My friends and I are bracing for the annual rainbow onslaught poised to swamp families coast to coast this June. This year’s storm looks like a Category 5; it’s already blowing the doors off the nearby Target and wreaking havoc on the Bud Light warehouse. As bad as it is out in corporate land, it’s worse in the public schools, where it’s harder to see — almost like they’re trying to keep it secret! Many schools have even moved their pride events up to May so that no child is freed for summer vacation without being forced to take their...