I knew a Guy in JR HIGH that told the one sitting next to Him at Lunch to stop stealing Tater Tots off the tray or he was going to get stabbed with the fork.
The Idiot reached for another Tot and got the fork in the back of his hand. He started screaming “you stabbed me!”
The reply was “I warned you” and then He calmly held down the Tot Theives’ hand and pulled out the fork, wiped it off and went back to eating.
It never happened again.
good Lord! What did you do? Go to gladiator school :)
Donut shop counter guy: “YOU SHOT ME!!!!!” Christopher: “It happens....” (A little Sopranos there!)
“Oh YEAH!? Well FORK you!”
My high school history teacher told the story of how Joe Stalin was kicked out of the seminary school. Some guy reached for the loaf of bread in front of young Joe, and Joe nailed his hand to the table with his knife.
Not sure if that is true or not.