Posted on 11/21/2009 6:29:07 AM PST by RayChuang88
I notice he addressed his rant to all his employees. While I'm sure some are harder working than others, I rather doubt every one of them deserved to be addressed this way. And if they are all that defiant / lazy, it speaks more to his hiring and management skills than their abilities.
Ah, but then that’s the beauty of being a skilled professional, when they need YOU more than you need THEM...
That's an end-justifies-the-means argument and it's absolutely wrong. You were wrong and bone-headed for getting between the two. You and your 'deterrence' stance makes you sound pretty young, inexperienced and unprofessional. Maybe you're not, but that's the way you come across. A word of advice; the next time something like this happens in her workplace, let her handle it. First, it shows respect for her person, her ability and her professionalism. Second, it prevents one bad scene from escalating into something way beyond the need. Third, someday, somewhere, you'll step in and the situation will turn on you - and your wife - in ways you never want to incur. Then, who's fault will it be?
There's more to life than confronting every real or imagined slight that occurs. Realizing that is part of the process of becoming a mature, respected member of society.
I’ve never been exposed to such intrusions coming from a business, but appreciate some of the advice you give on handling such issues. Thanks, it’s food for thought. I especially like the idea of trading my email address for the boss’s phone number. Naturally, I’d give a bogus email address anyway, expecting the boss to do the same. But just the asking would leave its mark...
I had a Polish boss when I was a busboy, during my college years. A real genuine asswipe. He would scream at us and push people. Sorry, it is UNACCEPTABLE to hit or push employees. None. I still hate that insufferable jerk.
Terrible management!
Confrontations should always be one-on-one!
If you wouldn’t want your employee bad-mouthing you to all your potential customers when he walks out the door, don’t do the same to them.
“Realizing that is part of the process of becoming a mature, respected member of society.”
Wow, this is insufferable.
I personally side with him wrt to how someone would treat my wife. You want to chew her out, I’ll keep her at home. I love the lady, and I respect her time and talents tremendously. Have you seen what it does to people when they come home, when they work for someone who is a terrible boss? Sucks all the life out of them.
Normally I would agree with you and stay out of it, but some of the doctors and bosses... Honestly. If managers complain when times are good that they can’t hire good staff, they might want to look at their management techniques when times are bad.
Employees have long memories. You stick with them in the tough times and try to make it work, and they will go to bat for you. Dump them on the side of the road, they will remember that too.
What happens with anyone’s spouse on the job is between the spouse and the job. My wife spent many years seeing how interactions at my workplace affected me. Now it’s my turn to walk in her shoes. But the larger and more important truth in all this is that spousal intervention in the workplace is one big ‘NO NO’. It’s a career killer. You may not like how a boss (or an employee) treats your spouse. You may feel she’s wrongly treated, accused, manipulated. And, you may be right. But it’s not your place to become involved.
Someday, such intervention will come back to haunt you. Believe me, I’ve seen it happen. Once the spouse interferes, the employee loses all respect and consideration. You, the outsider, have just ruined their career. Think long and hard about that.
And that’s the insufferable part of this conversation. Being a loyal and loving spouse does not mean one has the right to interfere whenever a spouse is wronged. It means knowing when to stay out of the fray. And the workplace is one area where we aren’t welcomed.
A) Threaten to smash their face in--a misdemeanor.
or,
B) Smash their face in--a felony.
You have already admitted to committing A, the misdemeanor. My suggestion for anyone who did such a thing would be to seek immediate medical treatment for their apparent anger management issues.
The incident also exhibits cowardice. In your confrontation with the insulting party, you met him in secret--in a dark parking lot with no witnesses. Wouldn't a real man have been more public, unafraid of the consequences?
With respect to your participation in Free Republic, and assuming you are not a liberal troll, let me further suggest that you not post comments that give anti-conservative ammunition to the leftists. IMHO, your post leaves the impression that conservatives are hot-headed, violent nutjobs.
“What happens with anyone’s spouse on the job is between the spouse and the job.”
Right, so if her boss hits her I have no right to complain? I can understand your perspective, but I have seen some horrible bosses. You underestimate what folks can do to their employees. It’s my responsibility to love and care for her, and if I’m negligent in my responsibilities, then that is on me. No employer has the right to abuse anyone, least of all my spouse.
I have intervened in the past with a particularly egregarious employer, whom we ended up suing. No regrets. No job is worth abuse, and I’d rather be her husband and have her love than I care about what some scumbag boss thinks of her.
“Someday, such intervention will come back to haunt you.”
Pardon me sir, what business do you manage? I’m curious, because I’d like to avoid you and any business that you manage. I don’t like your attitude, and that you would terminate an employee who stands up to you, says it all for me.
“You, the outsider, have just ruined their career. Think long and hard about that.”
I’m her husband. Frankly an employer who thinks I am an ‘outsider’, has the wrong perspective. As far as I’m concerned I have an obligation to respect all of my employees. If a husband were to come in and speak with me, I would completely understand his concern, and I would hear him out. A spouse is never an outsider.
“And the workplace is one area where we aren’t welcomed.”
Employers have an obligation to respect their employees. If an employer fails then it’s part of my job description to go and speak with them. If I’m not satisfied, don’t be surprised if she finds another job.
I would rather she work in a job where she is respected and loved for her talents. The difference is night and day. Failing that, I’d have her at home. She is a blessing, and I want her to feel that every day.
“Anyone who has ever managed people in any business has sympathy for this guy.”
If this guy hasn’t been sued for creating a hostile workplace entironment yet, I hope he will be soon. He put his abuse in writing, no less.
You are absolutely clueless about employer/employee relations. Sorry, but you are. Let’s just leave it at that. I wish you luck. Some day you’re really gonna need it.
I’m not the only one obviously.
I can see why a boss would act the way you’ve suggested. I can understand that perfectly. I think it’s a terrible way to manage.
I’ll keep this private as to not bore the others:
<< My wife currently manages a retail store. I’m retired. There is no way I would ever get between her and her boss. >>
So you’re saying that if her boss sticks a finger in her chest and verbally assaults her in front of her coworkers, you would do NOTHING? How about if the guy who did that to her was a Muslim? Does that change anything?
No way I’d ever get between her and her employees. It just ain’t gonna happen. Having been a manager and knowing what’s entailed in the job, I expect her to carry her own weight. That’s what she’s paid the big bucks for (yeah, right, on the big bucks...).
<< That’s an end-justifies-the-means argument and it’s absolutely wrong. >>
I don’t agree. I think of it as more of a case of “you can argue method, but not results.” My methods may seem extreme to you, just as some people think that bombing Iraq and/or Afghanistan is an extreme position. Seems the same to me, except instead of a Muslim knocking down buildings, this one was trying to knock down my wife.
<< You were wrong and bone-headed for getting between the two. You and your ‘deterrence’ stance makes you sound pretty young, inexperienced and unprofessional. >>
I’m 58, I have a boatload of letters after my name, and I don’t care if the a-hole in question thinks of me as “unprofessional.” He got my message, and according to my wife, he’s been nice to her — and the other girls on her floor — ever since. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
<< Maybe you’re not, but that’s the way you come across. A word of advice; the next time something like this happens in her workplace, let her handle it. >>
“Um, honey...this guy just punched you in the face and tried to rape you, but I’m staying out of it. YOU handle it.”
Nah.
<< There’s more to life than confronting every real or imagined slight that occurs. Realizing that is part of the process of becoming a mature, respected member of society. >>
I understand what you’re saying, but if ignorance had wings, that paragraph would be an airport. Thanks for your input and be well.
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