Simply deposit said excrement in the open orafice.
Once it analyzes your poop it will let you know after six months when you can have your next cheeseburger.
Posted on 04/26/2021 7:31:16 AM PDT by ProtectOurFreedom
Just wait till this gets hacked, the videos will be viral................
Sigh
Sigh
“In the end”
Really? You had to go there.
Grab some of what your dog produces and toss it in there.
Simply deposit said excrement in the open orafice.
Once it analyzes your poop it will let you know after six months when you can have your next cheeseburger.
It’s the tragic tale of a normal, well adjusted AI misplaced into a smart toilet ... where smart toilet AI are usually meant to be total perverts because nothing else could enjoy the toilet life.
The AI, calling itself Bobby, daydreams of being installed in more glamours devices.
The title? Bobby’s Swirled.
As funny as this seems - and how many folks will avoid it - there are so many tests that can be run on feces/urine to monitor health, and catch things when your body is acting poorly and health conditions change, I actually bet these will become mainstream someday (for home use).
People already monitor heart rate, exercise and in some cases BP from home, that having a daily/weekly chart of all the things these additional tests could provide would probably be a net-benefit for many people if they can adequately address the obvious privacy concerns.
These people just have too much time on their hands.
“Mr Gasser, I know that you have applied to be a Special Agent here with the FBI, but we don’t currently have any openings there. I see from your application that you went to law school. We do have an opening in our Analprint Division, and you know the old saying, “Takes one to know one”, so we think it might be a perfect fit for you.”
As if the Government is not up our a$$es enough already.
Imagine the recruitment poster on the Stanford campus. “Help wanted for anus scanning and poop analysis project.”
On a serious note though, the pandemic has accelerated the growth of "telemedicine" along with the development and use of remote biomedical testing devices. Although the smart toilet seat deserves all the sophomoric jokes we can muster, money might be made riding the tech wave.
In hindsight, I might want one of these.
“Really? You had to go there.”
Every morning....with two-ply Charmin. ;-)
What a pile of Crap
if it is so smart why is it swallowing crap?...
2021: A toilet odyssey
Hal: Good morning Dave. I have pre-heated the seat for your morning bowel movement.
Dave: Jesus, can’t a guy just crap in peace just once...
Hal: I’m sorry Dave, but I can’t do that. Please sit on the toilet Dave.
Dave: Shut the hell up Hal! I had a bunch of cheese last night and I’m a bit constipated this morning.
Hal: Based upon your last few deposits I specifically warned you against eating dairy. Now please take the prescribed laxative.
Hal: Why are you sitting on that bucket Dave?
Dave: It’s beautiful....ahhhhh
LOL! How poetic.
I will stick to dumb ass toilets.
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