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Why Husbands Kill Their Wives
Daily Press ^ | June 26, 2009 | Patt Abrahamson

Posted on 06/27/2009 3:05:30 PM PDT by nickcarraway

Is murder becoming a divorce substitute? It seems that men murdering their spouses has become more rampant or is it just more sensationalized and followed blow by blow on news magazine shows and Larry King Live because it is so bizarre? God forbid that men murdering their partner become so commonplace it isn't news anymore. The public is shocked beyond belief but yet find the heinous acts titillating

Till "Death do us Part" seems to have taken on a new meaning. One of the most notorious cases in recent history that riveted the country was the televised court proceedings of O.J. Simpson. Another case that captured the American people was Scott Peterson killing his beautiful pregnant wife, Laci.

Too close to home was Tom Richardson, the husband that pushed his wife over the spectacular cliff at the Pictured Rocks in Munising; The Tara Grant case: Tara, born in the UP was murdered by her husband who cut up her body into pieces in Lower Michigan. The 1988 Escanaba case of Vincent Loonsfoot who murdered his estranged wife and children.

I remember an Escanaba case in the 40s when the wife gassed herself by putting her head in the oven. She was depressed over her husband's blatant affair. Surely he killed her by taking away her will to live.

Seventy-five percent of domestic homicides occur just after or during abandonment. Often the wife has a restraining order at the time of the murder.

New cases present constantly-the reasons never cease-but are just as heinous and bizarre. Most recently the alleged case of Christopher Coleman killing both his wife, Sherry, and their two boys by strangulation is just beyond the pale.

Then there is the case of Drew Peterson now in jail for the alleged murder of his third wife. He is also a suspect in the disappearance of wife number four who has gone missing. His televised arrogance has made him a hated man.

The first time I ever heard of a shocking murder was in the 1950s while living in Chicago. Vincent Ciocchi shot his wife and five children; then burned their house down to cover his crime for the affections of 20 year-old Carol Amora.

Most of those cited cases were about husbands who were having affairs. But reasons to shed their wives are many and varied. Sex, philandering, money (either insurance or an unwillingness to split assets) and jealousy are just a few of the motives.

More dads are taking out their entire families. They don't want to split their money and possessions; nor do they want to pay child support; as in the case of Scott Peterson. What kind of a man could strangle his children in their beds or burn the house down to get rid of them? On the other side of the coin some dads kill their wives over custody battles. And of course there is the crime of passion-or rage-that is not-premeditated.

The convicted murderers are incarcerated for life or waiting on death-row. Isn't it interesting that none of them are guilty according to them. They spend their days working on appeals and trying to find loop-holes in the law.

Even more bizarre are the crazy women that write to convicted murderers and want to marry them-in jail. What makes them tick? It's a crazy mixed-up dangerous world if you stop and think about it.

Women are not only victims of domestic violence; but are stalked and prey to the crazies. They just have to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. In urban areas just going out jogging can be dangerous.

Men hire a surrogate to kill. Other men will kill for as little as $1,000. Hiding and mutilating the bodies happens more often than you can imagine. For years it was thought: no body, no conviction. Circumstantial evidence is more difficult to prove beyond a reasonable doubt.

Today, with DNA and the sophistication regarding forensic evidence, there are many more convictions. I remember an Escanaba case where a woman's body washed up, I believe, in the area of the municipal dock. Her purse was found on land. She had been seen in local bars the night before her purse was discovered. Murder or suicide? We'll never know. In the late 40s police and detectives weren't sophisticated enough. As I remember, people that should have been questioned were not. A person could probably get away with murder much more easily back then.

When you think about it: Two people meet, fall in love and join in the sacrament of matrimony; they promise to love and honor one another. How could those attending the wedding ever imagine the union would end up in murder?

Over time, day to day life gets in the way. But how could a man who once professed undying love for his wife end up eventually taking her life and quite often leaving his children motherless. And yet have the audacity to think he can get away with murder?

