Humor (General/Chat)
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The Marines send a not so subtle message to the government.
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So, you think you're a pretty good person: you call your mom on Mother's Day, you always try to give your employer two week's notice and you make a conscience effort to control your spending habits before filing bankruptcy. You think of yourself as a person who loves children and who is always kind to the elderly. Think again. Take the Death Row Serial Killer Quiz*
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Say hi to Lucy. Lucy is part of Generation Y, the generation born between the late 1970s and the mid 1990s. She's also part of a yuppie culture that makes up a large portion of Gen Y. I have a term for yuppies in the Gen Y age group—I call them Gen Y Protagonists & Special Yuppies, or GYPSYs. A GYPSY is a unique brand of yuppie, one who thinks they are the main character of a very special story. So Lucy's enjoying her GYPSY life, and she's very pleased to be Lucy. Only issue is this one thing: Lucy's...
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Squirrels are working White house garden while Michelle’s gardeners will get paid for doing nothing. House gardeners are allowed only to water the plots and cannot harvest the vegetables. Park Service gardeners who normally tend the mushrooms, peppers, squash and other tasty items have only been permitted to water the plants. Under the peculiar rules in effect, they are not allowed to rake or weed or even mow the grass. Pounds and pounds of ripe organic bounty have gone to waste. Weeds are springing up
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Community Contest: Rebrand the Washington Redskins Winner Selected:
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mosin-nagant The Mosin-nagant is an old school bolt action rifle from Russia. Originally designed by a drunk Russian engineer and an even more drunk Belgian gunsmith, who drew up blueprints on napkins in the back of a pub somewhere in Siberia in a vodka-induced stupor. The Mosin-nagant fires the 7.62x54r cartridge, which can kill a polar bear at a thousand yards and keep going right through the tree he was standing in front of. The Mosin-nagant was used by the Russians in both world wars, so it's killed more Germans than collisions on the autobahn and under-cooked sauerkraut combined. Surplus...
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The Won March Most of us have heard the tune "Colonel Bogey March," though we are probably most familiar with it as the tune whistled by the POW's in the movie "The Bridge on the River Kwai," and called "The River Kwai March." A variant of the song was famously used mockingly towards Adolph Hitler, titled "Hitler Has Only Got One Ball." I think the Barry-Cades marchers should start mocking "The Won" using this tune. It'll stick in his evil gizzard like a hot nail. I propose a lyrics contest for the tune "The Won March." Here are my two...
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U.S. President Barack Obama speaks as he lends a hand during a visit to Martha's Table, a kitchen that provides meals for the needy, in Washington October 14, 2013. With Obama are furloughed workers Dolly Garcia (L) who works at the U.S. Census Bureau and Chantelle Britton who works at Health and Human Services. Obama said on Monday it appears there has been progress in Senate fiscal impasse negotiations but that there is a good chance the United States will default on its debts if Republicans are unwilling to set aside some partisan concerns. Where's HIS hair net? Why is...
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An argument between a 43-year-old Pawleys Island man and his 41-year-old wife turned violent Sept. 28. The man told deputies he and his wife were at a wedding reception in DeBordieu when he saw his wife “grinding up on another guy while dancing.” The man said he got upset and told his wife they were leaving. In her statement, the woman admitted she was dancing “seductively” with another man. She said her husband grabbed her by the arm and “escorted her” out of the building. The man said he did not hit his wife but she claims he hit her...
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Can anyone create an iconic graphic?
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From around the interwebs, some funny cartoons!
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“The Magician Prankster” camouflages himself in his car and makes it look like a TERRIFYING SKELETON is pulling up in the drive-through in this funny prank video.
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Video of why we can't compete with the Chinese: http://static.video.qq.com/TPout.swf?auto=1&vid=r010673xh67
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Monday, October 25, 20105 Best Countries to Escape America's Decline Activist Post Okay, you're upset with the direction America is headed and you've been thinking of moving to another country. Perhaps you feel exhaustively cynical about the political, economic, or social situation in the U.S. and think it is beyond repair. You wouldn't be alone. Many top economists and other trend forecasters are now openly predicting that a total economic, environmental, and social collapse may be imminent in America.
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World Egg Day When : Second Friday in October What's all the egg-citement about? Why, today is World Egg Day! World Egg Day celebrates and promotes the benefits of eggs. It is truly a world, or international, celebration, from China and New Zealand, to Great Britain and Mexico. This is no yolk. Eggs certainly are what they are cracked up to be. Aside from high cholesterol, eggs are a healthy food. High in nutrition, and low in fat, people all over the world enjoy eggs. And, they celebrate eggs on this day. 1,000 Year old Eggs! Now here's a yummy...
