Posted on 01/12/2013 11:22:50 AM PST by LouAvul
Hypothetical.
Scenario: If a senior citizen becomes physically incapacitated, but reasonably mentally alert, and it is impractical for her to move in with family. Her sole support is social security at approximately $2000 month.
Are there any options in terms of assisted living? Other retirement facilities?
Also, what if she's not physically incapacitated, but simply is unable to live alone?
I'm sure many of you have addressed or, at least, investigated such events.
thank you
I changed my entire life so that I could look after my elderly parents (moved and change jobs so I could work out of the house). My dad passed away last July and I would say, in retrospect, looking after him in his last years (12 years to be precise) was one of the best things I have ever done (for me and for him and my mother). I still look after my mother.
As an aside, in the months before my dad died, he asked me one day "why are you so good to me...why are you taking care of me?" I asked him, "would you have done it for me if the tables were turned?" He said "of course."
"Well, Pop, that's why I am doing it for you...I simply want to."
Since he passed away, I have not had one moment of regret or remorse. He is a devout Christian and I know he is having a wonderful time in an unimaginably wonderful place.
Unfortunately we’ve had this scenario a few times.
My MIL moved in with us when my FIL passed away (we put an addition on our home, and it worked fine.) However, there came a point when she didn’t want to be left alone, even though her health was good, it was more of a psychological need. At that point it was not practical or possible for us to be home all the time. We found a wonderful retirement complex that did not require a buy in but payment was more like “rent”, month to month. It wasn’t far from our home (about 15 minutes) and there were people available to help 24/7 including medical personnel (that made her feel “safe.”)
It wasn’t cheap, but absolutely everything was included in the cost (meals, suite of rooms, waterfront view, utilities, phone, maid service, transportation and so many amenities were located in the building it was the perfect solution.
There were three levels of care at the facility. Independent, an assisted living area for those needing more help, and a nursing home. Also an on call dr. in the building and a nursing staff. A bank, post office, gym, library, mini theater, daily boat rides or fishing trips (it was on the water) and a gorgeous view.
Here’s a link to the facility we used but at the top there’s a link to other facilities owned by this corporation in other parts of the country.
http://www.watermarkcommunities.com/BocaCiegaBay/
We recently investigated it for another family member, who’s living alone, and doesn’t want to move in with his kids, and when we counted his home insurance, taxes, upkeep, cable, food, cleaning,car expenses, etc. the cost was not that far off. The cost was around $1800/month, if I remember correctly. Here again, there’s money that would have to be spent down, and why not live someplace pleasant with lots of interaction and activities.
My mom was very sick for the last 18 months of her life, our only option was a specialty nursing facility or round the clock at home nursing care. Since she had retirement money to pay down, she wouldn’t have qualified for Medicaid. The retirement funds were in her name and would have been subject to pay down. What I found out at that time, if you’re having to pay down funds, nursing homes are %6-8K per month, at home 24/7 nursing care was cheaper by a couple thousand a month...$1100 per week.
Hope you find a suitable solution for your situation. Many of us are having to face these choices having to do with elder care. They call us the “sandwich” generation...kids on one side, elderly parents on the other, and us in between. Sometimes we felt more like a panini, than an ordinary sandwich. :)
My mother has come close because of her lousy attitude. She likes the staff but can’t stand the residents. She’s originally from NY and thinks the people here is MA. are a bunch of no nothings. She’s extremely conservative and hates that so few of the people around her are either liberal or have no clue.
That’s funny - my MIL was from NY, too. Very mouthy, except she was an uber Democrat.
She was actually kicked out of 3 different places that I recall. And the facilities always keep your deposit even if the person has only been there a couple of weeks!
For the purposes of Medicaid, the house doesn’t count as an asset as long as you (or your spouse) live in it. One car doesn’t count, and an IRA also doesn’t count except for distributions.
“Since she had retirement money to pay down, she wouldn’t have qualified for Medicaid.”
Retirement money, if it’s in the form of an IRA doesn’t count as an asset for Medicaid. Only the distribution counts, and and if that doesn’t surpass the 2K asset rule you would be OK. You must however be taking a minimum distribution. SS payments do count as do other assets. Your house and car don’t count if your living in it.
My spouse is on Medicaid and has an IRA.
Find room to take care of your eldery people. Pool your resources and open your hearts. Keep them out of deathcare. They belong to you. You will not be sorry.
Find room to take care of your elderly people. Pool your resources and open your hearts. Keep them out of deathcare. They belong to you. You will not be sorry.
Very true, but once the owner and spouse have passed on, Medicaid can direct the house be sold and proceeds cover the costs while one/both were alive receiving benefits. Transferring a house to a family trust prevents that while allowing the owner and/or spouse to live in it for their lifetime.
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