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Humor (General/Chat)

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  • A reincarnated 'American Jesus' on Netflix? Build an ark. Quickly.

    07/22/2018 1:08:31 PM PDT · by BBell · 21 replies ^ | 7/20/18 | John Kass
    Netflix is developing a superhero show from a comic book, and America loves comic-book superheroes. This one is about an American superhero, for modern American tastes, and its bilingual so this epic superhero show will be inclusive, too. It involves a boy who suddenly and surprisingly discovers, in the way of all young superheroes, that he has amazing powers. And not just any superpowers. He has power over death itself.-snip- I dont know much about American Jesus. But if youve got plenty of lumber and nails and pitch, now might be a good time to start building an ark. We...
  • Some stuff for Saturday

    07/21/2018 5:46:00 AM PDT · by sodpoodle · 7 replies
    email from a friend | 7/21/2018 | unknown
    Astute Observations There are two sides to every divorce: Yours and dipsh*t's. The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content. I live in my own little world, but it's OK. Everyone knows me here. I saw a very large woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess" on it. I said, "Left Tackle? I don't do drugs. I find I get the same effect just by standing up really fast. I don't like political jokes. I've seen too many get elected. The most precious thing we have is life, yet it has absolutely no trade-in...
  • Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez makes another embarrassing gaffe and Bernie Sanders tweets it out

    07/20/2018 11:55:11 PM PDT · by BBell · 78 replies ^ | 7/20/18 | Carlos Garcia
    In an embarrassing gaffe that is being ridiculed by left and right, far left New York candidate Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez accidentally misidentified what party she is campaigning for. Heres what she said After her shocking upset in New Yorks 14th congressional district that unseated party boss Rep. Joe Crowley (D), Ocasio-Cortez has gone on to campaign for other similarly far left candidates wishing to bend the politics of the Democratic party. But on one campaign stop with Senator Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.), she appeared to forget, or simply misstate, what party she was campaigning for. And Bernie Sanders tweeted the video of...

    07/20/2018 10:27:03 AM PDT · by BBell · 76 replies ^ | 7/19/18 | Benny Johnson
    At a recent speech in South Africa, former President Barack Obama criticized wealth inequality, saying those who have more money should share their earnings with the less fortunate. Right now, Im actually surprised by how much money I got, Obama said of the more than $20 million he earned between 2005 and 2016. Obama then chided wealthy individuals for excess, saying, Theres only so much you can eat. Theres only so big a house you can have. Theres only so many nice trips you can take. I mean, its enough. Were going to have to worry about economics if we...
  • Today's Toons 7/20/18

    07/20/2018 1:20:14 AM PDT · by pookie18 · 18 replies
    The Briefing Room ^ | 7/20/18 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • Thursday Thumbs Up

    07/19/2018 9:12:30 AM PDT · by sodpoodle · 3 replies
    email from a friend | 7/19/2018 | unknown
    Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House for Obama. One is from Chicago, another is from Kentucky, and the third is from New Orleans. All three go with a White House official to examine the fence. The New Orleans contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. "Well," he says, "I figure the job will run about $9,000. That's $4,000 for materials, $4,000 for my crew and $1,000 profit for me." The Kentucky contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, "I can do...
  • Today's Toons 7/19/18

    07/19/2018 3:56:20 AM PDT · by pookie18 · 21 replies
    The Right Reasons ^ | 7/19/18 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • Video: Spaceballs the Witch Hunt

    07/18/2018 7:16:52 PM PDT · by EdnaMode · 5 replies
    You Tube ^ | July 18, 2018 | Big Game Productions
    In a vain attempt to prove that Lone Don is guilty of Russian collusion, Lord Mueller and Colonel Rosenstein comb the desert looking for clues.
  • Dennis Rodman Wants to Introduce Kanye West to Kim Jong-Un

    07/18/2018 5:31:30 PM PDT · by CondoleezzaProtege · 12 replies
    Breitbart ^ | Jul 2018 | Warner Todd Huston
    Former NBA star Dennis Rodman says he wants to introduce rapper Kanye West to North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un during his next international trip in September. Rodman claimed that he decided to offer the opportunity to the Grammy-winner after West tweeted that Rodman was one of his “biggest inspirations.” 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌 Thank to one of my biggest inspirations … always breaking barriers with independent thought — KANYE WEST (@kanyewest) July 10, 2018 “You know, I don’t do Instagram and stuff like that. My kids do it. I just know my agent called me and said, ‘Dennis, Kanye West gave you...
  • Man steals dates car, then uses it for another date

    07/18/2018 5:19:14 PM PDT · by ameribbean expat · 36 replies
    MEMPHIS, Tenn. A Memphis woman feels betrayed after her date stole her car and then used it to go on a date with her God sister.
  • God is Busy Right Now

