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Your Blonde Moments
SkyNews (U.K.) ^ | 2/9/06 | Staff

Posted on 02/09/2006 8:01:24 AM PST by Millee

It's been a week for utter stupidity.

First, Nick Flynn tripped over his shoelaces and smashed three very expensive Qing vases at a museum in Cambridge.

Last night the Everton goalkeeper Richard Wright was injured after tripping over a sign telling players not to practice in the Stamford Bridge goalmouth at Chelsea.

He did not make the FA Cup fourth round replay and Everton were hammered 4-1.

And finally, a Land Rover driver admitted to a "blonde moment" after driving her car into a lake.

"One minute I was parking the car, the next I was in the water. I just had a blonde moment," she said.

So what's your worst "blonde moment"? What's the most stupid, embarrassing or humiliating thing you have ever done?

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Please include your name and where you are writing from. But if you don't, we won't blame you!

Here are some of your memorable moments:

I was driving to a friend's house one day wondering why my feet felt so uncomfortable. When I got out of the car I noticed I had the shoes on the wrong feet. Ruth, London

Whilst watching Palestinian police firing rubber bullets at protesters on 'News night' my girlfriend (Brunette) asked me if "rubber bullets hurt more than real ones". I kid you not. Jay Baxter

Hmmm Rather embarrassing!! Was in a club talking to club Dj Tall Paul and ask..Why do they call you Tall Paul?? (he's over 6ft 5in) Tee hee Andrea Cox

I cant believe Im telling some1 this..... but I was looking on the internet to purchase a used car. The usual facts were stated, green, red, 40k, 80k, 165k, alloys, mettalic paint, etc. I couldnt believe my surprise when some1 actually stated that they were... as the previous owner... a black lady. I thought that extremelly irrellevant. I photocopied it, brought it home to the 5 members of my family and told them to listen to this for nonsense.... "opel tigra 60k alloys black lady owner electric sunroof" Get it now.... they all just BURST out laughin. Morto. Olivia the blonde (yes uve guessed it), Limerick, Ireland

A couple of weeks ago I was at my parents' house, where my mother was telling my girlfriend about one of her elderly neighbours who had a glass eye. Later in the car going home she asked me if glass eyes were really made of glass. I told her that one day they probably were, but now a days you could probably get them made of anything. I could see her mulling this over. She then turned to me and said "?.and can you see through these glass eyes?" The `are you serious` look on my face answered the question for her, to which she immediately said she was only joking??but she wasn't. Michael Newton Swinton, Manchester

My blond friend Michelle once asked an American friend "Is America the Norwich side or the Wales side of England!!" Enough said. Emma, Yorkshire Advertisement Advertisement

On a family day out, we were following some friends out toward Nottingham, my wife was on her mobile to the Female passenger of the other car when the signal faded. She said "Get closer to them". I nearly crashed the car laughing. Tony Hinks, Lincoln

I was chatting to a friend of mine while walking down Gower Street in London, after a night out. I wasn't looking where I was going. I turned to face the front and, as soon as I had, walked straight into a parking meter and knocked out my front tooth. Lindsay Wright

Just last week I left my laptop outside my house. I set the laptop bag down on the pavement so that I could reverse my car out of the driveway (it's very tight and one has to "climb" in). I then just drove off! Later that day I got a note through the door from someone saying they'd picked it up. I got it back that day, proving there still nice people in this world. Paul

I went for a meal with my boyfriend and his brother. My boyfriend and his brother ordered a large steak each, I had the chicken. When the food came the steaks were huge but both being men with big appetites they managed to polish them off to my amazement. When the bill came it was passed to me for a joke (my boyfriend's brother was paying). I looked at the bill and said "oh look, it says "well done" for eating your all your steak". He said, "no Rachel, that's how I asked for it cooking". I wanted the ground to swallow me up! Rachel, Leeds

