How old are you now?
You might tell your daughter that you love her (if you do), that whatever she and her mother think, you are concerned for her welfare (if you are) and that she puts herself in a vulnerable position if she lives with someone she isn't married to...you might tell her that in some ways, she will always be your little girl, and that you feel protective, as any normal father does...
Nah. Never mind. With your pugnacious attitude, you'd probably just end up making things worse.
Judith you make it all sound so simple. Kind of like Ross Perot. Just pop the hood and fix it. And yes there is no way around it, I am venting my frustation. I am airing my dirty laundry.