Zombies would most likely wipe out humanity if they really existed, claim scientists

The Telegraph ^ | 8-18-09 | Richard Alleyne

[dynachrome]

Civilisation would most likely be finished in the event of a zombie outbreak, claim Canadian mathematicians who have calculated the possible devastation caused by an attack by the fictional monsters. Using models developed to calculate the effects of more plausible pandemics, the team from the University of Ottawa have discovered that unless man struck back quickly and aggressively then they would be doomed.

The scientific paper, which is published in a book “Infectious Diseases Modelling Research Progress”, looks at an attack by the undead creatures, who infect the living with a bite.

In their study, titled When Zombies Attack!, the researchers picked “classic” slow-moving zombies such as those in Dawn of the Dead as models and divided humanity into three: the living, zombies and the “removed” – zombies who had been killed by decapitation.

[dynachrome]

This is HUGH!

[dynachrome]

I could not resist.

Chat is the proper place?

[al baby]

You mean Democrats Bob Hope tells us that

[Drango]

bite me.

[dynachrome]

Classic clip and movie from Mr. Hope!

[cranked]

More wasted junk science courtesy of UK’s version of the National Enquirer.

[al baby]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RWpU8sX10_4

[Lee'sGhost]

BWAHahahahahahahahahaha... There is SO much wrong with this. Funny as hell.

[ColdSteelTalon]

And if I farted big enough it would wipe out humanity !!!!

[arbooz]

[darkangel82]

ping
lol

[Nervous Tick]

Apparently British scientists and British dentists are educated in the same institutions. Probably their cooks as well.

[bcsco]

This is series!

looks at an attack by the undead creatures, who infect the living with a bite.

I love it when my wife does that to me...

[dynachrome]

What are Canadian mathemeticians smoking, anyway?

LOL

[bamahead]

But ONLY stratospheric zombies!

[Jim Noble]

Zombies couldn’t break 53% last year, with many things in their favor.

And our zombie defense has barely started.

I’m not worried.

[steveo]

Bwaiiiking neuwess!

[GeronL]

Meanwhile the Democrats said they can pass the Public Option without GOP

[glock rocks]

[Mr_Moonlight]

Using models developed to calculate the effects of more plausible pandemics, the team from the University of Ottawa have discovered that unless man struck back quickly and aggressively then they would be doomed.

Man, wouldn't it be so nice to attend college on a government grant and all ya'd have to do is play video games all day .....

[Pearls Before Swine]

More things to worry about.

[Anitius Severinus Boethius]

And this is why zombie war preparation is vital!

[MarineBrat]

There are zombies among us now!

[GreatOne]

Only if they were fast-moving zombies. The slow, Romero zombies would be put down. Remember how efficient the gun-choppers were in Black Hawk Down? Same thing.

Yes, might be a little more complicated because of the need for head shots, but our military would be more than capable of accomplishing the task.

[colorado tanker]

The biggest problem with zombies is their strange ability to get their must faster human victims to fall down when running away or to hold up in deserted remote farm houses.

[Lurker]

L

[dynachrome]

“B-r-r-r-r-r-a-a-a-a-a-i-i-i-i-i-i-n-s!”

[KoRn]

Zombie ping!

[Yossarian]

Zombies would most likely wipe out humanity...


I'm inclined to agree

[chuck_the_tv_out]

That's what I'm afraid of.

[bamahead]

Zombie bump

[Alex Murphy]

How did I miss this important news?

[Vanders9]

It must be a VERY slow news day. Actually, given the Telegraph’s recent output it must be a very slow news month.