I once picked up my sister from the train station. She got out of the train station opened the back passenger door and slammed it shut. So I sped off, thinking I looked really cool in my new car. I asked her how her day was and whether it was good and finally what was wrong as she wasn't replying. It wasn't until I turned around to look in the back that I discovered she wasn't there at all! She had put her bags in the back and was coming round to sit in the front when I chose that moment to drive off kamikaze style. Needless to say I was mortified as there was also a long queue of black cabs running along the platform and they must have seen it all... I waited for her at the end of the road. Ghazala, London

My highly intelligent, politics grad girlfriend who happens to be blonde, came out with a classic a couple of months ago. Whilst being teased for various prior blonde moments she uttered the classic, "It's not my fault, I'm just not the sharpest spoon in the drawer......". Evidently this is true. This also follows her recently telling me to "Bite the bull by the horns" Marvellous. All this, and more, while being far more intelligent than almost everybody else I know, myself included. I guess that's what having blonde hair does to you every now and then. Lee

Should we be calling these "blonde" moments? Frequently associating negative experiences, even if humorous, with a biological characteristic is reinforcing a stereotype and can be traumatic. Describing them as "lapses in concentration" or "Doh" moments (Homer Simpson) may be better. Just a thought. Hans, London


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Not too long ago, I noticed as we were on our way to church, that I was wearing a blue pump and a black pump. Different styles, different heels, etc.
1 posted on 02/09/2006 8:01:25 AM PST by Millee
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To: PaulaB; Dashing Dasher; Jersey Republican Biker Chick; najida; teenyelliott; Maximus of Texas; ...

ping!


2 posted on 02/09/2006 8:02:39 AM PST by Millee (The Constitution was meant for us to live under, not be paralyzed by, in the face of death. - Sowell)
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To: Millee

One day bragging to another admin assistant about how smart I was, I felt something rubbing against my ankles. I looked down...

my slip had slipped down and was around my feet.

I'm so smart!


3 posted on 02/09/2006 8:07:47 AM PST by peacebaby (I'm not overwhelmed; I'm just the right amount of whelmed.)
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To: peacebaby

LOL!


4 posted on 02/09/2006 8:10:15 AM PST by Millee (The Constitution was meant for us to live under, not be paralyzed by, in the face of death. - Sowell)
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To: Millee

First time I went snow skiing (25 years ago). Went to sit on the lift and missed!!


5 posted on 02/09/2006 8:10:29 AM PST by Auntbee (I have become comfortably numb.)
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To: Auntbee

That's the part that scares me, Auntbee!


6 posted on 02/09/2006 8:12:13 AM PST by peacebaby (I'm not overwhelmed; I'm just the right amount of whelmed.)
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To: Millee

The first time I faxed a document, I made copies for my files!


7 posted on 02/09/2006 8:12:29 AM PST by colorcountry (Currently not in the process of becoming a God!)
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To: peacebaby

LOL!


8 posted on 02/09/2006 8:13:16 AM PST by MontanaBeth (Never under estimate the enemy.)
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To: colorcountry

When I struck a match next to a plastic-explosives bunker.


9 posted on 02/09/2006 8:15:14 AM PST by johnny7 (“Iuventus stultorum magister”)
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To: Millee
I am trying to think of some specific ones but I have had a number of them through the years. My biggest blonde moments come when I am looking at my sons Algebra. Thank goodness is father is an algebra whiz because I am not

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10 posted on 02/09/2006 8:15:48 AM PST by PaulaB
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To: Millee

One sleepy morning many years ago I began brushing my teeth with Brylcreem. The upside was my teeth stayed in place all day.


11 posted on 02/09/2006 8:17:00 AM PST by Mike Bates (Irish Alzheimer's victim: I only remember the grudges.)
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To: PaulaB

I'm still asleep...reading your post, at first I thought your son's name was Algebra!

Blonde moment
blonde moment
blonde moment


12 posted on 02/09/2006 8:18:34 AM PST by peacebaby (I'm not overwhelmed; I'm just the right amount of whelmed.)
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To: Mike Bates

lol....


