Posted on 12/30/2007 11:47:36 AM PST by Robbin
People can be rotten. And, I warn my son — watch out for women. WE can be really, really bad.
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What I have found is that people with good spouses don’t understand why a man or woman would leave. They can’t comprehend the terrible things a bad man or woman can do. Since I am now married to a good woman who was married to a bad man I have compassion and understanding that many married people, married people with good spouses, cannot possibly have.
I have discovered that mostly you have to love someone before you hate them, or they have to have done something to someone you love. A spouse is in a unique position to be either loved or hated.
It is of course wrong to hate people but it happens, when it does you don’t have to be stupid and kill them.
Most of us have probably had something done to us by someone that we loved that made us want to do something really bad to them, but we knew it was wrong so we didn’t. I do not buy temporary insanity. I think it is easy to hate someone bad enough to not fear the consequences of wrong actions but I do not think that just because you do not fear the consequences that you should not have to face them.
There’s a thin line between love and hate.
Especially when a mate is involved.
It can make a person go crazy.
JAKraig: “What I have found is that people with good spouses don’t understand why a man or woman would leave. They can’t comprehend the terrible things a bad man or woman can do.”
I married very well, and you’re probably right. I’ve heard similar statements before, and I thank God nearly every day that I was lucky. I think there’s far more chance involved than most people are willing to admit. Most people pick a spouse from a very small group of people.
I am so terribly sorry you were put through that. I hate to say it, but I think women can be far more vindictive than men. I can tell you this. When I was in the military, I often saw airmen taken to the cleaners by their wives. Yes, a lot of the men were cheating on or neglecting their spouses, but the women often cleaned out every bank account and maxed out every credit line. The men often took it very, very hard. Men often try to hide the pain, but they do hurt...bad. More often than not, the wives filed the divorce papers, and the guys went through the process shell shocked.
My ex and his girlfriend planned for about a year.I lost my home, my step-daughter (he took her and put her in foster care) my livestock and my dogs. Everything I loved, gone. When this was all happening the Lacy Peterson thing was going on. I remember thinking that her husband was kinder than mine, her death was at least relatively fast. It’s five years down the road and I still feel that way.
Murder ends a life, adultery does not. Murder takes a person off this planet, can take a parent from a child or a child from a parent. Murder can kill the unborn. Marriages and families can survive adultery, but not murder.
I never treated adultery as no wrong at all. Yours was a terrible assumption.
I never cited an authority, and need not have. I gave my opinion, which, I will add, is quite logical, even in a spiritual sense.
There has to be more to the picture than simple adultry or abuse and in this case there was, i.e. it was a case of somebody (the husband) not recognizing that slavery had gone by the boards 135 years ago.
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