Posted on 04/22/2010 7:24:39 PM PDT by JoeProBono
WASHINGTON, - An American Chemical Society report says a growing shortage of high-quality paper for recycling is threatening the supply of soft toilet paper.
The article by Melody Voith, senior editor of the ACS journal Chemical & Engineering News, explains the decline of newspapers and magazines and the growth of electronic communications have combined to reduce the availability of good white office paper, newsprint and other traditional recyclable paper that has been used to make soft bathroom tissue.
Voith explains recycled office paper itself is containing increasing amounts of recycled paper and that, in turn, decreases its usefulness for making high-quality personal paper that is soft enough to satisfy many consumers.
She says chemists are responding to the paper crunch by searching for new coatings, resins and other additives to improve the softness, strength and performance of today's recycled paper.
I’m afraid this story proves that things will not end well.
Eco-Nuts wanted to ban soft TP anyways
Isn’t this how it started with Soviet Russia?
We better have congress take control over soft toilet paper industry before its too late.
Really?
After decades of John Wayne paper at work we just got something user friendly last week.
The story sounds a bit absurd but my view with Hussein is the USA could fall apart like the old USSR. We may see little things like this happening first. Then food shortages, riots by govt union workers wanting more benefits and pay - see Illinois yesterday.
If it’s too soft, it won’t fix the itch!
okay folks, back to cornshucks.
I remember they day I bought a brand of TP other than Charmin and all I got were loud protests from my 3 sons and husband.....I have only bought Charmin since
Save the trees!
One square at a time.
It’ll be da law.
Right about the time they install that little gadget in your home to make sure your thermostat isnt using too much energy.
We could always go back to using corncobs, or be like the french and use a bidet.
http://thelongestlistofthelongeststuffatthelongestdomainnameatlonglast.com/trivia74.html
Well, whether you believe it or not, there was a toilet paper shortage in the United States in 1973. The entire episode started with a Johnny Carson Tonight Show monologue. On December 19, 1973, the writers for the show had heard earlier the federal government was falling behind in getting bids to supply toilet paper and that it might be possible that in a few months the United States could face a shortage of toilet tissue. They took the words of this Wisconsin congressional representative, Harold Froehlich and decided to add a joke for Carson for the evening show.
Carson did in fact use the joke in a monologue stating, “You know what’s disappearing from the supermarket shelves? Toilet paper. There’s an acute shortage of toilet paper in the United States.”
Much to the amazement of not only the show but of toilet paper factories across America, 20 million people that watched the Carson show that evening ran out in the morning and bought as much toilet paper as they could carry. By noon on December 20, 1973, practically every store in America was out of stock. Many of the stores tried to ration this valuable paper but they could not keep up with the demand no matter what they did.
http://thelongestlistofthelongeststuffatthelongestdomainnameatlonglast.com/trivia74.html
I bought it all up and created a shortage.
Tree's beware.
Eco-Nuts wanted to ban soft TP anyways
We keep 4 years worth in stock (in addition to about 4 years of everything else)...just waiting for the dollar crash (which must come)...and now the VAT.
Maybe I need to double my quantity of toilet paper now.
I went to France once.
On checking out the hotel rooms, a shipmate declared, “Hey they have a water fountain in here!!” slurp...
LoL
The economy is down but paper must be doing great.
I live in the Florida panhandle and see a huge number of pulpwood trucks pass by every day. I never noticed it until I began sitting on my porch more often. I would guess several hundred a day pass by loaded and unloaded.
Lamh Foistenach Abu!
If they muck with my Charmin they’ll be slitting their own throats!
I’m afraid that you may be on to something: it is entirely conceivable that a state (think California) will enact some sort of onerous regulation that will result in travellers to bring their own toilet paper—much like travellers did so when visiting the former Soviet Union. Add the federal government, and we have a real stew.
AY YI YIIIIIIII
Well, we are in deep doo doo....
“the end is near” ping...
I’ve been wondering why I cant buy the mega rolls of charmin aloe TP. I knew it had to do with some greenie idea. I’ve been to numerous grocery stores and they just dont carry it anymore. No reasons given.
In his novel Candide, Voltaire wrote that chickens made the best toilet paper.
My father grew up using the Sears catalogue in the old two holer.
If I was stuck on a desert island, the one thing I would want with me is a life time supply of TP.
Isn’t there labor laws to protect them?
I bet they now toss the recyclables in the same pile as the trash.
What a joke.
Back in 1986 I went on a trip to Germany. While riding a train, I visited the restroom. I was quite surprised to see wood chips and large chunks of other stuff in the TP. It was so strange, I actually tore off a sheet and kept it to prove to the folks back home just how bad it was.
Soft toilet paper will soon be banned anyway. The Obama administration will decree that, if developing countries don’t have soft toilet paper, we shouldn’t have any either.
I guess my lifetime supply of incandescent light bulbs wouldn’t help much...
Charmin is not what it used to be, it has lost some of it softness in spite of those irritating bear commercials.....
Paging Johnny Carson for the great artificial toilet paper shortage part two.
Now I appreciate a good imported bean cup of coffee, a good micro/import brew, etc. but a few things that I’ll never be above:
* truck stop type coffee, black
* plain ole bar soap
* scratchy ass toilet paper
* mass brewed crap beer in a can
Oh, I don't know. With enough TP, you can connect the light bulbs together to build a raft and attempt to get back to civilization.
Good point...TP, the universal life saver.
Mega Rolls !
Whatta buncha baby ass babies! I use the New York Times and other MSN giants to wipe mine. Wanna examine it for evidence?
If it means the NY Times and the rest of the traitor rags all go broke, then it’s worth it.
LOL
Collateral damage.....
This was in France you know, during the enlightenment, just prior to the revolution. With the king in power, it was either be TP, or have your liver removed for patee.
I'd settle for Ginger and Mary Ann. But without the TP, I suppose after while, even they would lose their appeal..
No Sh!T!
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