13 posted on 02/09/2006 8:19:51 AM PST by peacebaby (I'm fixin' to think about contemplating commencing to begin to start to get ready to work)
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To: Auntbee

LOL!


14 posted on 02/09/2006 8:20:37 AM PST by Dashing Dasher (Happy Fierce Allegiance Day!)
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To: Mike Bates

15 posted on 02/09/2006 8:21:05 AM PST by Millee (The Constitution was meant for us to live under, not be paralyzed by, in the face of death. - Sowell)
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To: Millee

My 23-year old daughter is so ditzy, I always say that under those dark roots of hers, she really is blonde.


16 posted on 02/09/2006 8:27:45 AM PST by peacebaby (I'm fixin' to think about contemplating commencing to begin to start to get ready to work)
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To: Millee

Back in my younger, crazier days I got up one morning to get ready for work and packed my lunch while half awake.

Imagine my surprise when, at lunch that day with several co-workers, I pulled an ice cold Budweiser out of my lunchbox to drink.

Took me a while to live that one down.


17 posted on 02/09/2006 8:30:21 AM PST by day10 (Whenever you come near the human race, there's layers and layers of nonsense.)
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To: Millee

"I voted for the 87 billion before I voted against it."


18 posted on 02/09/2006 8:31:54 AM PST by YouPosting2Me
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To: day10

Nothing wrong with that!!!


19 posted on 02/09/2006 8:34:25 AM PST by Auntbee (I have become comfortably numb.)
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To: Millee

Spent 10 minutes looking for the rewind button on my (new) DVD player.


20 posted on 02/09/2006 8:35:04 AM PST by investigateworld (Abortion stops a beating heart)
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To: day10

Man #1: Beer?
Man #2: No, too early in the mornin'.
Man #1: OK then, Scotch?


21 posted on 02/09/2006 8:36:53 AM PST by peacebaby (I'm fixin' to think about contemplating commencing to begin to start to get ready to work)
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To: Millee

About 3 weeks ago, we stopped for gas, my husband got out, started the pump and after a few minutes, got back in the car. I thought he was finished, so I drove off. Turns out, he got in the car to get out of the cold and I drove off with the nozzle still attached. Luckily, it came out, but gas was spewing everywhere on the ground.

Truly embarrassing.


22 posted on 02/09/2006 8:37:46 AM PST by conservativebabe ("I came here to chew bubble gum and kick @ss, and I'm all out of bubble gum")
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To: conservativebabe

And expensive! - LOL!!


23 posted on 02/09/2006 8:39:05 AM PST by Millee (The Constitution was meant for us to live under, not be paralyzed by, in the face of death. - Sowell)
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To: Millee

Here's one more horrifying than funny.

I sent my husband an e-mail while he was out of town once, b!tching up a storm about his annoying parents who were staying at our house for a visit at the time. I sent it to his parents by mistake!

I realized it, right after I hit send. It was funny trying to apologize to them after that. My wicked-evil father-in-law forwarded it to my husband with comments, no doubt trying to get my hubby pissed at me. Joke was on FIL from hell though, because my hubby happens to agree with me.


24 posted on 02/09/2006 8:41:36 AM PST by conservativebabe ("I came here to chew bubble gum and kick @ss, and I'm all out of bubble gum")
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To: day10

Even though I have had every color of the rainbow when it comes to hair color..LOL MY blonde moments comes to my KEYS! and my glasses! now I have multiple keys and glasses for every room so I don't have to worry about blonde moments.


25 posted on 02/09/2006 8:42:13 AM PST by laney (*never ride your horse faster than your guardian angel can fly*)
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To: Millee
My first time on a legal drag strip, rolled up to the water box for a burn out (street legal vehicle) and proceeded to do such in first gear. In about half a second, I pegged 8 grand on my tach and threw a water pump belt that tore my radiator hose 3/4 through.

The staging lane that I used had to be closed off for 20 minutes to clean up the coolant mess.