Most of us will never understand how such a beautiful beginning can have such a tragic ending. After all, divorce is an option.


TOPICS: Miscellaneous; Society
KEYWORDS: domesticviolence
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To: ozaukeemom

Do you have any brothers?


21 posted on 06/27/2009 3:36:00 PM PDT by nickcarraway
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To: nickcarraway

Husbands and wives go at each other pretty equally. The difference in outcome is largely due to differences in physical strength.


22 posted on 06/27/2009 3:36:03 PM PDT by fso301
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To: nickcarraway

What’s the big deal? This is just men exercising their abortion rights.

My family, my choice.


23 posted on 06/27/2009 3:42:15 PM PDT by papertyger (A difference that makes no difference is no difference)
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To: mamelukesabre

The worst imaginable scenario there is for a man is if the wife just decides she likes someone or something else better and wants to leave. She gets to take everything and go for no real reason, just because she wants it that way. Leave the man childless and homeless and stuck with alimony and child support. I know a woman that did that to her husband.

I would lose my mind if that happened to me.


I would have a tough time with that one too!

Often though, the male climbs the ladder, has the wife raise the kiddies and then trades her in for a “trophy wife”. There she is ... middle aged and less attractive with kids grown. She gave up her life for him and the kids. So for either side of the fence there is a tragedy.

NO ONE WINS with divorce.

I’ve yet to meet a couple that says,

“I don’t want this marriage to last.”

What’s worse is they typically re-marry the same PROBELEM they divorced. They REFUSE to admit they shared in what went wrong. Pride is a terrible thing.


24 posted on 06/27/2009 3:42:20 PM PDT by nmh (Intelligent people recognize Intelligent Design (God).)
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To: nickcarraway

Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap.


25 posted on 06/27/2009 3:48:09 PM PDT by Uncle Meat
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To: nmh
"Often though, the male climbs the ladder, has the wife raise the kiddies and then trades her in for a "trophy wife".

How strong can that "often" be when eighty percent of all divorces are initiated by the wife?

26 posted on 06/27/2009 3:54:55 PM PDT by papertyger (A difference that makes no difference is no difference)
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To: nickcarraway; OKSooner

Gosh....Not sure why, but for some reason the actions of Mark Sanford suddently pop into my mind.


27 posted on 06/27/2009 3:57:03 PM PDT by Honeybunch ("Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind." ~Rudyard Kipling)
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To: nmh
She gave up her life for him and the kids.

I am almost fifty years old, and I've yet to meet even one woman who gave up anything for anyone.

I've heard of this concept 'in theory' for my entire life, but never met even a single specimen 'in the wild.'

28 posted on 06/27/2009 4:01:31 PM PDT by papertyger (A difference that makes no difference is no difference)
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To: nmh
Why do they murder their wives?

Given that 75 % of divorces are initiated by women, could it be some of them think they are getting "screwed" by the "system" ? Its very frustrating when you have no legal recourse and are about to be financially raped, and often its not your fault. Not that thats a great excuse, but what the heck; marriage and death go together, I guess you can say.

29 posted on 06/27/2009 4:06:45 PM PDT by Nonstatist
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To: nickcarraway

Maybe divorce has become too expensive.


30 posted on 06/27/2009 4:07:01 PM PDT by SWAMPSNIPER (THE SECOND AMENDMENT, A MATTER OF FACT, NOT A MATTER OF OPINION)
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To: wolf24

Early one morning while making the rounds
Took a shot of cocaine and I shot her down


31 posted on 06/27/2009 4:37:49 PM PDT by Lonesome in Massachussets (AGWT is very robust with respect to data. All observations confirm it at the 100% confidence level.)
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To: nickcarraway

I always wondered why no one has tried the following endeavor... a man who wants to divorce his wife can hire an enterprising gigolo to seduce his wife away from him... up to and including the act of adultery. Armed with videotaped evidence, a prospective divorcing husband could easily get a “nice” divorce with no alimony payments required. :)


32 posted on 06/27/2009 4:55:43 PM PDT by pnh102 (Regarding liberalism, always attribute to malice what you think can be explained by stupidity. - Me)
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To: nickcarraway

“Marry in haste, repent in leisure.”

