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The 4489 Calorie, 1.66 lb Burger
The Consumerist ^

Posted on 03/25/2009 7:41:12 AM PDT by Scythian



The West Michigan Whitecaps recently unveiled their new stadium menu and gloating at the top of it is the 4489 Calorie "Fifth Third Burger." This 1.66 pound piece of gastrointestinal wunder, named after team sponsor 5/3 Bank, costs $20 and feeds 1-4 people. If you eat it by yourself and finish it in one sitting, you get a free 5/3 tshirt. Said the team's marketing director, "It's something fun that people can understand."


TOPICS: Food
KEYWORDS: calories
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1 posted on 03/25/2009 7:41:12 AM PDT by Scythian
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To: Scythian

The food police have been alerted. Remember, you’re not smart enough to know what’s good for you.


2 posted on 03/25/2009 7:43:33 AM PDT by Slapshot68
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To: Scythian
MINE!
3 posted on 03/25/2009 7:43:35 AM PDT by null and void (We are now in day 65 of our national holiday from reality.)
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To: Scythian
...as good a place as any to insert the cult favorite into play:


4 posted on 03/25/2009 7:44:02 AM PDT by ErnBatavia (Here's hoping the Kennedy family trust is in deep....with Madoff)
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To: Scythian

Hey - it can’t be that bad! it’s got lettuce on it!


5 posted on 03/25/2009 7:45:28 AM PDT by PGR88
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To: Scythian

We occasionally go to Whitecaps games so this might be a good meal. The real challenge is eating it while sitting in a stadium seat.

Look delicious. Chili, beef, Nacho’s and hot sauce. The four basic food groups.


6 posted on 03/25/2009 7:45:57 AM PDT by cyclotic (Boy Scouts-Developing Leaders in a World of Followers.)
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To: Scythian
Looks Tasty and reasonable!

Unlike this monstrosity:


7 posted on 03/25/2009 7:46:05 AM PDT by SolidWood (Palin: "We do not want to becomes slaves of Washington.")
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To: Scythian

Looks tasty.


8 posted on 03/25/2009 7:46:12 AM PDT by Hegemony Cricket (The emporer has no pedigree.)
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To: PGR88

Although I like hamburgers myself I do not like the supersized greasy ones. In-n-out burger is more my style.


9 posted on 03/25/2009 7:46:54 AM PDT by Ev Reeman
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To: Scythian

My heart stopped just looking at it.

Oh, there it goes again - whew...


10 posted on 03/25/2009 7:47:11 AM PDT by reagan_fanatic (FOBO)
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To: Ev Reeman

Like the one at #7?


11 posted on 03/25/2009 7:47:50 AM PDT by SolidWood (Palin: "We do not want to becomes slaves of Washington.")
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To: Ev Reeman
In-n-out burger is more my style.

Double-Double at your service....post number 4 - it's one of our few reasons to go over to Indio.

12 posted on 03/25/2009 7:49:27 AM PDT by ErnBatavia (Here's hoping the Kennedy family trust is in deep....with Madoff)
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To: Scythian

It’s called the “Big Meghan”....


13 posted on 03/25/2009 7:53:43 AM PDT by Mac from Cleveland (How to make a small fortune in the Obama era--first, start off with a big fortune....)
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To: Scythian
Photobucket
14 posted on 03/25/2009 7:54:31 AM PDT by ETL (ALL the Obama-commie connections at my FR Home page: http://www.freerepublic.com/~etl/)
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To: Scythian

The “Department of Food” will ban this burger through nutritio-caloric cap and trade policies that will redistribute the caloric elements to more acceptable nutritional avenues ... like salads.


15 posted on 03/25/2009 7:54:48 AM PDT by spodefly (This is my tag line. There are many like it, but this one is mine.)
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To: Hegemony Cricket

Looks like a turd, covered in vomit, sitting on a bed of diarrhea. Bet it tastes great though, despite appearances!


16 posted on 03/25/2009 7:55:24 AM PDT by Dr. Bogus Pachysandra ( Ya can't pick up a turd by the clean end!)
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To: Scythian
Photobucket
17 posted on 03/25/2009 7:55:24 AM PDT by ETL (ALL the Obama-commie connections at my FR Home page: http://www.freerepublic.com/~etl/)
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To: Scythian

the thing should come with a plunger because you’ll need it later.