I had to be pushed back into the staging area to put my belt back on, duct tape the radiator hose and limp back home.

**Lesson not known at time: Do burn outs in third gear (auto trans).

26 posted on 02/09/2006 8:42:53 AM PST by Deguello
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To: conservativebabe

OMG - I would have been mortified!


27 posted on 02/09/2006 8:43:03 AM PST by Millee (The Constitution was meant for us to live under, not be paralyzed by, in the face of death. - Sowell)
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To: Millee

Two words: Ross Perot.

:/


28 posted on 02/09/2006 8:43:22 AM PST by Michael Goldsberry (Lt. Bruce C. Fryar USN 01-02-70 Laos)
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To: conservativebabe
LOL...I did this once years ago myself. In my particular situation, the hose had a disconnect about 7 feet from the nozzle. I noticed it when I got home a couple of blocks later. It's pretty embarrassing walking back into the store with a nozzle and about 7 feet of hose with you...oh well, it gave everyone a good laugh, and it never happened again. Cover Up
29 posted on 02/09/2006 8:43:41 AM PST by EX52D (They say that anger is just love disappointed...)
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To: Millee

I was. Let's just say, I ALWAYS check the sender now before sending e-mails! LOL! What an idiot I am !


30 posted on 02/09/2006 8:44:21 AM PST by conservativebabe ("I came here to chew bubble gum and kick @ss, and I'm all out of bubble gum")
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To: EX52D

ROFL! You actually took the hose back?!?!?! Haaaa, haaaa!

I have tears in my eyes!


31 posted on 02/09/2006 8:45:41 AM PST by conservativebabe ("I came here to chew bubble gum and kick @ss, and I'm all out of bubble gum")
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To: day10
I would have taunted my co-workers with it as I drank it lovingly.

But, that's just me! ;o)

32 posted on 02/09/2006 8:45:48 AM PST by Millee (The Constitution was meant for us to live under, not be paralyzed by, in the face of death. - Sowell)
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To: conservativebabe

I sure did, it would have been on my conscience, and I'll do just about anything to give people a good laugh.


33 posted on 02/09/2006 8:48:09 AM PST by EX52D (They say that anger is just love disappointed...)
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To: Millee; day10

I would have snuck a few drinks from that bad boy in the bathroom or something.


34 posted on 02/09/2006 8:48:39 AM PST by conservativebabe ("I came here to chew bubble gum and kick @ss, and I'm all out of bubble gum")
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To: day10

LOL now that is funny


35 posted on 02/09/2006 8:49:53 AM PST by PaulaB
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To: Millee

Another blonde moment:

In college, my best friend and I went to the same school and we had gone home for the weekend. I was supposed to pick her up on Monday morning to drive back to school (it was only a 2 hours drive). I was about half-way back, when I realized that I forgot to pick her up.

She got back later that day, after taking the bus. She was soooooo p!ssed at me. We laugh about it now.


36 posted on 02/09/2006 8:51:13 AM PST by conservativebabe ("I came here to chew bubble gum and kick @ss, and I'm all out of bubble gum")
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To: Millee; Dashing Dasher; najida
Aw, man I have so MANY! I'm a natural born klutz and I ALWAYS have an audience.

Like one morning at work a few years ago, I tripped over a power strip with a hot cup of coffee in my hand, fell, and the coffee went up all over my face, hair and the shoulders of the shirt I was wearing. AND it stung my face.

And yep...I had quite an audience for that one.

I had to go home to change clothes, wash my face and wash the coffee out of a large hank of my hair.

That's just one of many. (sigh...)

37 posted on 02/09/2006 8:55:25 AM PST by Allegra (Suffering from a Malady Known as "Troll Fatigue")
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To: conservativebabe
Joke was on FIL from hell though, because my hubby happens to agree with me.

True sign of a happy marriage, when you side with each other instead of your parents. Good for you both!

38 posted on 02/09/2006 8:55:39 AM PST by Dashing Dasher (Happy Fierce Allegiance Day!)
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To: Allegra

You poor thing. That must have sucked.


