The Biden and the Dissembler

Clarkblog.org ^ | August 7, 2009

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The Biden and the Dissembler Were walking close at hand; They wept like anything to see Such a vast and dark Mobland: “If this were only cleared away,” They said, “it would be grand!”

“If 10 thousand cops with 10 Thousand mops Swept it for half a year. Do you suppose,” the Biden said, “That they could get it clear?” “I doubt it,” said the Dissembler, And shed a bitter tear.

“O Liberals, come and walk with us!” The Biden did beseech. “A pleasant walk, a pleasant talk, Along with a beery speech: We cannot do with more than four, To give a hand to each.”

The Lieberman Liberal looked at him, But never a word he said: The Kennedy Liberal winked his eye, And shook his heavy head— Meaning to say he did not choose To leave his Liberal-bed.

But four young Liberals hurried up, All eager for the treat: Their coats were brushed, their faces washed, They all looked very sweet— This wasn’t odd, because, you know, The Biden sez he's “Neat”.

Four other Liberals followed them, And yet another four; And thick and fast they came at last, And more, and more, and more— All hopping past the angry Mobs, And scrambling for the door.

The Biden and the Dissembler Walked on a mile or so, And then they rested at a table Conveniently low: Where little mugs of beer all stood And waited in a row.

“The time has come,” the Dissembler said, “To talk of many things: Of taxes—and healthcare—and Brown Shirt tactics— Of Constitutions—and kings— And why my polls are sinking low— And whose the fat broad that sings?”

“But wait a bit,” the Liberals cried, “Before we have our chat; For some of us are out of breath, And all of us are fat!” “Please hurry!” said the Dissembler. They thanked him little for that.

“A good sharp knife,” the Biden said, “Is what we chiefly need: A tourniquet and bandages Are very good indeed— Now if you’re ready, Liberals dear, We can begin our little deed.”

“But not on us!” the Liberals cried, Turning a little blue. “We have our very own special deal, for our needs and so do you! “The night is fine,” the Biden said. “Do you people like pie too??

“It was so kind of you to come! Stand up so we can all see you!!” The Dissembler said nothing but “Pour us another brew" "I wish you were not quite so damned dumb— And those hair plugs are ugly too!!”

“It seems a shame,” the Biden said, “To play them such a trick, After we’ve brought them out so far, And made them trot so quick!” The Dissembler said nothing but “Our lies are spread too thick!”

“I weep for you,” the Biden said: “I deeply sympathize.” With sobs and tears he gaped again At Hillary’s swelling thighs, Holding his pocket-handkerchief Before his streaming eyes.

“O Liberals,” said the Dissembler, “You’ve had a pleasant run! Shall we be trotting home again?’ But answer came there none— And this was scarcely odd, because They’d scared off every one.

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With deep apologies to Louis Carrol...

[CitizenM]

Very clever!