Skip to comments.Karl Rove Is the Father of Anna Nicole's Baby
Posted on 03/29/2007 6:36:28 AM PDT by SunSetSam
Karl Rove fathered Anna Nicole Smiths baby. In an unforgettable night fueled by alcohol, lust, a lion tamer outfit, a failed attempt to freebase "Sweettarts", an Al Franken blow-up doll and some crimes against nature with a very confused puffer fish, Karl fathered her child. I think we should all be ashamed of Mr. Rove (how much is she worth again?).
Now, admittedly, there is no crime in having sex with Anna Nicole Smith. If that were illegal most of the Western Hemispheres male population would be perp walked into a future of Federal incarceration that includes forced labor, strained peas and the sort of orange jumpsuit that even Elvis would consider garish. Whether or not there is a crime here, there is definitely something suspicious going on.
Karl Rove is a portly, yet healthy straight male capable of fathering children. Anna Nicoles sexuality pendulum had swung back to heterosexual for a time and they were both in and around the vicinity of North America when a currently anonymous sperm cell said Howdy Do to one of Annas eggs. So it is possible that Karl is the father.
Only a public hearing, with Karl under oath, will get to the bottom of the question about whether or not Mr. Rove got to the bottom of Ms. Smith.
On the face of it, the idea that Karl Rove would even be in the same room as the promiscuous Ms. Smith is ridiculous for two reasons. First Karl is a gentleman who is probably smart enough not to touch women of her sort without rubber gloves and Bactine handy. Second, Anna seems to have a thing for sleazy lawyers of the Ambulance Chaser variety. With that said, perhaps we should open hearings about where John Edwards was when Smiths latest offspring was conceived. This is where we are in the modern political climate though. Regardless of the issue, the Democrats want Karl Rove testifying under oath.
Whether or not a crime has been committed is completely irrelevant. It was not a crime to utter Valerie Plames name. Not only was she not a covert operative, but she spent most of her professional career doing everything short of wearing a button on her jacket that stated Ask me about my CIA job! to call attention to her position. This fact didnt matter. Liberals demanded that Rove testify in this case and giddily waited for an indictment to be handed down for the key Bush political advisor. There were nearly riots in blue states when even the Democrats, hand picked special prosecutor couldnt find a reason to go after Karl.
I heard, that in not wanting to miss jumping on a bandwagon, Hillary Clinton claimed paternity in this case... :)
News to me. I thought Hillary was the father of Anna's kid.
Rove wouldn't have impressed her with his RAP act.
Rove! You Magnificent Bastard!!
I only posted an excerpt, and am lost how to go back and edit this so it is listed as only an excerpt. HELP!!!!!
Karl Rove is their target. Get him under oath in front of cameras no matter what the cost.
Where were you on the night of January 16th? Who killed Cock Robin? Were you on the Grassy Knoll? What do you know about Pearl Harbor? Have you ever worked for NASA Space Shuttle program?............
Only the mods have that power.
He has more than a few good points....
Darn, I thought fur sure it was Ted Kennedy !!!!
Dang, well the whole thing is pretty good.
Is he still capable?
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