Posted on 02/12/2020 10:54:28 AM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
Why does the world of dating seem so complicated? Lauren Chen, host of Pseudo-Intellectual on Blaze TV, offers some useful navigational tools. It starts with this basic question: what is the purpose of dating? The answer may shock you.
I well remember dating with the purpose of getting married. It’s not as easy as some make it out to be. Generally, when a woman wants a relationship, the man RUNS.
This is very simple
it’s all about relationship
Do you want to find somebody that you like to spend time with and become best friends with
If you’re young you want to find somebody that you can marry and spend your life with and have children
Worth seeing. That said, I will state that it is important to deeply explore what each person understands by marriage.
Hard Knock U.
“What is the purpose of dating?”
To find out how much the guy makes at his job.
When I “dated”, the purpose was to “get laid” or at least make out. This was back in the early 70’s, though. If my wife were to die now and I even chose to ever date again, it would be to get married.
I remember, the year after I graduated from high school, some of us actually said out loud that we wanted to avoid college girls because they just want to get married. Boy, were we werong - but the sentiment was there.
But this is just the male perspective from one male and his impression of what his male friends were going for.
Bkmk
I agree (speaking as a male).
I confess that when I was first married at age 21, my primary goal was to do the “right thing” and at least I’d get regular sex and we would probably be fine as long as we were committed to our goals as a family. I naturally grew up as the years passed.
After 20 years, though, as our three daughters all entered their teen years, she went kinda crazy. The result was that she wanted to move on. This put me, in my early 40’s into an apartment and wondering what I was going to do. No problem. I met the love of my life at my 25 year high school class reunion. We’ve been together 22 years and it only gets better with every year.
However, in my early 40’s I was looking for a relationship - and I found one through a long distance courtship (it was all emails and phone calls because she didn’t live in the area). She flew in to visit again and I proposed, and that was it.
And the funny part is there was (for the first ten years, anyway) ten times the passion of the 20-something relationship. It’s tapered off since then - a little...
When you focus on the person, and they focus on you, it simply gets no better. The rest of it takes care of itself.
Smart lady. The more people who take her advice, the better will be our society.
You know she’s the one when you enjoy her resting her Head in your Lap face up as much as face down.
Oops, did I just say that out loud?
Waiting for this Post to be deleted in 3, 2, 1...
, ,
Then She Takes It All!
I was just thinking the same thing. If I were to become single again, I would love the companionship of a woman. But I am pretty sure I would not get involved in a marriage.
Never say never. But it would be a while.
I can still drive at night..so I have that going for me.
{{{To find out how much the guy makes at his job.}}}
I had a few people over the house, this hot young chick says to me:
HOT CHICK: Who’s house?
ME: Mine
HOT CHICK: WOW nice house!
ME: Thanks
HOT CHICK: Do you have a girlfriend?
Yep that really happened.
First Rule of Dating
Never start a relationship
with someone you would not, in theory, marry
Learned that as a teenage boy
If you are not going to have kids then there’s no reason to get married. You can be 55 and marry another 55 year old and if she divorces you she can still screw you over big time in divorce court.
There’s no tangible reason for a guy (especially if he is over 40)who is finished having children to remarry again. You are asking for trouble.
I have taught all my children that dating is to find a wife or husband. As soon as you know this person is not going to be your spouse no more dates. They have all followed this closely. My oldest son is now married (21) and his younger brother (20) dated a girl that he knew for a couple of weeks but she was not well suited for him. She wanted to rebel against her parents.
Both of my boys were taught to respect women and when they went to basic training in the Marine Corps they were “outed” as Christians and respecters of women (yes you know what I mean) so they took a little ribbing but once they got to SOI they were seen as outstanding Marines who were helping fellow Marines in class and during range time which lead to promotions and lots of personal respect from others.
I write this because I have many friends and acquaintances who don’t think it is possible to raise testosterone filled men’s men with ability to control their lusts and impulses, just like many on FR which is seen in their comments.
I started dating my wife when I was 15. We married when I was 19 and this year we celebrate our 28th anniversary.
The hook up cultures effects on our society is devastating.
To count sexual intimacy as a common thing impedes future long term relationships in ways to numerous to name.
Sex has a undeniable spiritual component.
Parents this is one place you can’t get wrong and can’t ignore thinking it will work it’s self out.
bfl
I guess that I asked for trouble! Got remarried at 50, we had our first child when I was 60 and the kids are teenagers now... Couldn’t be happier!
Never start a relationship
with someone you would not, in theory, marry
~~~
I think it’s a stereotype that females are immediately sizing up their dates as marriage material and that males don’t. Perhaps not as early as high school, but pretty early on I would be paying attention to everything about my dates and (sad to say it this way but it’s true) scoring them based on whether I thought it made them compatible for long term relationship (or marriage).
The other sad fact that I learned though is that some people are capable of hiding their darker and deeper personality flaws for a very long time. The worse it is, the more they hide it.
I can still drive at night..so I have that going for me.
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