Posted on 08/13/2013 1:06:05 PM PDT by nickcarraway
By now you've probably heard: Short haircuts are happening. Everywhere. From the September Vogue Paris cover, to Coco Rocha's Instagram in real time, to Rihanna, who went short a few weeks ago. And if there are other life forms out there in the universe, I’m sure even they have heard about Beyoncé’s pixie cut, polled their colonies for their citizens’ opinions, and put forth multiple theories about why she did it.
But as a short-haired woman for the past two years, I’ve been watching the pixie hysteria unfold with some level of bemusement. I was never that comfortable with long hair on myself. The longest I’ve had it is to my shoulders, and the bob is sort of my sweet spot. But in the early nineties, I was really into Depeche Mode and wanted to date someone with Martin Gore hair. I was not attracted to Gore himself — too asexual. But I loved his hair and I finally decided that if I couldn’t date his hair, then I would have his hair. This led to years of various bowl cuts, mousse experiments, and sometimes tears. But it’s still the ideal to which I aspire. In the meantime, if you're considering chopping all of your hair off, I'd like to share a few things I've learned:
It’s Not Sexy and Men Hate It After Bey cut her hair, I got a press release from the appalling dating site WhatsYourPrice.com, wherein people bid to go on dates with you and you get to keep the money. Men there bid about 40 percent less on women with hair above their shoulders than on women with hair below their shoulders. Now, I actually take that as a compliment, because I’d definitely rather have a man who knows the value of a dollar and doesn’t squander it all on long-haired bimbos. (I kid! It’s not your fault, my long-tressed sisters, that your hair makes men want to have babies with you.)
My husband met me when I had short hair and claims to like it. I’ll just have to take him at his word. I’m pretty sure Linda Evangelista, another nineties hair idol of mine who frequently chopped her hair, never had any problem getting a man into her bed. Miley Cyrus was recently No. 1 on the Maxim hot list, an honor rarely bestowed on ladies without classic bombshell hair, which Miley pointed out.
Dumb People Will Probably Assume You Are a Lesbian Because, Ellen. Someone recently told me that I look like Ellen, actually. (If only I could get my tousle as perfect as hers.) My college-age nephews used to call me Uncle Cheryl as a joke when I first cut my hair. Ah, Midwestern 19-year-old humor!
Or That You Are Going Through a Life Phase of Some Sort By the fall, I’m quite certain colleges will be offering psychology courses about Beyoncé’s cut, which you can only take after you pass Michelle Obama’s Bangs 101 and Lady Gaga's Beauty Bi-polarism 201. Stylist and author Lauren Rothman told the the Washington Post, “It’s the end of the Mrs. Carter Tour and she’s really getting into motherhood and the throes of her 30s, or it could be the expression of a significant life change we may not know about.” I actually sort of buy this explanation. Women make changes to their appearance when change occurs in their lives or when they think they need something different. (Or, you know, when they get their weave stuck in a fan.) Hence the dreaded “breakup bangs” phenomenon. And remember how Emma Watson cut her hair after Harry Potter was over to make a statement of emancipation? Michelle Williams, my own personal short hair hero, is growing hers out, and it might be because she’s finally ready to move on from Heath Ledger, who supposedly loved her with short hair.
Finally, People Think You’re Really Brave to Go That Short Buzzfeed published a list of things you should never say to a woman with short hair, and they all involve some sort of backhanded compliment. I’ve heard every single one of them, and I noticed this happening with people’s reactions to Beyoncé’s cut, too. They wrote things like “Beyoncé could walk around with bird droppings on her head and she’d look hot!” The implicit message being that the cut is the equivalent of guano?
I like having short hair. The fact that celebs are embracing the cut is a bit of a double-edged sword, though. For a while I heard, "Oh, you have the Miley!" (Is that a compliment? Unclear.) But maybe it will make it less scary for other, non-celebrity women to try. The cut is a real confidence builder, because you don't have any hair to hide behind. It's just your cheekbones against the world.
Do I sometimes wish I could just wake up one morning with long hair and avoid the painful growing-out process? Yes. Mostly because I want to try one of those Game of Thrones Khaleesi braid tutorials.
I guess I’m old fashioned
I will never get a pixie cut. Most men like longer hair.
What a difference a dress and makeup makes!
That’s too long for a pixie.
That is more of a Swiffer haircut.
I’ve tried so many shampoos, but have never found one that works with my hair. Mr. T seems to be able to use anything, and his hair always looks perfect. If I don’t completely blow-dry my hair, I look like a budding Rastafarian. It’s kind of funny.
Emmy Lou recently had her hair cut. She was on the cover of some guitar magazine, and although I always liked her hair long, she looks very nice.
Good for you!
My hair is long (below the shoulder), dark, and curly. Hubby loves it. Curly hair can drive a woman nuts until she finds out how to care for it it. I wash with shampoo every four days or so, and wash with conditioner the rest of the time....then it’s more conditioner, and leave-in conditioner. I go through the stuff like you wouldn’t believe. But making sure it gets enough moisture is the secret. That, and staying away from stylists....I never met one who knew what to do with my hair. So I trim the ends myself.
I look horrible with long hair ... just like my mother always said. When I got my hair cut in the early 90s, after a baby threw up into it a few times, one of my coworkers thought there was a temp at my desk, because he’d never noticed my face before. Another sidled up at the copier and said, “I didn’t know you were pretty!”
Hilarious bra ad makes a very memorable point
http://agbeat.com/business-marketing/hilarious-bra-ad-makes-a-memorable-point/
Isn’t it funny? That something as simple as the length of one’s hair could make such a difference!
Also essential for an education in classical music...even opera.
"Oh Bwunhilda....you are so wovvvvwee!"
Is the point that “gender” is all in one’s imagination?
I went into peri at 40 so you are probably there but very lucky to be asymptomatic.
Try the progesterone first as that drops before estrogen.
Usually we have estrogen dominance to start with.
I use Rennaiscance myself.
Www.ultrapms.com
Haven’t been without for 12 years.
I always tell hubby I’m running low on crazy cream....:)
My aunt is a stylist and mom took me for a trim one day.
She lopped off 6” and I went apoplectic.
Several months later, the Mick Jagger shag got forced on me.
When I left home at 18, that was it.
It’s been shoulder blade length or more ever since.
Yes, it’s a “trauma”.
This is in January, but I can tell I'd just had my hair cut, same as it is now.
But at 52 I’m at the point in my life that I’m not out to impress anyone anymore. That’s not to say I don’t want to and strive to look nice; clean neat flattering fashionable but age appropriate clothes, makeup, jewelry, hair neat and styled, but I’m more about spending time doing things more fun than blow drying my hair for 20 -30 minutes then using a curling iron or flattening iron for another 20 minutes – that’s 40 to 50 minutes of my life each day I can use to do other things.
I love my pixie short hair cut. I love not waking up in the middle of the night during “night sweats” and having hair stuck to the back of my face and neck, I love that I save money on shampoo and conditioner, I love that when it’s 95 and humid, I don’t feel like I’m wearing a soggy string mop on the top of my head and I love that it takes me about 5 – 10 minutes to style my hair in the morning.
I’m also turning grey (white actually so for now it blends nicely with my natural blonde highlights) and it doesn’t scare me anymore and I’ve even stopped coloring my hair ; ).
My hairstyle is very similar to this BTW.
More that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
yes.
You sir are a lucky man!
I remember my mother telling me her father thought long hair was unclean. So he had all his girls line up for the barber to bob their hair. My grandfather was the dictator of the family and my mother and aunts had no say. (But as a concession, most of the time I had long hair. It was my cousin, the beautician that screwed up.)
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