In the first transgression you mention, consider yourself lucky, I guess.
At St. John the Evangelist, on Humboldt, they allowed a female pastoral associate, dressed up like the protestant Rev. Schuller, to deliver the homily. I think she's even a step below Deacon, though I'm not sure, as I don't know what powers the title pastoral associate confers. I was overcome by a desire to bolt, but convinced myself I should't make a scene, and that I was probably over-reacting.
In practice, I'm only opposed to a Deacon delivering the Homily when the Deacon is an idiot. But that would hold true for Priests as well, so there's nothing to be done.
The rock and roll thing speaks for itself.
In case you're interested and ever in town again, I have found a good Church downtown, Our Lady of Victory/St. Joseph's Church on Pleasant. Mass is at 4:30 on Saturday in anticipation of the Sunday Mass, and at 10:00 a.m. and 7:30 p.m. on Sunday. It's very near the arena. And the Priest is a rock solid Priest.
i prefer tridentine if at all possible, but a conservative novus ordo will do. thanks albiongirl for the suggestions, we will definitely look into that the next time. my husband is an SU grad and we were up there for a basketball game. the priest was african and the congregation greeted him with Jamba, Father. the deacon's sermon was appalling because it was not based on any sort of biblical teaching, but was rather his life experience, something about some girl he dated in college, who jilted him and how he reacted etc. Licit or not, rogator,to have a layperson presuming to TEACH/preach to peers, based on no scripture, no catholic theology or possessing of no particular training, WHAT is the point of that?