39 posted on 02/09/2006 8:56:38 AM PST by conservativebabe ("I came here to chew bubble gum and kick @ss, and I'm all out of bubble gum")
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To: Millee; Jersey Republican Biker Chick; najida; PaulaB; EX52D; teenyelliott; peacebaby; ...

Many of you are already here - but I'd love to hear about your.... ahem... Blonde Moments....


40 posted on 02/09/2006 8:56:43 AM PST by Dashing Dasher (Happy Fierce Allegiance Day!)
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To: Millee

Ok, stupid I'm sure, but my blonde moment (at least the first thing that comes to my mind) is when I came home from church one Sunday and had left my bible on top of the car (like who hasn't done this).

What's cool though is that the rack on the top of the car, had kept the bible from falling off the car and all my notes/papers were still in the bible because the it was facing the opposite direction of the wind.

I thought it was pretty cool...


41 posted on 02/09/2006 8:56:59 AM PST by MadCharity ("Hindsight is not wisdom, and second guessing is not a strategy." Go GW!!!)
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To: Dashing Dasher

RE: your tagline, is FA back?


42 posted on 02/09/2006 8:58:13 AM PST by Millee (The Constitution was meant for us to live under, not be paralyzed by, in the face of death. - Sowell)
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To: Dashing Dasher

Well, Dasher it wasn't always that way. It took several years for me to get my hubby to see them for what they are. Course, the same thing could be said about me and my parents. Comes a time when you grow up and realize they aren't exactly the people you thought they were. But, we love them just the same.


43 posted on 02/09/2006 8:58:15 AM PST by conservativebabe ("I came here to chew bubble gum and kick @ss, and I'm all out of bubble gum")
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To: Michael Goldsberry
Two words: Ross Perot.

YOU VOTED FOR ROSS PEROT!?

Say it aint' so, Goldie!

44 posted on 02/09/2006 8:58:37 AM PST by Dashing Dasher (Happy Fierce Allegiance Day!)
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To: Dashing Dasher

I have lots, but I'm in a short sentence mode today :)


45 posted on 02/09/2006 8:58:45 AM PST by najida (Going through my second childhood for the third time.)
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To: conservativebabe
I sent my husband an e-mail while he was out of town once, b!tching up a storm about his annoying parents who were staying at our house for a visit at the time. I sent it to his parents by mistake!

YIKES! LOL

46 posted on 02/09/2006 8:59:02 AM PST by Allegra (Suffering from a Malady Known as "Troll Fatigue")
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To: Allegra

You drank the water at Eeeeek's Casa didn't ya ......:o)


47 posted on 02/09/2006 8:59:08 AM PST by Squantos (Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet. ©)
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To: MadCharity

Divine protection


48 posted on 02/09/2006 8:59:13 AM PST by conservativebabe ("I came here to chew bubble gum and kick @ss, and I'm all out of bubble gum")
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To: Millee
I went for a meal with my boyfriend and his brother. My boyfriend and his brother ordered a large steak each, I had the chicken. When the food came the steaks were huge but both being men with big appetites they managed to polish them off to my amazement. When the bill came it was passed to me for a joke (my boyfriend's brother was paying). I looked at the bill and said "oh look, it says "well done" for eating your all your steak". He said, "no Rachel, that's how I asked for it cooking". I wanted the ground to swallow me up! Rachel, Leeds

Of course, the true blonde moment in here is ordering a steak well done.

SD

49 posted on 02/09/2006 9:00:18 AM PST by SoothingDave
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To: Squantos; Eaker; humblegunner
You drank the water at Eeeeek's Casa didn't ya ......:o)

Actually, last time I was at Eeeeek's, I drank all of humblegunner's beer.

Every last one of 'em.

That's what 'Gunner got for not showing up.

50 posted on 02/09/2006 9:01:07 AM PST by Allegra (Suffering from a Malady Known as "Troll Fatigue")
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