Posted on 02/01/2016 8:24:02 AM PST by Citizen Zed
Edited on 02/01/2016 8:35:51 AM PST by Admin Moderator. [history]
Black History Month is a time for everyone to celebrate the contributions that African Americans have made to the world. It presents a rare opportunity for my friends of different ethnicities (particularly the White ones) to shut up and focus on the greatness of MY heritage for a change. For the past 5 years, I have done a Black History Month blog every February. Sometimes it results in awesome things happening, such as being featured on The View. And sometimes the results are less awesome, like getting banned from Facebook for a month. Nevertheless, this humble little indie recording artist feels it her duty to honor this special time of the year. So in the spirit of Black Excellence, here are 10 things that my White friends better not ruin during Black History Month:
1. The 2016 Presidential Election. So... we're just gonna act like that thing on his head is hair? Aside from the fact that he's shown himself to be a sexist bigot, if Donald Trump isn't even perceptive enough to notice a seagull nesting on his head then how the hell can he run a country? Only the most racist and player-hatery of my White homies could possibly be pro-Trump. And if that's what you're about, then that's your business. But don't ruin the Presidential Elections for the rest of us this month. Keep it to yourself until March. Let us enjoy our last Black History Month with a Black president in peace.
2. Slicked-down baby hair. To your people, laid edges are a fashion trend. To my people, gelled down baby hair is a way of life. If your mother has never tamed the edges of your hair with an old tooth brush and Pro Style brown gel, then chances are you are appropriating an aesthetic that doesn't belong to you. Any other time of the year it wouldn't be that big of a deal, I'd just give you a judgey raised eyebrow and keep it moving. But during Black History Month, cut it out. It's the culturally sensitive thing to do
3. "Urban Tie Caps."Â Hey... That is not an urban tie cap. It's a wave cap. Otherwise known as a cheap ass durag.
4. Rap challenges. Every few months a new rap challenge pops up, such as the #GeekedUpChallenge. Â If you have actual rap skills, then go forth and make my people proud, White buddy. But if you don't... Chill. Let's see no more of this foolishness until after February 28th.
5. Pretty much anything "urban" in general. The highest form of flattery is imitation, not mockery. So tell your grandma to sit her old ass down until March 1st. Thank you.
6. Award shows. The fact that #OscarsSoWhite is happening in 2016 should make all of us shake our heads. I mean, nobody is saying Black actors should be nominated for ALL of the awards. Just the ones they actually deserve. And it's cute that Fox believes that the opinions of a washed up Black actress who has been in one and a half good movies should speak for the entirety of all of Blackdom. But unfortunately, I do not recognize Stacey Dash as my lord and savior. So if you agree with her take on #OscarsSoWhite, keep it to yourself this month. Y'all can keep Stacey Dash to yourselves until then, too.
7. Micheal Jackson. When the news broke that a White British actor named Joseph Fiennes was gonna be playing Michael Jackson in a 9/11 road trip comedy show, a lot of people were pissed. I mean... were there 0% Black actors available to audition for the role of one of the most iconic African American entertainers? Y'all already got Raven Symone, now you're gonna ruin Michael Jackson for us, too??? Of course, there were some folks who did not understand the outrage. Those folks are stupid. Don't be like those folks, at least not during Black History Month.
8. Black Pride moments. For some reason, whenever Black people are proactive about our representation in the media, there are always people who try to ruin it by taking our inclusion as an attack against them. I'm not going to explain the significance of underrepresented people seeing positive characters and images that they can relate to in the media. Instead, I'll say this: February is the shortest month of the year. That means you only need to shut the hell up for 28 days.
9. The Natural Hair movement. Seriously. Don't do this s*** again.
10. Black history. History tells people where they have been, which teaches them about their present and their future. The accomplishments of Black Americans are largely left out of educational curricula in many schools. Even if Black History Month is unimportant to you, there are many who learn a lot from it every year. So for the rest of the month, try not to ruin it for others. Unless you don't mind getting cussed out. In that case, bring it on.
