"Hillary's got this huge book, it's a memoir of her life and times at the White House. In the book, she says when Bill told her he was having an affair, she said 'I could hardly breathe, I was gulping for air.' No, I'm sorry, that's what Monica said." - David Letterman "Hillary Clinton's book hits the stores this Monday. Oh boy, it took her a long time to write it. But in her defense, every time she tried to use the desk, Bill was always using it for a date." - Jay Leno "Hillary Clinton's 506-page memoir comes out...