18 posted on 03/25/2009 7:55:38 AM PDT by MAD-AS-HELL (Hope and Change. Rhetoric embraced by the Insane - Obama, The Chump in Charge)
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To: ErnBatavia

Those double doubles you posted look more appetizing than the monster burger this thread is about. I’d rather have a regular sized burger that tastes great.


19 posted on 03/25/2009 7:57:24 AM PDT by mysterio
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To: ETL
More tasty treats here.
20 posted on 03/25/2009 7:57:55 AM PDT by a_screen_name
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To: Scythian

21 posted on 03/25/2009 7:57:55 AM PDT by Skid Marx
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To: cyclotic

“Look delicious. Chili, beef, Nacho’s and hot sauce. The four basic food groups.”

Wrong! The four basic food groups are...

Salt, Sugar, Grease, and Alcohol.


22 posted on 03/25/2009 8:01:28 AM PDT by Beagle8U (Free Republic -- One stop shopping ....... It's the Conservative Super WalMart for news .)
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To: Scythian
Folks who eat that need to visit this place:

Heart Attack Gill

Home of the Quadruple Bypass Burger:

Here are the Waitresses, errr, nurses:


23 posted on 03/25/2009 8:01:48 AM PDT by Wyatt's Torch (I can explain it to you. I can't understand it for you.)
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To: Wyatt's Torch

You beat me to it. I love these fancy eatin' threads.

24 posted on 03/25/2009 8:07:05 AM PDT by Skid Marx
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To: Scythian

This should be illegal because I don’t really want to eat one.


25 posted on 03/25/2009 8:11:40 AM PDT by South Hawthorne (In Memory of my Dear Friend Henry Lee II)
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To: ErnBatavia

OMG! I sure wish in-n-out was on the east coast, too.

They’re the best.


26 posted on 03/25/2009 8:12:04 AM PDT by paulycy (BEWARE the LIBERAL/MEDIA Complex)
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To: ErnBatavia

Been 15 years since I was last living in LA—

I liked me some In-n-Out-your pic brought back memories.

Double-Double regular—or switch it up and get it “Animal-style”. Daddy like.

Only other fast food place I’d go to regularly in the LA area was Tommy’s Chiliburgers-a couple of those as a post-hangover meal would straighten out the kinks....

Then there was Der Wienerschnitzel—and El Pollo Loco...


27 posted on 03/25/2009 8:15:07 AM PDT by Mac from Cleveland (How to make a small fortune in the Obama era--first, start off with a big fortune....)
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To: Beagle8U
Wrong! The four basic food groups are...

Salt, Sugar, Grease, and Alcohol.

Chocolate's gotta be in there somewhere. Chocolate is essential!

28 posted on 03/25/2009 8:16:30 AM PDT by Allegra ( Never argue with an idiot. They bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.)
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To: Scythian

http://www.62andeven.com/

“It will cost you $15, but I have to think it is worth it, minus the trip to the cardiologist.The “Fifth Third Burger” is five-thirds of a pound of grilled hamburger, nacho cheese, chili, salsa, crunched tortilla chips, tomato and lettuce served on a special eight-inch sesame seed bun. The estimate it could feed a family of four.”


29 posted on 03/25/2009 8:16:41 AM PDT by fishtank (Until the GOP repents of supporting Bush, people will think they're just "bashing 0bama".)
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To: a_screen_name

Great Link. Healthful and delicious dinner ideas for all. And dessert as well.

30 posted on 03/25/2009 8:16:51 AM PDT by Skid Marx
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To: Scythian
Photobucket
31 posted on 03/25/2009 8:16:51 AM PDT by ETL (ALL the Obama-commie connections at my FR Home page: http://www.freerepublic.com/~etl/)
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To: Scythian
Photobucket
32 posted on 03/25/2009 8:19:22 AM PDT by ETL (ALL the Obama-commie connections at my FR Home page: http://www.freerepublic.com/~etl/)
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To: Owl_Eagle

Ow, my cholesterol hurts...


33 posted on 03/25/2009 8:20:37 AM PDT by cups
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To: Allegra
“Chocolate's gotta be in there somewhere. Chocolate is essential! “

Chocolate is covered in the Sugar group. It should make up 1/4 of your total food intake.

