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Is It Ever Okay to Spank?
National Review ^ | 09/22/2014 | Mona Charen

Posted on 09/23/2014 6:28:54 AM PDT by SeekAndFind

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1 posted on 09/23/2014 6:28:54 AM PDT by SeekAndFind
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To: SeekAndFind

Yes.


2 posted on 09/23/2014 6:33:17 AM PDT by Ingtar (The NSA - "We're the only part of government who actually listens to the people.")
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To: SeekAndFind

I have read that parents who don’t spank yell more. Kids eyes will glaze over while they wait for the rant to end, learning nothing and not changing the behavior.


3 posted on 09/23/2014 6:37:14 AM PDT by NorthstarMom
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To: SeekAndFind

The one time I got the belt I had black-and-blue marks for a week...

It’s been 40 years and I STILL won’t tell a lie to my Father.

Used appropriately, negative physical feedback can be very effective. Used too much, and it can have an opposite effect as we see in cases of generational abuse.


4 posted on 09/23/2014 6:37:21 AM PDT by Dead Corpse (A Psalm in napalm...)
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To: SeekAndFind
But what also could be true is that the streets may not have been so mean if they were not populated by so many kids who are angry at the world because, among other things, they were spanked.

This brain trust is completely disregarding the effect that the kids' social group has on their attitude. IMHO spanking was not meted out often enough, nor to the right subject.

5 posted on 09/23/2014 6:37:39 AM PDT by rjsimmon (The Tree of Liberty Thirsts)
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To: SeekAndFind

“spanking inhibits the learning process . . . It leads to anger, depression, violence and alcohol and drug abuse. It breeds hostility toward authority . . . and spawns other antisocial behaviors.” Physical punishment, he continues “is associated with legions of sullen, angry, violence-prone boys . . . ” “

Evidence, please. (not poster, the person quoted).

I was spanked rarely and rarely spanked, but when I was or did, it was because other methods failed to work or the bad behavior was such that it could get someone killed (or worse).

Last resort, never in anger, rare, but sometimes necessary.


6 posted on 09/23/2014 6:39:35 AM PDT by Jewbacca (The residents of Iroquois territory may not determine whether Jews may live in Jerusalem)
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To: SeekAndFind

Punishment needs to be effective to create self-discipline in children. Spanking does that. I’m not sure whether there are more effective ways for most parents to instill that self-discipline. I suspect there may be but whether there are or not, its better to spank and have a child who can control himself or herself and be responsible for his or her own actions than a wild little terror who grows up to be irresponsible, lazy, unproductive and a net drain on society and his or her family.


7 posted on 09/23/2014 6:40:17 AM PDT by Opinionated Blowhard ("When the people find they can vote themselves money, that will herald the end of the republic.")
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To: SeekAndFind

There is a difference between a spanking and a beating.


8 posted on 09/23/2014 6:43:33 AM PDT by Psalm 73 ("Gentlemen, you can't fight in here - this is the War Room".)
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To: Jewbacca

We live in an era in which critical masses of parents do “time outs” rather than spanking.

I think we would all agree that beating children, physical assault, is not what we want to see happen. We want to see appropriate discipline, sometimes physical if needed.

Years ago, parents were free to spank their children. Now they aren’t.

Years ago, schools were allowed to administer corporal punishment. Now they aren’t. Nowadays, it’s against the law for authorities in schools to physically touch a child, otherwise be charged with assault.

Anecdotal evidence is that there are many ill mannered misbehaving children and teens when you go out in public. I think part of that is that parents today are not allowed to discipline children in the same manner as past generations could do.


9 posted on 09/23/2014 6:43:55 AM PDT by Dilbert San Diego (s)
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To: SeekAndFind

What Adrian Peterson did was not spanking and he should be kicked out of the NFL and put in jail.


10 posted on 09/23/2014 6:47:38 AM PDT by Morgana ( Always a bit of truth in dark humor.)
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To: Dead Corpse

Hits with a belt that left black and blue marks that lasted a week? You were abused. Doesn’t mean your father didn’t love you; doesn’t mean that he wasn’t a good father over all; but it does mean that, at least on that occasion, you were abused.


11 posted on 09/23/2014 6:56:23 AM PDT by utahagen
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To: Morgana

“What Adrian Peterson did was not spanking and he should be kicked out of the NFL and put in jail.”

I have to agree with this - based on what I’ve heard, and provided that the facts are correct.

My opinion is, as general rule of thumb any type of punishment done with anger is likely to be ultimately ineffective and to lead to resentment. I know abuse, personally, and it was always done with almost a competitive ‘I’ll show you, I win/you lose’ mocking and/or hateful type of demeanor. That’s how you know the difference.

Further, I don’t buy the ‘it’s part of my culture’ argument. It’s not a legitimate excuse for causing physical injuries to a child. Slavery was also a ‘part of the culture’ at one time. That obviously didn’t make it right.


12 posted on 09/23/2014 6:57:18 AM PDT by pieceofthepuzzle
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To: Dilbert San Diego
Found one family where "time out" included watching videos on a tablet. Small wonder the kid was is a terror.
13 posted on 09/23/2014 6:58:41 AM PDT by ctdonath2 (ن ☺)
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To: SeekAndFind
Usually I agree w/ Ms. Charen, however equating a spanking to verbal abuse or generalizing it as "violence" is silly. Of course you shouldn't beat a kid and leave wounds on them. A few measured swats on the behind can hardly be called "beating".

As with anything a parent must mete out punishment in calmer moments, not when you're angry. With my own kids I think spankings are best used for immediate behavior modification, and not as punishment per se. And thankfully I rarely have to do it.

What we have here is the same situation we have with the use of guns, food, and cold medicine: Because a few people abuse something then EVERYONE must stop doing it immediately, or their liberties MUST be stifled with more laws.

14 posted on 09/23/2014 6:59:00 AM PDT by opus86
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To: utahagen

Your opinion.


15 posted on 09/23/2014 7:01:31 AM PDT by Dead Corpse (A Psalm in napalm...)
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To: SeekAndFind

Didn’t we just go through this about a week ago?


16 posted on 09/23/2014 7:04:15 AM PDT by SkyDancer (I Was Told Nobody Is Perfect But Yet, Here I Am)
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To: ctdonath2

Watching videos during Time Out is NOT “Time Out”, so your criticism makes no sense. That’s akin to saying, “I know a family that took their kids to church every Sunday, and the kids sat in the church basement, watching Super Hero videos, while the parents were upstairs in the actual church...and the kids are now terrors...so don’t take your kids to church.”


17 posted on 09/23/2014 7:04:48 AM PDT by utahagen
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To: Dilbert San Diego

I always laugh a time out a bit. It assumes a somewhat compliant child. Mine would just get up and leave from the chair unless physically restrained.

We resorted to taking away blankets/stuffed animals, putting the dog out, no dinner, etc.


18 posted on 09/23/2014 7:07:15 AM PDT by Jewbacca (The residents of Iroquois territory may not determine whether Jews may live in Jerusalem)
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To: Dead Corpse
Um, yes, that's my opinion; opinions are what we post here on Free Republic. I believe the majority of even freepers would agree with me that at least on this one occasion, you were abused. There is no legal or moral right to take a belt to a child and leave him with bruises that last a week.
19 posted on 09/23/2014 7:08:55 AM PDT by utahagen
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To: SeekAndFind

I’ve just finished the draft for a book, regarding kids who totally own their parents.

Spanking is discussed as an option, along with about 60 other things a parent can do to subdue an incorrigible child. Just be wise about it.


20 posted on 09/23/2014 7:12:29 AM PDT by lurk
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