Replies

No, you mistook what I said. It might not have been clear enough, but nevertheless you lifted it out of the middle of a sentence and gave it meaning clearly not intended. I’m writing on a little phone with an external keyboard, and it isn’t easy because I type fast enough that the keyboard often overwhelms the phone and shuts it down. I have to be careful to save often. So I’m a little distracted while writing and didn’t make what I meant as clear I’d meant to. I am not sure all the Catholics here would even answer your question in exactly the same way, but you didn’t ask them, but some evangelicals, so we won’t know now.

And I worked quite a bit to address the issues brought up as completely as possible, but as is all too common here, it seems you will not reply to what I wrote, but only take one small thing, part of a sentence, out of context. As I’ve mentioned, I’ve had no prejudice for or against any Christian belief, doctrine or church. I have only wanted, and still want, the Lord to reveal whatever the truth is to me. That is the only thing that makes sense.

Years ago I lived as a lesbian, in 2000 I voted for Al Gore and Hillary Clinton for Senator, and I considered registering to be a Communist sometime after 9/11. But I believed that I was a sinner, and Jesus was and is God’s Son and the Savior of the world, and from that belief God has revealed many things to be as I didn’t understand them to be. If the Catholic Church had the best fruits and the most biblical doctrines, then I’d join it. And knowing how I didn’t understand things in the past, I want to let the Lord lead me and possibly change how I understand them. So I look without prejudice at the Catholic Church even today, and would allow the Lord to change my mind about it, but again I see all the ways in which it has moved from the faith revealed in the Bible. As an unmarried Christian woman who, if I were a man, could become a pastor now but can’t since I’m a woman, becoming a Catholic nun would actually in a way make sense to me, especially since I have a college education from a good university, but primarily because I don’t swear or laugh at dirty videos, I’m “stuck” right now - or appear to be - in an entry level fast food job while in my 40’s. But I would be miserable being a Catholic, and just could never do it. Listening to the Rosary pains and disturbs me, so I couldn’t pray it, just for starters. Being a Catholic and a nun, then, is out of the question.

But I know I am also not “stuck” in my job, except that the Lord has “stuck” me where I am as part of His plan. I see Him working in my current situation in all sorts of ways. When I look at things in the superficial, worldly way, I can forget that, but when I remind myself of the truth, then I see that the faith the Lord has given me sets me apart from those where I work who are without it, and that it’s a witness to them. These people can’t deny that I’m doing this job that they feel ashamed of and frustrated with, and doing it with peace, patience and joy, even while being open to “doing more,” in a worldly sense, if the Lord has me to. But whatever the circumstances, I know I have the only necessary thing, a relationship with the Savior, Jesus. And I am fulfilled to see the Lord acting in me, and through me.