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The College Football Czar: Week 7 Week six in review: The NCAA has proceeded with its disastrous decision to appoint a college football playoff selection committee, and already, you can foresee the fabric of the game coming unraveled. Among the committee members who have been appointed to select the four semifinalists for the 2014 season is former secretary of state Condoleezza Rice. Immediately, there came protests that Rice is unqualified, but then, what qualifications are there, really? If the idea is to make sure that the best team gets a shot at the national championship, then just about any fan...
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I just watched that vid of Chris Hayes talking about the Constitution being the problem with our government and it struck me that he looks just like that other guy on MSNBC who pretends to be a girl. I did a little research and I haven't found even one instance of "Chris Hayes" and "Rachael Maddow" being in the same place at the same time. I'm also pretty sure there is only one pair of those birth control glasses left in existence, yet they "each" seem to have them. They "both" seem to have about the same limited grip on...
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THU, OCT 10 NY Giants at Chicago 8:25 PM SUN, OCT 13 Cincinnati at Buffalo 1:00 PM Detroit at Cleveland 1:00 PM Oakland at Kansas City 1:00 PM Carolina at Minnesota 1:00 PM Pittsburgh at NY Jets 1:00 PM Philly at Tampa Bay 1:00 PM Green Bay at Baltimore 1:00 PM St. Louis at Houston 1:00 PM Jacksonville at Denver 4:05 PM Tennessee at Seattle 4:05 PM Arizona at San Fran 4:25 PM Saints at New England 4:25 PM Washington at Dallas 8:30 PM MON, OCT 14 Colts at San Diego 8:30 PM Bye: Atlanta, Miami
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The latest in New York City dining? Eating in silence. A restaurant in Brooklyn's trendy Greenpoint neighborhood is serving up a four-course meal of organic, locally-sourced food, but isn't allowing any chit-chat. 'Eat' restaurant chef Nicholas Nauman says he was inspired to put on the occasional 'No Talking' affairs after spending time with Buddhist monks in India. He says the silence allows customers a chance to better experience the food. The restaurant's Facebook page says seats fill up fast at the no talking meals. It costs $40 for 4 courses. Epicurious.com Editor-in-Chief Tanya Steel says the silent eating experience sounds...
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Our hidden camera experiment captures the reactions of unsuspecting customers at a New York City coffee shop as they witness a telekinetic event.
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Why isn't the mainstream media?
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It's scary enough watching Carrie wreak havoc with her telekinetic powers on a movie screen. Imagine what it would be like to see it while you were ordering a latte. For some unsuspecting patrons of a New York City coffee shop, a scary confrontation straight out of a Stephen King novel (and its two movie adaptations) happened right before their eyes.
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We on the right side of history often feel the need to take a shower after wading through the swamp of politically correct double-speak. Euphemisms often provide a bright, shiny, antiseptic-look and feel to many issues, hiding it's putrid underside. Phrases like "pro-choice", affirmative action", "affordable care" and now "clean bill"; what reasonable person could be against these wonderful ideas? Obviously only right-wings cretins, bent on their "war on women" and against "sustainable living". But given it is de rigueur du jour, I would really like to focus on "clean bill". Here is the picture in my head: Setting: the...
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Workers at the office assemble a panel of co-workers to represent them on a committee to make decisions concerning the general welfare of the employees. This committee is elected on condition that they faithfully the interests of their peers. The committee wants to work toward overhauling the current soda machine selection at the office. The current machine is expensive and makes soft drinks unaffordable for lower income workers. The poll shows that most workers think the soda system is in need of reform. Encouraged by the response, the committee makes plans to replace the machine. They conduct another poll asking...
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During the Government Shutdown, the National Park Service Police are the first defense against society collapsing under the onslaught of tourists and World War II veterans overwhelming the Barry-cades at our most precious national monuments. These are their stories.
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Published on Aug 7, 2013 Mattress Firm Commercial
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dy_LMyvHTJ8 Part One and http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dy_LMyvHTJ8 Part Two
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Fox asked Pacific Rim Director to create the couch gig for the opening of their annual Treehouse of Horror 24 and it does not disappoint.
