2006 Women of Freerepublic Calendars Now Available (very vain)

PA Times | 12/30/05 | Pissant Hefner

[pissant]

Eventhough last years calendar nearly caused a stampede to the bookstores as well as a highly entertaining catfight, here at the Pissant Exotic Entertainment Publishers (PEEP), we've decided to issue the 2006 version for public consumption.

Of course, only a sample of the photographs available on the Calendar are presented here, to enhance the sales.

Feel free to contribute your nominations for freeperette calendar girls, and they will be considered for the next release. Enjoy

[pissant]

January: Long Elegant Legs---LEL was selected because her screen name actually matches her attributes. And she was selected for January, because when you look around town or the office, most women are wrapped up like Eskimos this time of year, so LEL is a refreshing reminder on your wall of what lies beneath. Her hobbies include pole dancing, needlepoint and collecting used dentures.

February: PaulaB -- Paula was selected not only for her bubbly personality and good looks, but also for her ability to put men in their place. She went toe to toe with Mr. Jeeves and HitmanNY and came away unscathed. Though seemingly sweet and mild mannered, there is a sharp spade tail hiding under her skirt. Hobbies include Santaria and Spin the Bottle

March: Teenyelliott -- Despite having extra L's and T's in her screen name, Teeny was selected to bring balance. While the other calendar girls are all known for their intellect, Teeny was selected based on her prowess in bar fights. She might have a few chipped teeth and a couple of knife wound scars, but few women will dance on the bar topless for the price of a Pabst. Hobbies include stalking liberals and making mittens from cat fur.

April: Motormouth--MM was selected for obvious asthetic reasons (see below) but her most endearing quality is her ability to drink all comers under the table. An unfortunate side effect is that she usually will walk away with your wallet as well. On the bright side, the more she drinks the faster and louder she talks, and has made a collection of tapes available to keep sleepy drivers awake and irritated. Hobbies include cooking endangered species and bum rolling.

[pissant]

PING

[ken5050]

You have waaaaaaay to much free time, dude...but it's a blast..

[Dashing Dasher]

Where am I?

[teenyelliott]

Oh, thanks, not one nice word, butthole.

And that girl is a dog.

I never knew there was so much underlying hatred in our relationship, pissy!

[cripplecreek]

"PING"


Schwing!

[jjmcgo]

What happened to the link to teenyelliott's jpg?
Where is Dashing Dasher?
OMG, is that really PaulaB? 'Cause I want one.

[pissant]

Apparently I do!

[Dashing Dasher]

Where is Dashing Dasher!?

I want a LONG month! With plenty of sunshine!

Dammit!

;-)

[JimWforBush]

April: Motormouth--MM was selected for obvious asthetic reasons (see below) but her most endearing quality is her ability to drink all comers under the table. An unfortunate side effect is that she usually will walk away with your wallet as well. On the bright side, the more she drinks the faster and louder she talks, and has made a collection of tapes available to keep sleepy drivers awake and irritated. Hobbies include cooking endangered species and bum rolling.

OMG LMAO, she's tried to drink me under the table and failed.

[Dashing Dasher]

Shhhh...

A woman doesn't like her secrets given away.

[bmwcyle]

June?

[Hemingway's Ghost]

Very funny, Pissant!

[motormouth]

He's just got his nighty in a knot, cuz he knows I can. ;o)

[jaydubya2]

Very Good Mr. Pissant. I like. You better take care of Dasher, though.

[Michael Goldsberry]

May: Dashing Dasher -- DD was selected for her sense of humor and charming wit. She will occasionally scuffle with certain FReepers, and their ancestors usually feel it! Hobbies include upside down nekkid flying and squashing trolls.

[Dashing Dasher]

Can I watch?

[wolfcreek]

OMG, is that really PaulaB? 'Cause I want one.

Yes, not quite what you would expect but, what the hell do I know!

[Dashing Dasher]

SMOOOOOCH!!!

Thank you for remembering me.


Sniffle...

[Dashing Dasher]

;-)