    07/18/2018 1:46:49 PM PDT · by sodpoodle · 18 replies
    email from a friend | 7/18/2018 | unknown
    If you don't know GOD, don't make stupid remarks!!!!!! A United States Marine was taking some college courses between assignments. He had completed 20 missions in Iraq and Afghanistan . One of the courses had a professor who was an avowed atheist, and a member of the ACLU. >p?One day the professor shocked the class when he came in. He looked to the ceiling and flatly stated, "GOD, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform... I'll give you exactly 15 min." The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop. Ten...
  • Tim Allens Last Man Standing mocks network change in new teaser

    07/18/2018 10:44:25 AM PDT · by jazusamo · 22 replies
    Fox News ^ | Brian Flood
    In a new teaser for the return of Tim Allens Last Man Standing, the sitcoms stars make a not-so-subtle reference to the shows move from ABC to Fox. Look at that, look, its a fox, Nancy Travis, who plays Allens wife on the show, says as the couple sits around a campfire in a promo that was released on Tuesday. Allens Mike Baxter responds, What is it? Yeah a fox, Travis Vanessa Baxter responds. The TV wife repeats the word fox until Allen says, I know somebodys gonna be happy you said that three times. 15 sec video: Preview: Check...
  • Joke: Stormy Daniels and Queen Elizabeth went to the Pearly Gates on the same day.

    07/18/2018 9:07:25 AM PDT · by gattaca · 19 replies
    They both met with an angel to find out if they would be admitted to Heaven. The angel said: "Unfortunately, there's only one space available in Heaven today so I must decide which one of you will be admitted.” The angel asked Stormy if there was some particular reason why she should go to Heaven. Stormy took off her top and said: "Look at these, they're the most perfect breasts God ever created and I'm sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity.” The angel thanked Stormy, and asked Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth...
  • Today's Toons 7/18/18

    07/18/2018 1:21:51 AM PDT · by pookie18 · 13 replies
    The Politics Forums ^ | 7/18/18 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • Nostalgia and Naughties

    07/17/2018 7:13:29 AM PDT · by sodpoodle · 35 replies
    email from a friend | 7/17/2018 | unknown
    nostalgia video here: and this: EATING IN THE FIFTIES Pasta had not been invented. It was macaroni or spaghetti. Curry was a surname. Taco? Never saw one till I was 15. All chips were plain. Oil was for lubricating, fat was for cooking. Tea was made in a teapot using tea leaves and never green. Cubed sugar was regarded as posh. Chickens didn't have fingers in those days. None of us had ever heard of yogurt. Healthy food consisted of anything edible! Cooking outside was called camping. Seaweed was not a recognized food. 'Kebab' was not even a word......
  • BREAKING NEWS: Three U.S. Military Personnel Under Investigation for Collaborating with the Russians

    07/17/2018 4:51:06 AM PDT · by Alberta's Child · 40 replies
    Self ^ | 7/17/2018 | Alberta's Child
    In a bombshell story that dates back to September 2017, three current and former U.S. military personnel are under investigation by a myriad of U.S. government agencies and Congressional offices, the Office of the Special Counsel (Robert Mueller), and various media outlets including CNN, MSNBC, and even Fox News. Details of the story have been breaking overnight in the U.S. The three men are accused of traveling to a former Soviet republic in Asia over a period from September to December of 2017, collaborating with Russian military officials at a secret military installation, and assisting the Russians in a mission...
  • Today's Toons 7/17/18

    07/17/2018 3:27:58 AM PDT · by pookie18 · 26 replies
    The Right Reasons ^ | 7/17/18 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • Donald Trump's GoldenHair

    07/16/2018 1:32:15 PM PDT · by Twotone · 2 replies
    YouTube ^ | June 9, 2018 | Unknown
    As the meeting with Kim Jong-Un approaches, Huw Parkinson takes a look at the adventures of secret agent Donald Trump and discovers his troubles back on home soil continue to both shake AND stir.
  • Today's Toons 7/16/18

    07/16/2018 1:19:55 AM PDT · by pookie18 · 19 replies
    The Briefing Room ^ | 7/16/18 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • More Protective MAGA Helmets Now Available For Trump Supporters. (SATIRE)

    07/15/2018 5:24:39 PM PDT · by tennmountainman · 6 replies
    The Babylon Bee ^ | 7-15-2018 | Unattributed
    SATIRE. While President Trumps official website has long sold Make America Great Again hats, a recent uptick in calls for public pushback against Trump supporters has led to the website replacing the hats with MAGA helmets for anyone brave enough to go out in public wearing them.