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"There's a difference between a ghetto car repair and a geniusly ghetto car repair. With a ghetto car repair, there's no passion, no creativity. It's like using duct tape to reattach a bumper or putting saran wrap over a broken window. A geniusly ghetto car repair is different. It's an artistic approach to avoiding paying for a car repair or upgrade. It's finding a solution to an automotive problem using stuff from around the house. The results aren't elegant but they're clever. It's MacGyver meets Rube Goldberg meets People of Walmart. I picked 11 of my favorite photos that fall...
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Retired Military Working Dog discovers first kitten
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President Obama has been playing golf at a furious pace this year – already heading out more times than during any year of his presidency – but the government shutdown raises the prospect that his favorite leisure activity is about to be suspended. It’s unclear how a presidential golf outing could be justified as “essential,” which is the general standard for government activities that continue during the shutdown. When Obama is in Washington, he plays at one of two publicly funded courses – either the links at Andrews Air Force Base or at Fort Belvoir. His rounds are paid for...
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Due to the government shut down....the Silliness Thread has been #barrycaded. ***THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS*** Naw....no amount of barrycading is gonna stop me....Now, as reported at American Glob, Barrycade Earns Entry At Urban Dictionary. The definition seems to fit:1. barrycade 1. A barrier (usually temporary) that exists for no reason.2. A barrier erected for political reasons.“Dude, Obama barrycaded the park.”“Hey, let’s put up some barrycades to keep those World War II veterans away from the open-air World War II Memorial in Washington, D.C., in order to try and score some cheap political points.”What I've been wondering about the barrycades... When the government does something...
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The following is a correction to the Czar's pick on the Arizona State-Notre Dame game, which is being played in Arlington, and not in San Antonio, as is indicated in his original pick. Arizona State vs. Notre Dame The 3-1 Sun Devils stuck a fork in USC coach Lane Kiffin in a 62-41 runaway. Quarterback Taylor Kelly led the team in rushing with 79 yards on four carries, while also passing for 351 yards and three TDs. At 3-2, the Fighting Irish have lost to their first two ranked opponents: Michigan (41-30) and Oklahoma (34-20). Last week against OU, quarterback...
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The College Football Czar: Week 6 Week five in review: Although the 2013 season has really just now gotten underway in earnest, there have already been two head coaches fired, and rightly so. USC finally tired of Lane Kiffin’s poor results and abrasive personality during his fourth season with the Trojans. The only reason Kiffin’s record at Southern Cal was as good as 28-15 was that he was fortunate enough to inherit QB Matt Barkley from his predecessor, Pete Carroll. It’s not just that Kiffin has only gone 10-8 since the start of the 2012 season, but the fact that...
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Exclusive to The Briefing Room...hope you enjoy
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Week 5 - THU, OCT 3 Buffalo at Cleveland SUN, OCT 6 New Orleans at Chicago New England at Cincinnati Detroit at Green Bay Kansas City at Tennessee Seattle at Indianapolis Jacksonville at St. Louis Baltimore at Miami Philadelphia at NY Giants Carolina at Arizona Denver at Dallas Houston at San Francisco San Diego at Oakland MON, OCT 7 NY Jets at Atlanta Bye: Minnesota, Pittsburgh, Tampa Bay, Washington
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Just where is he going to put all those chicken nuggets? Drive-thru staff were left running scared when a skeleton ‘driving’ a car pulled up to their window to pick up some takeaway food. While some workers ran away in horror after encountering the hungry bones, one man took snaps to upload to his Instagram account as another burst into laughter. ‘Oh my god, I wanna start crying,’ said one prank victim. While another joked: ‘You want some sauce?’ The takeaway trick is the work of internet prankster known as the Magic of Rahat who was hidden in the back...
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A driver was stuck in a traffic jam on the highway outside Washington, DC. Nothing was moving. Suddenly, a man knocks on the window. The driver rolls down the window and asks, "What's going on?" - "Terrorists have kidnapped the entire White House, and they're asking for a $100 million dollar ransom. Otherwise, they are going to douse them all in gasoline and set them on fire. We are going from car to car, collecting donations." - "How much is everyone giving, on an average?" the driver asks. The man replies, "Roughly a gallon."
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Ig Nobel Prize in physics goes to research about walking on water on the moon.Every year in December, the Swedish Academy of Sciences hands out Nobel Prizes for the most important discoveries in science. A few months before, in less grand circumstances, the magazine Annals of Improbable Research The Ig Nobels are given to research that ‘first makes people laugh, and then makes them think’. The categories vary year to year but mostly cover science and engineering, with peace and literature occasionally thrown in, too. Previous awards have been handed out to projects like minimizing the risk of colonoscopy...
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