Thanx in advance, White homies, for acknowledging these 10 rules during Black History Month. And for those of you who are offended, insulted, feeling left out, or experiencing any other degree of butthurt, feel free to drop a comment and I'll reply to it some time during White History Month... which is pretty much every month except February. Happy Black History Month!
They did teach about them when I went to school. Lord knows what they teach nowadays.
It is estimated that at least one hundred million native American people died from diseases prior to the European settlement of North America. Most never came in contact with a white person or even with a person who had come in contact with someone who had even seen or heard of white Europeans.
Most of North America was almost completely uninhabited by the time the pilgrims arrived.
I honestly don’t know if this is a parody or not. I think she’s trying to be funny. If she’s not, this is disturbing. If she is, its a bit banal.
Charlize Theron is a true African American. All the rest of the pigmented racists are just ghetto rats and thugs.
If ya can’t be just a plain American, then go back to the country ya gotta hyphen with. We don’t want ya with yer fro’s, droopy pants and inability to speak articulable English. Our crime rate and general IQ will all benefit.
Hmmm, it seems you are right about the Ethopians! I leaned something new today, thanks.
I think she should be honoring Anthony Johnson (1600-1670), a black colonial planter and entrepreneur who established a major facet of colonial society.
Someone's pretty bitter .... ROFL!!
Do not talk about Cotton gator, /sarc.
A majority of South Americans are WHITE. They are descendants of the Spanish and Portuguese conquerors and settlers of the continent.
Last I checked, people on the Iberian Peninsula where considered white Europeans. Southern Europeans to be sure, but WHITE non the less.
Some are of mixed race. Either European and Indian or European and African. They are Mestizo or Mulatto, like Obama and many, many, many, African Americans. Obama is NOT an American who is a descendant of slaves. He has no slave blood. As a matter of fact his African Tribe where actually slave holders.
Also ‘Hispanic’ isn't a nationality. Guatemalans do not call them selves Hispanic. They call themselves Guatemalan. Same goes for Brazilians, or Chileans.
It is neither. It is simply a more open month for bashing Whitey and all that he has wrought in the destruction of the noble ‘people of color’. That some how now includes white people from South America who claim that their foreign accent makes them somehow minorities.
Look no further than Jorge Ramos a white a blue eyed light haired WHITE guy who claims to be a ‘person of color’. The only color to describe Jorge is WHITE. The only other word would be translucent due to his incredible whiteness.
They seem to worry about their hair a lot.
Wonder why?
It is odd, but North American Indians never developed anything past stone arrows, bent wood and woven wicker baskets, and (in places) bark-coated canoes. Large dirt piles, in the few towns that built mounds in their flood plains, were their highest architecture outside of the mud-brick Indian pueblos up the canyon walls in a few places out west.
That’s it.
Mayan, Aztec, Inca all built with large and well-trimmed rock down south. Not everywhere of course, but in many large cities down there with a central religiously-controlled culture.
But up north? Nothing.
In Africa? South of Egypt, there is only ONE “tower” in ONE place across the entire continent. And NOTHING has EVER “come out of Africa” to advance ANY other culture. No invention, no writing, no mathematics, no weapons, no chemistry or physics or astronomy. No agriculture nor business.
it is odd.
It was a stern school (Scotland during WW II). Actually we didn’t have Kindergarten...straight into Primary 1. Did learn a bit of Latin, come to think of it, but all of it in hymns and responses to the Mass...not much of it flawless. I know I got a good whack by a pitiless Nun while singing the Tantum Ergo. I thought the last line was “no peace on earth in patria” instead of “nobis donet in patria”. Now in my advanced years, I still insert “no peace on earth” quietly for the hell of it, and get away with it.
If she has any white friends left after that ignorant diatribe, they must be bullying victims or just plain stupid.
“Micheal Jackson”? Maybe the name should be changed to “Ebonics Month”?
It does have an strange resemblance to a cow pie.
February: BLACKS HATIN’ on WHITES month...
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