Like seemingly everybody else in America, I have spent the vast majority of this brutally hot summer sitting underneath a fan in my air-conditioned apartment and clutching a sweaty can of White Claw spiked seltzer. Available in flavors like mango, black cherry, and grapefruit, these slim cans of refreshing sparkling water are spiked with a potent 5% alcohol content, and they’re the hottest cold drink in the country. This particular brand of spiked seltzer has inspired a truly unique devotion among its fans, dominating more than half of the rapidly growing “spiked seltzer” market, becoming the subject of countless memes,...