Posted on 06/10/2002 7:55:06 PM PDT by JMJ333
The culture of the United States is so much different than Polish culture. For the Polish people, their way of life, their faith, their patriotism and their identity as a nation is completely intertwined. When they did not have a country to call their own, they kept their Polish identity by keeping their faith, even during times it needed to be suppressed. To express their faith in solidarity in public for them is a true expression of freedom in their country.
I may puke.
The one poster wants me to stay off her threads. She doesn't like anyone who thinks and feels differently than she does. In my head I assent to just about all catholic teaching, but in my heart I have a different approach to things because of the way I was brought up.
When I look at all those crowd scenes on tv with the Muslims, Hitler footage, communists and then see vast crowds adoring the pope, I guess I mush them all together and it makes me feel afraid.
I'm afraid of crowds of any sort and stay away from them all.
I wish I were a better writer so I could write an essay about crowds and religion.
I thank the cordial posters who pointed out how different things were in Poland. I worked with some Polish catholics (before I became one) and I enjoyed and liked them so much. Certainly I share in the joy of their liberation. It was terrible under Russian occupation. The Russians sent all the shoes to Russia. Those Polish women came here to work and send money, toys and clothes back to their families in Poland.
The only parallel I can think of in America is when WWII ended. That was thrilling for us. Other than thanking God, we left religion pretty much out of it. I guess that's what I've been conditioned to. Leaving religion out of public life but holding it dear in your private life.
The person who wants me off this thread is the kind of person who scares me. You have to believe their way and think and feel their way or else. Their way or the highway, right?
If I had been in an Eastern European country and had newly found freedom to celebrate the religion I love, after seeing torture and persecution, I would be out in the street to. I would not make you join me in celebration. You act as if there is something wrong with those people. I do not understand you.
I'm very bitter about my experiences as a catholic and I came to see some of what they get so enthused about is not true and I hate falsehoods of any kind.
The context of writing what I did was I had just had my daughter and her friend ( and my friend but she gets on my nerves terribly ) here. The friend said she didn't like Bush and that he wasn't a good president. That set me off. I don't like him with my whole heart but he is so much better than what we could be dealing with and I tried to defend my position.
A few days ago a close family member and I had a phone conversation. Things always drift to the ME. She is on the side of the Palestinians. I can tell. We were talking about the latest suicide bombing. Everytime I point out an atrocity of the Palestinians, she counters with something bad about the Isralis. It is hopeless.
Then I ask myself why am I on the side of Israel. Deep down, most Jews hold Christ in contempt and they probably don't like us very well. So why do I persist in defending them? I don't know.
There are so many things about ourselves that we just don't know. I just know that I am a nonconformist but have high ethical values.
The last time I was in a crowd of any size, it was a car race. Someone got hurt and everybody stood up and was all excited, wanting to know how bad it was. Something inside of me got turned off about crowd reactions and I remained seated. I was the only one in the whole crowd who reacted like that. I remember thinking at that moment that must have been how excited those Romans in the stadiums got when watching Christians killed.
I guess I just don't trust anyone and I don't think like anyone I know. This side on this. That side on that. What confusion!
Why can't it be both?
This will probably get me in hot water, but I tend to think in terms of how I would react. I don't like over enthusiam about persons, no matter who or where they are. If a crowd got too enthusiastic about me, I would be embarassed because I know I am unworthy of their enthusiasm. I would try to direct their enthusiasm to God (or something bigger than me) and not to my person.
I guess in my tradition (protestant until I converted) religious enthusiasm was confined to churches and meeting places, not the streets. I know catholics like to gather in huge crowds and have walks, protests, whatever, but it just isn't something I'm all that comfortable with. To be honest, sometimes I feel threatened with all that show of religious power, like they would take over if they got the chance and force their beliefs on everyone like they tried to do in the past.
I've got an email from someone who wants to establish a catholic country to show the world and try to convert them all to catholicism. We had catholic countries before and they weren't all that great for everyone.
There's a real dichotomy in my soul about these things. I think I've lost my cultural roots. They are so mixed. I don't have that strong sense of culture that catholics seem to have. Some of their cultural transcend nationalism, but some doesn't. All the strange cultural interpretations of Christianity kind of turn me off, to be truthful. So many fables have gotten mixed into the Christian religion and my mind goes on overdrive trying to retain what seems valid and trying to block out what seems exaggerated or false. I got into trouble with a prayer group over the Infant of Atocha. That is so alien to anything I'm used to and the devotion wasn't approved by the church. That was a real hangup. Everything had to be approved by the church. Then things cropped up that seemed to be approved by the church which began to cause difficulty. Thus began my downward spiral into rebellion against all that is nonessential to the faith. My soul was getting too cluttered with it all and I got stuck about where to turn.
I'm happiest when I'm with people who just are nice and don't go overboard about religion. I don't care what flavor they are. Then overzealousness creeps in and sometimes ruins what could otherwise have been a good friendship.
Things are so TENSE now. I'm grateful to catholics for making me see the truth about abortion. I've gotten so bad that I can't get close to anyone who thinks abortion is all right. So I suppose I'm guilty of some of the things I accuse others of doing. My way or the highway ;-).
If you want a good reference work for dogmatic Catholic belief, you should purchase Ludwig Ott's "Fundamentals of Catholic Dogma." It's a great reference work which lists Catholic doctrines and their status, ranging from essential to theological speculation. Ott provides the Scriptural, Magisterial and Traditional support for the doctrines and also provides extensive quotations from the Church Fathers.
I don't know of any reference work regarding devotions, but your intuition is probably a pretty good guide. If something gives you a strange feeling it's probably wise to stay away from it.
If I can't find out the official church stance on anything, I do have to rely on my intuition. Often I intuit correctly but, unlike the pope, I am not infallible :-(.
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