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5 Suggestions to Make Soccer More Palatable for American Audiences
Pajamas Media ^ | 06/18/2014 | Rick Moran

Posted on 06/18/2014 6:54:10 AM PDT by SeekAndFind

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1 posted on 06/18/2014 6:54:11 AM PDT by SeekAndFind
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To: SeekAndFind
5 Suggestions to Make Soccer More Palatable for American Audiences
  1. Don't watch it.
  2. See #1
  3. See #1
  4. See #1
  5. See #1

2 posted on 06/18/2014 6:56:21 AM PDT by oh8eleven (RVN '67-'68)
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To: SeekAndFind

6. Name one of their teams The Redskins.


3 posted on 06/18/2014 6:56:49 AM PDT by FlingWingFlyer (Obama's smidgens are coming home to roost.)
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To: SeekAndFind
OK, new and "improved" keep away. Most Americans outgrew that by the 7th grade.
4 posted on 06/18/2014 6:57:25 AM PDT by mad_as_he$$
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To: SeekAndFind
Great. Yet another thing I have to embrace or be scorned as a "hater".

For that reason alone, Soccer can suck it.

5 posted on 06/18/2014 6:57:28 AM PDT by laotzu
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To: SeekAndFind

What makes the author think it’s important to the rest of the world that Americans like soccer?


6 posted on 06/18/2014 6:57:30 AM PDT by Wolfie
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To: SeekAndFind

I would disagree on ‘injury-time’. The fakeness of the whole thing is more worth watching than most of the game. When they show the slow-motion stuff, and you see how the guy is faking a fall...it’s like some Academy Award stuff...strictly polished at falling and doing it to claim severe injury. Good stuff, if you ask me.


7 posted on 06/18/2014 6:57:50 AM PDT by pepsionice
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To: SeekAndFind

Play the game with the head of a Jihadist.


8 posted on 06/18/2014 6:58:33 AM PDT by fwdude ( You cannot compromise with that which you must defeat.)
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To: SeekAndFind

Execute the losing team. Guaranteed rise to the top of the public desire.


9 posted on 06/18/2014 7:00:06 AM PDT by Gaffer
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To: SeekAndFind

1) It’s more or less a tradition at this point, and it’s hard to change tradition in this sport. Otherwise, I have no problem with the suggestion.

2) Meh. It’s rarely an issue in a game that’s far more about possession than it is about position (unlike American football, for example). When it really matters, the referee or linesman generally get pretty picky about taking it from the right place.

3) Agreed. Refs should be quicker to issue yellow cards for diving and league/tournament officials should be able to suspend players for egregious examples after games, regardless of whether or not they got away with it in real time.

4) No. The author gets the rule wrong and none of the suggested changes would keep even the remotest spirit of the rule intact.

5) No. The way to make everyone better is to improve, not to tear down others. The citizenship rules do need so revise, however.


10 posted on 06/18/2014 7:00:41 AM PDT by kevkrom (I'm not an unreasonable man... well, actually, I am. But hear me out anyway.)
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To: SeekAndFind

Here’s an idea: how about soccer take itself seriously first, and decide its World Championship by actually playing soccer, instead of some possibly invoking some retarded coin-flipping contest?


11 posted on 06/18/2014 7:03:07 AM PDT by Hegewisch Dupa
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To: SeekAndFind

#6. Widen the goals to allow some actual scoring. These 0-0 games are mind-numbingly boring.


12 posted on 06/18/2014 7:03:35 AM PDT by ScottinVA (If it doesn't include border security, it isn't "reform." It's called "amnesty.")
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To: SeekAndFind

OK, so now if we don’t care for soccer, we are “HATERS”?


13 posted on 06/18/2014 7:06:06 AM PDT by left that other site (You shall know the Truth, and The Truth Shall Set You Free.)
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To: pepsionice
When they show the slow-motion stuff, and you see how the guy is faking a fall

And once they hit the ground, they roll.. and roll.. and roll. For effect.

14 posted on 06/18/2014 7:06:22 AM PDT by ScottinVA (If it doesn't include border security, it isn't "reform." It's called "amnesty.")
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To: SeekAndFind

A Beyonce halftime extravaganza. Ummm.... would be way more exciting than an actual soccer game. (and it would still suck)


15 posted on 06/18/2014 7:09:11 AM PDT by kjam22 (my music video "If My People" at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74b20RjILy4)
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To: SeekAndFind

Eliminate the goalie to allow for more scoring.


16 posted on 06/18/2014 7:13:02 AM PDT by Fiji Hill
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To: oh8eleven

Keep it a foreign sport on Univision.


17 posted on 06/18/2014 7:13:34 AM PDT by Resolute Conservative
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To: kevkrom

Don’t waste your time with these keyboard warriors. As I’ve noted before, if any of them ever actually found themselves on ANY playing field they’d most likely crap themselves then pass out (not necessarily in that order).


18 posted on 06/18/2014 7:14:48 AM PDT by safeasthebanks ("The most rewarding part, was when he gave me my money!" - Dr. Nick)
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To: SeekAndFind

Let the players pick up the ball and either run with it until tackled or throw it. Award two points for knocking over the goalie when a player scores while holding on to the ball and one point for the conventional kick into the net.

Call the two point score a touchdown.
Call the one point score a field goal.

Break the game into either 4 quarters or 9 innings.

Get Vin Scully to call the game.


19 posted on 06/18/2014 7:14:52 AM PDT by InterceptPoint
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To: SeekAndFind
(1) It's kind of nitpicking. If you stopped the clock, coaches would be arguing with refs the whole game about whether it was right to stop it, quibble with how long it was stopped, tired sides would deliberately stop the clock to break up action, etc.

It's not a big deal.

(2) Placement only really matters some of the time. I've never heard of a throw-in spot deciding the outcome of a game.

(3) The diving is sickening. Simple rule revision: if the foul was blatant, call it. If the not-obviously-fouled player is hurt so badly that he is writhing on the pitch in pain, then he should be substituted. If all the substitutes are gone, then the side plays a man light.

Then, all of a sudden, you'd see a little less whining.

(4) The offsides rule is simple, and fine. As long as you're on the opposing team's half of the field, you can't be in front of the ball unless at least two defenders are in front of you.

It's not rocket science.

(5) Who cares if some teams are perennial achievers? The rule should be that you can choose to play for any country which considers you a citizen.

20 posted on 06/18/2014 7:15:02 AM PDT by wideawake
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