TORRICELLI SWITCH POOL: Thursday, September 17, 2020 at 3:45 PM - Tie Breaker: Michelle Obama

Take it to the bank...

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Taglines

Gun Control Haiku: Say "Confiscation", / And they call you paranoid. / So say "Privacy".

I don't give them Hell / I tell the truth about them / And they think it's Hell" -- Harry Truman

If you have a Right / To the service I provide / I must be your Slave

Hello! My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

You can force me to recycle, but I will NOT sing the song!

What we've got here is ... failure to communicate

The 2nd Amendment immediately follows the 1st because some people are hard of hearing

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Martin Niemöller Revisited (Stolen from The Sacred Cow Slaughtrhouse)

First they came for the blacks, and I spoke up because it was wrong, even though I'm not black.

Then they came for the gays, and I spoke up, even though I'm not gay.

Then they came for the Muslims, and I spoke up, because it was wrong, even though I'm not a Muslim

When they came for illegal aliens, I spoke up, even though I'm US born

Then they came for the pornographers, rebels and dissenters and their speech and flag burning, and I spoke up, because rights are not only for the establishment.

Then they came for the gun owners, and you liberal turds threw me under the bus, even though I'd done nothing wrong.

So when they come to put you on the train, don't come crying to me.

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Haiku Guy's Principle of Government Boondoggles:

Any government program that has broad public support based on strong emotional appeal will become a wasteful boondoggle as sharp operators move in to exploit the public willingness to throw money at the program. The more powerful the appeal, the bigger the boondoggle.

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Robert Conquest's Three Laws of Politics:

1. Everyone is conservative about what he knows best.

2. Any organization not explicitly right-wing sooner or later becomes left-wing.

3. The simplest way to explain the behavior of any bureaucratic organization is to assume that it is controlled by a cabal of its enemies.

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Winston Churchill on When to Fight:

Still, if you will not fight for the right when you can easily win without bloodshed;
if you will not fight when your victory will be sure and not too costly;
you may come to the moment when you will have to fight with all the odds against you and only a precarious chance of survival.
There may even be a worse case.
You may have to fight when there is no hope of victory, because it is better to perish than live as slaves.

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The Gods of the Copybook Headings

AS I PASS through my incarnations in every age and race,
I make my proper prostrations to the Gods of the Market Place.
Peering through reverent fingers I watch them flourish and fall,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings, I notice, outlast them all.

We were living in trees when they met us. They showed us each in turn
That Water would certainly wet us, as Fire would certainly burn:
But we found them lacking in Uplift, Vision and Breadth of Mind,
So we left them to teach the Gorillas while we followed the March of Mankind.

We moved as the Spirit listed. They never altered their pace,
Being neither cloud nor wind-borne like the Gods of the Market Place,
But they always caught up with our progress, and presently word would come
That a tribe had been wiped off its icefield, or the lights had gone out in Rome.

With the Hopes that our World is built on they were utterly out of touch,
They denied that the Moon was Stilton; they denied she was even Dutch;
They denied that Wishes were Horses; they denied that a Pig had Wings;
So we worshipped the Gods of the Market Who promised these beautiful things.

When the Cambrian measures were forming, They promised perpetual peace.
They swore, if we gave them our weapons, that the wars of the tribes would cease.
But when we disarmed They sold us and delivered us bound to our foe,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said: "Stick to the Devil you know."

On the first Feminian Sandstones we were promised the Fuller Life
(Which started by loving our neighbour and ended by loving his wife)
Till our women had no more children and the men lost reason and faith,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said: "The Wages of Sin is Death."

In the Carboniferous Epoch we were promised abundance for all,
By robbing selected Peter to pay for collective Paul;
But, though we had plenty of money, there was nothing our money could buy,
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said: "If you don't work you die."

Then the Gods of the Market tumbled, and their smooth-tongued wizards withdrew
And the hearts of the meanest were humbled and began to believe it was true
That All is not Gold that Glitters, and Two and Two make Four
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings limped up to explain it once more.

As it will be in the future, it was at the birth of Man
There are only four things certain since Social Progress began.
That the Dog returns to his Vomit and the Sow returns to her Mire,
And the burnt Fool's bandaged finger goes wabbling back to the Fire;

And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins
When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins,
As surely as Water will wet us, as surely as Fire will burn,
The Gods of the Copybook Headings with terror and slaughter return!

