Student said to the teacher, “If that’s one of your ‘quizies’, I’d hate to see one of your ‘testies’.
Mr. RR always makes me coffee in the morning because it is a commandment in the Bible. Hebrews.
Not really a pun.
I enjoy your posts. Thanks.
A Termite walks into a bar, and asks... “Is the bar tender here?”
A nervous wreck.
-PJ
for later forwarding to my pun-enjoying daughter
Mickey Mouse gives me Disney spells.
“How does it change many dyslexics to take a light bulb?”
A woman wasn’t looking where she was going and backed into an airplane propeller. Disaster.
Pret ty, pret ty good!
I found out my girl had a wooden leg, so I had to break it off.
I once spilled milk in my fridge and after a while it smelled like farts.
No damage done but it still smells like derrière.
Past, present and future walk into a bar. It was tense.
I was just about to tell a joke about time travel but you guys didn’t like it.....
I started getting claustrophobic in elevators.
I am now taking steps to avoid it
If a wild pig kills someone...
Does it means they were boared to death?
I broke up with my crosseyed girlfriend.
She was seeing other people on the side.
I know someone who lives on top of a bank. His assets over $10 million.
Dear friends,
Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.
Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much dough on half baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive role model for millions.
Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 350 for about 20 minutes.
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fantastic shutter speed that it is now possible to take a photograph of a woman with her mouth closed.