34 posted on 03/25/2009 8:22:44 AM PDT by Beagle8U (Free Republic -- One stop shopping ....... It's the Conservative Super WalMart for news .)
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To: Scythian
... and for dessert we can have one of these:

Linky Thing: Bacon Explosion Instructions


35 posted on 03/25/2009 8:23:16 AM PDT by tx_eggman (Clinton was our first black President ... Obama is our first French President.)
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To: Wyatt's Torch
Photobucket
36 posted on 03/25/2009 8:24:20 AM PDT by ETL (ALL the Obama-commie connections at my FR Home page: http://www.freerepublic.com/~etl/)
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To: Dr. Bogus Pachysandra
Looks like a turd, covered in vomit, sitting on a bed of diarrhea.

You see a lot of those, do you?

37 posted on 03/25/2009 8:24:38 AM PDT by Petronski (For the next few years, Gethsemane will not be marginal. We will know that garden. -- Cdl. Stafford)
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To: ETL

No way are those thin patties half a pound each...


38 posted on 03/25/2009 8:24:54 AM PDT by Sloth (The tree of liberty desperately needs watering.)
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To: ErnBatavia

Ah, the In-N-Out Double-Double.

Best. Burger. Ever.


39 posted on 03/25/2009 8:25:50 AM PDT by ZirconEncrustedTweezers (Hitler was a great speaker too, and HE didn't need a teleprompter.)
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To: Sloth

You’re right. Didn’t notice that.


40 posted on 03/25/2009 8:26:11 AM PDT by ETL (ALL the Obama-commie connections at my FR Home page: http://www.freerepublic.com/~etl/)
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To: Scythian

Fifth Third’s Indiana regional office is 2 blocks down the street from my office. I think I’ll go to lunch there instead of the deli.


41 posted on 03/25/2009 8:27:26 AM PDT by CholeraJoe (Turning gold into lead!)
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To: Petronski

I am the word’s pre-eminent Meta-Proctologist!


42 posted on 03/25/2009 8:28:59 AM PDT by Dr. Bogus Pachysandra ( Ya can't pick up a turd by the clean end!)
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To: Beagle8U
Wrong! The four basic food groups are... Salt, Sugar, Grease, and Alcohol.

Close! The 4 food groups are coffee, cigarettes, donuts & beer.

43 posted on 03/25/2009 8:29:30 AM PDT by Travis T. OJustice (Want to make a conservative angry? Lie to him. Want to make a liberal angry? Tell him the truth)
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To: Scythian
"If you eat it by yourself and finish it in one sitting, you get a free 5/3 tshirt. "

Sounds like a Challenge for Adam Richman from Travel Channel's Man vs. Food.

44 posted on 03/25/2009 8:31:00 AM PDT by mass55th (Courage is being scared to death - but saddling up anyway...John Wayne)
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To: Scythian
Good thing they're using pounds instead of kilograms.

Western Michigan's team is called the Broncos. Maybe it would have fewer calories if made from horsemeat.

45 posted on 03/25/2009 8:32:48 AM PDT by Verginius Rufus
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To: ETL

NOT GUILTY!


46 posted on 03/25/2009 8:33:20 AM PDT by PSYCHO-FREEP (WHAT? Where did my tag line go? (ACORN))
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To: Scythian

You’ll get cancer! :)


47 posted on 03/25/2009 8:34:40 AM PDT by TornadoAlley3 (Obama is everything Oklahoma is not.)
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To: ETL

Who the hell’s bright idea was the lettuce and tomatoes?...

: )


48 posted on 03/25/2009 8:36:11 AM PDT by Mac from Cleveland (How to make a small fortune in the Obama era--first, start off with a big fortune....)
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49 posted on 03/25/2009 8:39:02 AM PDT by evets (beer)
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To: PSYCHO-FREEP

Looks like it’s the same place as this one that “Wyatt’s Torch” posted earlier in the thread (see link). Note the red crosses on the hats.

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/chat/2214310/posts?page=46#36


50 posted on 03/25/2009 8:42:15 AM PDT by ETL (ALL the Obama-commie connections at my FR Home page: http://www.freerepublic.com/~etl/)
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