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And now an important message from Jon Luc Picard:

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The Takeover of the Democratic Party:

Admit the Problem.
Republicans are weasels.
We know this for sure.

The question is, what do we do about it? Our problem is that the Democrats have ideological conformity and the Republicans do not. So the Republicans lose to the Democrats on ideological grounds, over and over again.

The two possible solutions are to A)Enforce Ideological Conformity on the Repubicans or B)Introduce Ideological Diversity to the Democrats.

Now, we have been trying to herd the Republican cats down the Conservative road for generations, and it just ain't working. Politicians are feckless weenies who will stab us all in the back at a moment's notice for slight political advantage. We can keep on trying to do the same thing, but we will probably get the same result.

The Democrats, on the other hand, have a huge disconnect between their ideology and their voter base. Most Democrats hate Obamacare and Trillion Dollar deficits and confiscatory taxation as much as the Republicans do. They recognize that the government is out of control, and they want to restore balance and traditional American values.

This leaves an opening for ideological Conservatives to win races in the Democratic Party. Certainly they will be able to steal primaries in heavily Republican Congressional Districts, which are not vigorously contested. Then they can challenge the sitting feckless RINOs from the Right!

If there were ten or fifteen Conservative small-government Democrats in the House of Representatives, it would be a whole new ballgame. Battles could be fought on an ideological basis instead of on strict party loyalty. And if the arguments are ideological, Conservatives win.

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CHESTERTON'S FENCE

In the matter of reforming things, as distinct from deforming them, there
is one plain and simple principle; a principle which will probably be called
a paradox. There exists in such a case a certain institution or law; let us
say, for the sake of simplicity, a fence or gate erected across a road. The
more modern type of reformer goes gaily up to it and says, “I don’t see the
use of this; let us clear it away.” To which the more intelligent type of
reformer will do well to answer: “If you don’t see the use of it, I
certainly won’t let you clear it away. Go away and think. Then, when you
can come back and tell me that you do see the use of it, I may allow you to
destroy it.

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The Sons of Martha -- Rudyard Kipling.

THE Sons of Mary seldom bother, for they have inherited that good part;
But the Sons of Martha favour their Mother of the careful soul and the troubled heart.
And because she lost her temper once, and because she was rude to the Lord her Guest,
Her Sons must wait upon Mary's Sons, world without end, reprieve, or rest.

It is their care in all the ages to take the buffet and cushion the shock.
It is their care that the gear engages; it is their care that the switches lock.
It is their care that the wheels run truly; it is their care to embark and entrain,
Tally, transport, and deliver duly the Sons of Mary by land and main.

They say to mountains, " Be ye removèd" They say to the lesser floods " Be dry."
Under their rods are the rocks reprovèd - they are not afraid of that which is high.
Then do the hill tops shake to the summit - then is the bed of the deep laid bare,
That the Sons of Mary may overcome it, pleasantly sleeping and unaware.

They finger death at their gloves' end where they piece and repiece the living wires.
He rears against the gates they tend: they feed him hungry behind their fires.
Early at dawn, ere men see clear, they stumble into his terrible stall,
And hale him forth like a haltered steer, and goad and turn him till evenfall.

To these from birth is Belief forbidden; from these till death is Relief afar.
They are concerned with matters hidden - under the earthline their altars are
The secret fountains to follow up, waters withdrawn to restore to the mouth,
And gather the floods as in a cup, and pour them again at a city's drouth.

They do not preach that their God will rouse them a little before the nuts work loose.
They do not teach that His Pity allows them to leave their job when they damn-well choose.
As in the thronged and the lighted ways, so in the dark and the desert they stand,
Wary and watchful all their days that their brethren's days may be long in the land.

Raise ye the stone or cleave the wood to make a path more fair or flat;
Lo, it is black already with blood some Son of Martha spilled for that!
Not as a ladder from earth to Heaven, not as a witness to any creed,
But simple service simply given to his own kind in their common need.

And the Sons of Mary smile and are blessèd - they know the angels are on their side.
They know in them is the Grace confessèd, and for them are the Mercies multiplied.
They sit at the Feet - they hear the Word - they see how truly the Promise runs.
They have cast their burden upon the Lord, and - the Lord He lays it on Martha's Sons !