The Resume Of Jesus Christ

Second Nazareth ^ | 2005 (?) | (Unknown)

[ConservativeStLouisGuy]

I just received this NEAT email from my wife -- hadn't seen it posted anywhere on Free Republic....

 

The Resume of Jesus Christ

Address: Ephesians 1:20
Phone: Romans 10:13
Website: The Bible. Keywords: Christ, Lord, Savior and Jesus

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Hello. My name is Jesus -The Christ. Many call me Lord! I've sent you my resume because I'm seeking the top management position in your heart.  Please consider my accomplishments as set forth in my resume.

Qualifications

• I founded the earth and established the heavens, (See Proverbs 3:19)
• I formed man from the dust of the ground, (See Genesis 2:7)
• I breathed into man the breath of life, (See Genesis 2:7)
• I redeemed man from the curse of the law, (See Galatians 3:13)
• The blessings of the Abrahamic Covenant comes upon your life through me, (See Galatians 3:14)

Occupational Background

• I've only had one employer, (See Luke 2:49).  
• I've never been tardy, absent, disobedient, slothful or disrespectful.
• My employer has nothing but rave reviews for me, (See Matthew 3:15-17)

Skills Work Experiences

• Some of my skills and work experiences include: empowering the poor to be poor no more, healing the brokenhearted, setting the captives free, healing the sick, restoring sight to the blind and setting at liberty them that are bruised, (See Luke 4:18).
• I am a Wonderful Counselor, (See Isaiah 9:6). People who listen to me shall dwell safely and shall not fear evil, (See Proverbs 1:33).
• Most importantly, I have the authority, ability and power to cleanse you of your sins, (See I John 1:7-9)

Educational Background

• I encompass the entire breadth and length of knowledge, wisdom and understanding, (See Proverbs 2:6).
• In me are hid all of the treasures of wisdom and knowledge, (See Colossians 2:3).
• My Word is so powerful; it has been described as being a lamp unto your feet and a lamp unto your path, (See Psalms 119:105).
• I can even tell you all of the secrets of your heart, (See Psalms 44:21).

Major Accomplishments

• I was an active participant in the greatest Summit Meeting of all times, (See Genesis 1:26).
• I laid down my life so that you may live, (See II Corinthians 5:15).
• I defeated the archenemy of God and mankind and made a show of them openly, (See Colossians 2:15).
• I've miraculously fed the poor, healed the sick and raised the dead!
• There are many more major accomplishments, too many to mention here. You can read them on my website, which is located at: www dot - the BIBLE. You don't need an Internet connection or computer to access my website.

References

• Believers and followers worldwide will testify to my divine healings, salvation, deliverance, miracles, restoration and supernatural guidance

In Summation

Now that you've read my resume, I'm confident that I'm the only candidate uniquely qualified to fill this vital position in your heart. In summation, I will properly direct your paths, (See Proverbs 3:5-6), and lead you into everlasting life, (See John 6:47). When can I start? Time is of the essence, (See Hebrews 3:15).

[ConservativeStLouisGuy]

Enjoy.....

[Thinkin' Gal]

The Resume of Jesus Christ

Is he out of work? Is he for hire? Looks like Jesus is trying to sell himself. Dorky at best; blasphemous at worst. Either way, it does pretty much look like the Jesus of the modern church.

[Da Bulls]

If it works God's will in the life of even one person, then all I can say is Praise the Lord!

[the-ironically-named-proverbs2]

It's the fuzzy-wuzzy, warm, cuddly kitten Jesus saying "please,please,please have a relationship with me!".

Too bad though, the Laodicean church will probably find a better candidate to fill the position. I hear some have even called him and "angel of light"!

[ConservativeStLouisGuy]

Is he out of work? Is he for hire?

Hmmmm....interesting questions....

I'm supposin' that the Jesus spoken of in the article I posted is sort of akin to the down-and-out street person one might see in most large cities, but instead of saying he'll "work for food" he's saying something like "I'll work for souls"....

[ConservativeStLouisGuy]

Instead of the devil in the above picture just think of Jesus holding the sign, saying the same thing....I admit the article does tend to portray Jesus in a rather "less-than-Godly" light, but, hey, let's save the flaming for the Dims and the Left, okay? :-)

[ET(end tyranny)]

The Bible. Keywords: Christ, Lord, Savior and Jesus

(JPS-Divine Name Restored)
Psalms 106:21 They forgot God their saviour, who had done great things in Egypt

Isaiah 43:3 For I am YHWH thy God, The Holy One of Israel, thy Saviour; I have given Egypt as thy ransom, Ethiopia and Seba for thee.

Isaiah 43:11 I, even I, am YHWH; and beside Me there is no saviour.

Isaiah 45:20 Assemble yourselves and come, draw near together, ye that are escaped of the nations; they have no knowledge that carry the wood of their graven image, and pray unto a god that cannot save.
21 Declare ye, and bring them near, yea, let them take counsel together: Who hath announced this from ancient time, and declared it of old? Have not I YHWH? And there is no God else beside Me, a just God and a Saviour; there is none beside Me.
22 Look unto Me, and be ye saved, all the ends of the earth; for I am God, and there is none else.
23 By Myself have I sworn, the word is gone forth from My mouth in righteousness, and shall not come back, that unto Me every knee shall bow, every tongue shall swear.
24 Only in YHWH, shall one say of Me, is victory and strength; even to Him shall men come in confusion, all they that were incensed against Him.
25 In YHWH shall all the seed of Israel be justified, and shall glory.