Much modern marital discord comes from a lack of both real intimacy and empathy between partners. In the South, there used to be a real acid test for a couple to determine if their marriage would last, before they were married. It was called, “necking”. And it was not easy.

It has very strict rules, which must be obeyed by both partners, and was based on the idea that kissing is far more intimate than sex. In this case, kissing for an entire hour.

If a man and a woman can kiss for an entire hour, with no offsides with the hands, they will likely stay married.

Most people can tell within a few minutes if the person they are kissing is *not* compatible. They cannot comfortably sit next to each other, their timing is off, they get distracted and usually the feeling is mutual. Importantly, then they *know* better than to waste their time to try and “make it work”, because it is *not* going to work.

Importantly, there are some people who might neck with a dozen partners before they realize that they might as well write off the whole idea of marriage. Because they “just aren’t the marrying kind.” Nothing personal, mind you, but the light dawns that they are just not going to be happy in marriage with anyone, so don’t bother.

The next big bump is “The Seven Year Itch”. And the best way to get over this is by reestablishing intimacy and empathy. But this is a different technique from necking. It is using healing massage, like acupressure, sometimes called Shiatsu.

It’s based on the simple idea that people appreciate those who “take away their ouchy places.” When a person massages another person, it boosts the empathy between them. In turn, this relieves a whole lot of the little tensions and stresses that build up between people over time. People also learn to relax more in each others’ presence, which creates a pleasant association.


33 posted on 06/27/2009 5:06:40 PM PDT by yefragetuwrabrumuy
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To: nickcarraway

No brothers. This was over 20 years ago. My roommates and I got him out of the house. He was a very bad guy. I haven’t seen him since I testified at their divorce hearing! lol
I do agree that the system seems to favor women when it comes to some crimes. A man should be able to defend themselves too.
I know one thing. I would never,and would discourage anyone else, from dating and/or marrying someone with the last name of Peterson! ;)


34 posted on 06/27/2009 5:07:04 PM PDT by ozaukeemom (It's Obama's fault.)
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To: pnh102

What state do you live in? Any divorce I’ve heard of, adultery is immaterial. The cases I’ve seen, the judge refused to allow evidence of adultery into the record.


35 posted on 06/27/2009 5:07:27 PM PDT by nickcarraway
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To: nickcarraway

“Is murder becoming a divorce substitute?”

No. Stop enticing us with the lead at the expense of common sense.


36 posted on 06/27/2009 5:16:51 PM PDT by Tublecane
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To: Nonstatist
Its very frustrating when you have no legal recourse and are about to be financially raped

Yep.

37 posted on 06/27/2009 5:22:49 PM PDT by Centurion2000 (Out of gas become a pill box, Out of ammo become a bunker, Out of hope become a hero.)
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Comment #38 Removed by Moderator

To: nickcarraway

In the politically incorrect era, they called it “Divorce, Italian Style.”


39 posted on 06/27/2009 5:59:16 PM PDT by scrabblehack
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To: nickcarraway
I live in Virginia and my brother divorced his wife for adultery. She wanted to shack up with her lover-boy and was afraid to kick up too much of a fuss because she was concerned that she would lose her beloved Lexus and she also assumed she would get their sons. My brother ended up with their kids, the house, his truck, the extra car, the boat and a lovely new wife. The ex-wife ended up unemployed, in debt, carless and lives with her mother since the other man dumped her for a different model.

Take heart men. Sometimes good guys do win.

40 posted on 06/27/2009 6:02:31 PM PDT by constitutiongirl ("Duty is ours. Consequences are God's."- General Thomas 'Stonewall' Jackson)
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