Posted on 01/07/2010 9:51:07 AM PST by big black dog
Y’know, I think I know what my problem is, and why I am rubbing some in the business the wrong way.
I am a very low maintenance customer. Other than asking for jalapeno’s on the side with the occasional mexican meal, I just want to choose my food, get it in a reasonable time and while it’s still hot, and be able to pay for it relatively shortly after I complete the meal. If something sucks I either decide I will never eat there again or, if it is a place I frequent, I’ll guess someone just made a mistake. I don’t complain.
There is very little a waitperson needs to do for me that is not their very basic reason for being employed in the first place.
It is because I do not like being waited on. It is disrespectful to the person doing the “waiting”. My sister and her Husband are VERY rich. When I visit their home or we spend a week with them on their 115’ yacht I always make the mistake of “overly befriending” the staff and not letting them wait on me. I’m getting better at it but it always makes me uncomfortable.
I would love to have a button at my table so that I would only be “bothered” by a wait person when I really need something. I’d hardly ever press the button, would be allowed to converse with my friends uninterrupted, and would be happy to pay a tip based on how many times I pressed the button, and how fast it was responded to.
Not at all.
You said you don't like to tip.
That's true. I hate it. I wish it would go away.
I said, then get take-out. You said what if I like their food and want to sit down. (I believe that implies that you wanted to sit down and didn't want to tip.).
Well, I do *want* to go to a sit down restaurant without tipping. I always want to stop paying taxes. It's not going to happen in my lifetime. If you mean that I stated an intention NOT to tip, then you're simply wrong.
My confusion is, if I am willing to tip (even though it's an abyssmal practice), why should I feel obligated to avoid restaurants where it's expected?
When I lived in the State of Washington, we had a favorite Bistro owned by a hard working Lebanese. I’ve seen him chase a customer down the street, yelling, when the guy turned back the remains of a spinach salad (one leaf left) and demanded that it be removed from the bill, saying. “I forgot that I don’t like spinach!”
Another favorite ploy that angered him was when a customer would ask, “Could you please substitute smoked salmon for the rice pilaff?”
He’d say to my husband, “Smoked salmon is $2 a lb. Rice pilaff is a nickel. Does that ba—t-rd think I’m crazy?”
Give me a break. Except for fine restaurants, most bartenders know little else than how to pop a top off and mix a hi-alcohol shot for drunk college kids.
And btw, I was a bartender many years ago. I earned more in 4 months of partying and carousing with the customers than my annual income for my first 5 years with a “real job”.
Sounds like a selfish shmuck. I guarantee he’s eaten and drank other people’s bodily fluids many times unwittingly...
The basic premise of a free market is an exchange by a willing buyer and a willing seller.
The seller no longer is willing to provide a enjoyable venue for you to hang out — without what he believes would be your fair contribution to providing such an opportunity that you obviously take advantage of.
Most people tip what is customarily expected, but if they don’t have an enjoyable experience, don’t return every week — as you do because you’re getting a fantastic deal. But with anything in society, somebody has to pay for it — and if everyone is not contributing their fair share, then those venues disappear. If all the customers are like you, they go under.
A lot of people expect a lot, if not everything, and think the object is to get without providing anything in return. But somebody has to provide them — or do their small part, rather than demanding they should get something for nothing, because the other guy is not as “smart” as you are.
The general rule is that if you don’t want to tip, don’t go out and eat/drink, or go to places where tipping is not expected. If tipping is expected and how the operation works, that’s what everyone is expected to help out in — even if it’s not stated in a contract.
Most people give each other the benefit of the doubt — until one has a proven track record of intent, and if your clear intention is never to tip ever, then that owner knows you well enough to calculate whether you are an asset or a liability to his business.
For any business, besides the money, the quality of their customers, is what gives them high repute and standing in the community, and they are validated by those whose opinions matter.
To force oneself on others on your own self-determined favorable terms, is the reason people don’t want to be associated with you, and do business with you.
There was a new chain restaurant opened probably a year ago relatively close to my house. The first time I went there the service and the food were spectacularly bad. You can expect that for the first few weeks there would be issues, but this was past that time. What infuriated me the most was that the high school to college age employees had plenty of time to stand, laugh and gossip, but not to do their jobs.
I left no tip, and sent a blow-by-blow description of my experience to corporate HQ. They sent me a gift certificate, I went back a few months later, and the service and food were both very good. I think I tipped 25%.
Tips are one of the ways we leave feedback for a job done. I pay $40 for a haircut, same guy I've been going to for 20 years; I always have a $5 in my pocket for him.
I went to a waterfront restaurant before Christmas, ran up a bill of about $115; the waitress was wonderful and the food was great. I think I rounded the ticket up to $160.
I've worked for tips as a waiter. I'm on a professional haitus right now and I'm working as a dispatcher for an airport shuttle company. Drivers depend upon tips to supplement their income.
I have no guilt when I answer an outsized sense of entitlement with a $0 tip. That sends a message, also...one I'm happy to explain if asked. The only moral and rational response to an inappropriate sense of expectation is, "No."
Those on this thread who emphasize "customary" ignore "voluntary"...yet, I'm sure they understand the difference between a 10% tithe and 10% sent to the IRS.
Who can figure...
You might not be aware -- but there's lots of types of bars between fine restaurants & college bars. You may want to reconsider where you hang out. The bar/restaurant I worked at required a lot more including, as mentioned before, dealing with drunken a-holes.
And btw, I was a bartender many years ago. I earned more in 4 months of partying and carousing with the customers than my annual income for my first 5 years with a “real job”.
In other words, you were a crappy employee?
Wow.
No matter what you think about tipping, that is tacky and completely rude.
I am glad your husband gave her something in private.
If you don’t like something, you tell the server immediately, not wait until the end. I think some people say things like that just so they can get a comped meal, and it is really rude.
If you are willing to tip (graciously or not) there is no problem.
>>How is that?<<
Try refusing service to a black man. I dare ya.
Cheap F***.
Nobody believes that tending bar is the path to wealth and prosperity.
That’s awful. I am shocked the other folks at the table didn’t leave their own tips.
Good waiters shouldn’t be hassling you too often. They should be looking for empty stuff (glasses to refill, plates to take away) and about half way through should ask how your food is, but other than that unless you engage them in conversation should be leaving you alone. I’m not a chatty guy, so I’m totally in alignment on the not wanting to be hassled, but I do want my glasses refilled.
However, one guy who goes on a regular basis to the same restaurant, always stiffing the hired help, is a jerk and deserves to be 86'd.
And what reason would a restaurant have for banning a black man from their premises?
There is very little a waitperson needs to do for me that is not their very basic reason for being employed in the first place.
Same here. I virtually never complain or send anything back (it has to be something absolutely inexcusable, like chicken that's bloody & raw inside), and I'm sometimes kind of embarrassed when my wife does, or when she makes some special request. Accuracy and keeping liquid in my glass are pretty much the only things I want from a server.
No, life isn’t.
But, that isn’t really the point.
I always tip. But I have sometimes wondered if this makes sense when I am in a smaller ethnic restaurant where the waitperson is obviously the owner or a member of the owner’s family.
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