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Hello. My name is Jesus -The Christ. Many call me Lord! I've sent you my resume because I'm seeking the top management position in your heart.  Please consider my accomplishments as set forth in my resume.

The top position has been filled by YHWH our Father and Creator.  Not sure why some people think the created son wants to usurp YHWH's position in people's hearts.  The Father is greater than the son.

John 13:16 Verily, verily, I say unto you, The servant is not greater than his lord; neither he that is sent greater than he that sent him.

John 14:28 Ye have heard how I said unto you, I go away, and come [again] unto you. If ye loved me, ye would rejoice, because I said, I go unto the Father: for my Father is greater than I.

[ConservativeStLouisGuy]

Not sure why some people think the created son wants to usurp YHWH's position in people's hearts.

Nothing to do with "usurping" going on here....being Catholic we believe in the Doctrine of the Blessed Trinity -- "Three In One"....(geeesh!)

I don't mind a tempered discussion about this posting, but for gosh sakes, can't we just agree that Jesus (God, Son, Holy Spirit) should occupy the place of prominance in a person's heart as opposed to, say, Satan? :-)

[ET(end tyranny)]

There is only ONE, not two or three. Just YHWH the ONE and ONLY.

[ET(end tyranny)]

Isaiah 42
8 I am YHWH, that is My name; and My glory will I not give to another, neither My praise to graven images.

See, His name isn't LORD, Lord. Lord is a title. It was given to both YHWH and to Jesus and all it does is confuse people into thinking that YHWH and Jesus are the same when they aren't.

G-d tells us that His name is YHWH. It's very unfortunate that 'YHWH' has been removed from most bibles, while the names of pagan gods like Moloch were left in.

[ConservativeStLouisGuy]

You know, I went to a (private) Catholic school from 1st through 12th grade -- I happen to KNOW that God the Father is at the top of the totem pole.... :-)

[ET(end tyranny)]

Good, then you know better than to pray to anyone other than YHWH. ;)

[ConservativeStLouisGuy]

Good, then you know better than to pray to anyone other than YHWH. ;)

HOLD ON!!

Who said I was praying to anyone else other than God Himself?.... :-)

[ET(end tyranny)]

No one. I made a declarative statement that since you recognize that YHWH/G-d is at the top of the totem pole, that you knew that we aren't supposed to pray to anyone other than YHWH/G-d. I didn't say that you were praying to anyone else like Saints or Jesus.

[Right in Wisconsin]

For a person titled "end tyranny", you forcing your religion on others who may not hold the same beliefs is a form of tyranny. The Catholic faith believes that there is only one God who sent his only son. Jesus does state somewhere in John that "My father and I are one". It is also tyrannical to be condescending and unloving. Prayer is a personal thing, in fact, as a Catholic I pray to several Saints and the Blessed Mother. Do not my prayers all go to the same one and only God? God knows my heart, that's all that should matter. Judge not lest you be judged!!!

[theFIRMbss]

>Nothing to do with "usurping" going on here....being Catholic we believe in the Doctrine of the Blessed Trinity -- "Three In One"....(geeesh!)

"Professor Mark Miravalle of Franciscan University in Steubenville, OH, initiated a formal petition drive in 1993 during a Marian conference at that university. It asks the Pope to make infallible statement that would officially elevate Mary, the mother of Jesus, to the status of co-redeemer. More than six million signatures from 148 countries have reached the Vatican as of the end of the year 2000, asking that Pope John Paul II infallibly declare a new dogma: "That the Virgin Mary is a co-redeemer with Jesus and co-operates fully with her son in the redemption of humanity." If this were done, "she would be a vastly more powerful figure, something close to the fourth member of the Holy Trinity and the primary female face through which Christians experience the divine."

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[ConservativeStLouisGuy]

I hadn't heard about that movement to elevate Mary to that status -- although I'm sure that even IF it was considered that it would undergo a GREAT amount of scrutiny in the Vatican before any action was taken. Remember, it wasn't until the 1950's that the Doctrine of the Assumption of Mary was proclaimed!

[ConservativeStLouisGuy]

No one. I made a declarative statement that since you recognize that YHWH/G-d is at the top of the totem pole, that you knew that we aren't supposed to pray to anyone other than YHWH/G-d. I didn't say that you were praying to anyone else like Saints or Jesus.

Okie-doke -- by the way, we Catholics don't "pray to" Saints -- we "intercede" through them....the same was one wouldn't pray to their deceased relatives....they "intercede" through them....

[ConservativeStLouisGuy]

[ConservativeStLouisGuy]

Thanks for bucking me up, friend!

I was really just hoping for a nice, innocent post on this Religion Forum -- not that it would devolve into the whole "God, Son, Holy Spirit" angle....don't get me wrong -- open discussion IS GOOD, but (geez!) like I said in an earlier posting on this thread, let us PLEASE save the flaming for the Dims and Left, kaput? :-)