Titus 2:11 "For the Grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. Teaching us that denying ungodliness and wordly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly in this present world. Looking for that blessed hope, and the appearing of the great God and our Saviour, Jesus Christ.
Who gave himself for us, that he might redeem us from all iniquity, and purify unto himself a peculiar people, zealous of good works. These things speak, and exort with great authority. Let no man despise you. Put them in mind to be subject to principalities and powers, to obey magistrates, to be ready to every good work.
This tells Christians to not be shy about demanding their right to fit this description and ask those that wish to associate with their membership to do the same. The bible also tells Christians to put away from their midsts those that will not repent. Not out of malice, but that God may give them over to Satan which may draw them to repentence and salvation of their souls.
1 Timothy 1:20 "Of whom is Hymenaeus and Alexander, whom I have delivered unto Satan, that they may learn not to blaspheme.
The problem with Christians today is that they most don't know who they are or what is expected of them. This Church doesn't seem to have this problem. They are not only within their rights, but within God's will. They don't hate this woman, she has made her choice and they have made their's, the two are not compatible, so she needs to make another choice or move on.
"I wrote you in my letter not to associate with immoral people; I did at all mean with the immoral people of this world, or with the covetous and swindlers, or with idolaters, for then you would have to go out of the world. But actually, I wrote to you not to asociate with any so-called brother if he is an immoral person, or covetous, or an idolater or a reviler, or a drunkard, or a swindler -- not even to eat with such a one. For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Do you not judge those who are in the church? But those who are outside, God judges. REMOVE THE WICKED MAN FROM AMONG YOURSELVES." I Corinthians 5:9-13.
I get very tired of the "Judge not" crowd misinterpreting scripture.