench filling the air, which was almost unendurable. This caused a great deal of sickness. I was taken down with fever and was unable to perform ministerial duties for about two months. Two of my children had severe illnesses. We were fortunate to escape with very little loss of property during the battle. Some of my neighbors had their houses thoroughly plundered. Quite a number of houses and barns in the county neaer the village were burned. Several members of my church lost nearly all their property and one member, a young lady Miss Jennie Wade, was shot and killed during the battle . . .full diary text
Sullivan Ballou's letter to his beloved wife Sarah, July 14,1861 Camp Clark, Washington DC, as it was read on the PBS series The CIVIL WAR by Ken Burns series....
Dear Sarah:The indications are very strong that we shall move in a few days - perhaps tomorrow. And lest I should not be able to write you again I feel impelled to write a few lines that may fall under your eye when I am no more.
I have no misgivings about, or lack of confidence in the cause in which I am engaged, and my courage does not halt or falter. I know how American Civilization now leans upon the triumph of the government and how great a debt we owe to those who went before us through the blood and suffering of the Revolution. And I am willing - perfectly willing - to lay down all my joys in this life, to help maintain this government, and to pay that debt.
Sarah, my love for you is deathless, it seems to bind me with mighty cables that nothing but omnipotence can break; and yet my love of Country comes over me like a strong wind and bears me irresistibly with all those chains to the battlefield. The memory of all the blissful moments I have enjoyed with you come crowding over me, and I feel most deeply grateful to God and you, that I have enjoyed them for so long. And how hard it is for me to give them up and burn to ashes the hopes and future years, when, God willing, we might still have lived and loved together, and see our boys grown up to honorable manhood around us.
If I do not return, my dear Sarah, never forget how much I loved you, nor that when my last breath escapes me on the battle field, it will whisper your name...
Forgive my many faults, and the many pains I have caused you. How thoughtless, how foolish I have sometimes been!...
But, 0 Sarah, if the dead can come back to this earth and flit unseen around those they love, I shall always be with you, in the brightest day and in the darkest night... always, always. And when the soft breeze fans your cheek, it shall be my breath, or the cool air your throbbing temple, it shall be my spirit passing by.
Sarah do not mourn me dead; think I am gone and wait for me, for we shall meet again...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sullivan Ballou was killed a week later at the 1st Battle of Bull Run.