BOL! I can still laugh at this but my wife still gets mad.
A few years ago, before our deer fence was put in, one of my wife' friends felt sorry for my wife losing over 30 roses to our local deer.
This woman took my wife to local nursey and bought a beautiful rose and a big container for it. Then, she had the nursery deliver it and put on the deck outside our dining room.
My wife was estatic, and I told her be sure to keep the sliding glass door closed by the new rose on our patio. Because after feeding on her new rose, they might want to come the house to feed, rest and have a nature call.
As usual my wife told me that I was over reacting. That no deer would come up on our back deck. I shrugged and went into the family room to watch tv and read the local fishwrap.
In a few minutes I saw an Alpha buck with 7 antler points on each side, sneak by in our back yard heading for the new rose. I told my wife, that she needed to check on her new rose.
She ran from the kitchen to the dining room and saw the big Bambi chowing own on her new trophy rose. She started banging on the glass door and shouting at the deer. It continued to eat.
She asked if I was going to do anything, and I replied that would be over reacting on my part.
I'm omitting what was said to me as she ran past me and headed into our bedroom. In less than a minute she came back with my Ruger 357 and an instant load cylinder.
She said, "Load the damn thing for me and I will shoot it."
I explained to her that we had neigbors well with in range. I took the 357 and bullets away from her, and told her to go close the glass door. Then, I went to our bedroom and got the pellet gun that fired bb's and put a bb into the chamber and pumped it 7 times. Then, I opened the sliding glass door in our bedroom and had a clear line of so to the buck.
Then, I scoped in and tried an urological shot/procedure to neuter the buck. I fired and got a direct hit. It jumped and hit the closed door and bounced off and staggered into the back yard. While it was doing this, I reloaded and put another bb through one of its ears and off a horn. It shook its head and bounded out of the yard like an olympic high jumper.
A minute later, I asked my still simmering wife, "Well are you going to thank me?"
After a long hard glare from her, I said other deer would be back for what's left. Sure enough we had a couple of more uninvited 4 legged tick/flea carriers visit our deck for a rose bud salad that evening until I put a large heavy duty garbage over what was left of the rose tied it off at the bottom . The next day, she had our yard guy pack what was left of her new rose and give it to a friend with a fence to plant it and bring the container back. That rose is now beautiful and large in our friends fenced in yard.
Now, with our deer fence, my wife has a beautiful rose in the same container safe on the same deck.
She still doesn't think that this story is funny when I tell it to new acquaintances.
