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Do fathers make good mothers? Experts say special ‘maternal instincts’ are a societal construct
National Post ^ | June 13, 2014 | Sarah Boesveld

Posted on 06/15/2014 6:46:20 PM PDT by rickmichaels

When Charlotte Callaghan wakes up in the night, her small voice swells through the dark as she calls out for comfort.

“Daaaaaaaadddyyyy!” the three-year-old will yell, until her father comes to coax her back to sleep. Sometimes she’ll scurry down the hall and try to crawl into bed with him.

Spencer Callaghan, a 38-year-old father to two daughters (his youngest, Harper, is 1), works from the family’s Ottawa home as a digital marketing consultant, taking care of the breakfast and dinner routine as his wife, Courtney Callaghan, a teacher, goes to and from school.

When Charlotte was born, he felt like a bit of a “third wheel.” But hundreds of diaper changes later, and the more time spent together, he became extremely attuned to her needs, and she responded in kind. When her sister came along, the desire for daddy tended to rise.

“I wouldn't call it a maternal instinct; I’d call it a parental instinct,” he said. “I don’t say that to disparage the concept of a motherly instinct, but there’s also a fatherly instinct.”

(Excerpt) Read more at news.nationalpost.com ...


TOPICS: Society
KEYWORDS:

1 posted on 06/15/2014 6:46:20 PM PDT by rickmichaels
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To: rickmichaels

I think there is a slight advantage to a breastfeeding mother, over a father, during infancy. There is chemistry there. After that, things sort of even out, although it does seem to me that people in their 20s find themselves reconnecting with Dad, getting his guidance and blessing, so to speak, as they go into careers.


2 posted on 06/15/2014 6:52:54 PM PDT by married21 ( As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.)
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To: rickmichaels

Fathers make good Fathers and Mothers make good Mothers.

If a family loses one the other will usually take on some of the characteristics of their opposite parent. At least that is how it used to be.

Of course not every family is ideal or totally typical.


3 posted on 06/15/2014 6:53:22 PM PDT by yarddog (Romans 8: verses 38 and 39. "For I am persuaded".)
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To: rickmichaels

no


4 posted on 06/15/2014 6:58:31 PM PDT by yldstrk ( My heroes have always been cowboys)
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To: rickmichaels

Ok, why is a three year old not sleeping throught the night? I find a lot of modern parents don’t allow their children when infants to self-sooth and pick them up for the slightest noise the infant makes. Once in a great while a child will have a nightmare which is understandable. And a lot of the “night terrors” can be linked to a poor diet, not enough exercise and fresh air.

And don’t get me started on co-sleeping!!!

The very same children become unable to self-entertain as well, needing mommy or daddy’s attention for everything they do. Kids can’t play on their own these days without mommy or daddy helicoptering.


5 posted on 06/15/2014 7:00:40 PM PDT by AbolishCSEU (Percentage of Income in CS is inversely proportionate to Mother's parenting of children)
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To: rickmichaels

Our priest went on a rant about this article at the end of Mass today (a deacon had preached the homily).

“Do bulls make good cows? Do roosters make good hens? These people are (some Polish word) crazy.”


6 posted on 06/15/2014 7:01:48 PM PDT by Hieronymus ( (It is terrible to contemplate how few politicians are hanged. --G.K. Chesterton))
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To: AbolishCSEU

If by co-sleeping you mean letting a nursing child stay in bed at night, I’m all for it. As it stands, I only have to get our youngest out of the playpen at the end of the bed and roughly in position and then everyone goes back to sleep. Should we all have to wake up again to get her back in?


7 posted on 06/15/2014 7:04:20 PM PDT by Hieronymus ( (It is terrible to contemplate how few politicians are hanged. --G.K. Chesterton))
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To: rickmichaels

why dont they test this theory out in the animal world. The male and female species tend to perform different funtions


8 posted on 06/15/2014 7:07:22 PM PDT by 4rcane
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To: rickmichaels
Experts say special ‘maternal instincts’ are a societal construct

Makes sense, especially among Leftist women - after all, they're very quick to kill their offspring...

9 posted on 06/15/2014 7:08:15 PM PDT by Old Sarge (TINVOWOOT: There Is No Voting Our Way Out Of This)
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To: AbolishCSEU

I used to work with a bunch of Federal Agents. Most of them were WWII vets and were of that generation. I was a bit younger but we all began talking one afternoon about growing up.

Now some grew up in towns and some in rural areas but there was one thing we had in common. We all were given a tremendous amount of independence. Mother would call us for Dinner and Supper but other than that we played on our own. I will say our older siblings did do a lot of parenting in a way.

Some of the guys who grew up in Norfolk, VA said there was a whistle from some place which blew at noon and maybe 6:00. They said that was the cue for them to go eat lunch or come in for supper.

Today parents pretty much keep their kids underfoot constantly and in a way I can’t blame them. There is a lot of meanness going on out there.


10 posted on 06/15/2014 7:08:31 PM PDT by yarddog (Romans 8: verses 38 and 39. "For I am persuaded".)
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To: rickmichaels

“Experts say special ‘maternal instincts’ are a societal construct”

http://www.johnspeedie.com/healy/crap.wav


11 posted on 06/15/2014 7:08:50 PM PDT by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both.)
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To: Hieronymus

He obviously has no effing idea what he is blathering about. I nursed in bed and my kids wouldn’t dream of sleeping with me now. But the utter exhaustion is something only certain people can understand


12 posted on 06/15/2014 7:09:47 PM PDT by yldstrk ( My heroes have always been cowboys)
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To: rickmichaels
"Experts say special ‘maternal instincts’ are a societal construct."

Really? what about biological instinct?

In a society that lauds single mothers and derides the traditional family, it is no surprise that some so-called "expert" comes out with such a pronouncement.

Maternal instinct is not a "social construct." It is rather a basic biological instinct, exhibited across the Animal Kingdom in numerous species.



America demands Justice for the Fallen of Benghazi!

O stranger, tell the Lacedaemonians that we lie here, obedient to their command.

Listen, O isles, unto me; and hearken, ye people, from far; The LORD hath called me from the womb; from the bowels of my mother hath he made mention of my name. (Isaiah 49:1 KJV)

13 posted on 06/15/2014 7:10:45 PM PDT by ConorMacNessa (HM/2 USN, 3/5 Marines RVN 1969 - St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in Battle!)
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To: rickmichaels

some people are so stupid it isn’t worth commenting on


14 posted on 06/15/2014 7:21:20 PM PDT by Nifster
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To: rickmichaels
"I blame society"
15 posted on 06/15/2014 7:22:47 PM PDT by dr_lew
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To: rickmichaels

My husband is amazing. He works 24 and is off 48. He does almost all of our laundry, vacuums and steam mops, and fixes the kids their lunches. That stated, he is not mommy and I am not daddy. We have two different roles regardless of his ability to separate clothes, operate a floor cleaning machine, and slap together PB&Js.


16 posted on 06/15/2014 7:25:37 PM PDT by goodwithagun (My gun has killed fewer people than Ted Kennedy's car.)
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To: rickmichaels

Yep, that is why it’s completely okay to walk up to a bear and pick up her cub, or for a stranger to walk up to a dog and pick up one of her pups. Those animals have never been brainwashed by an evil patriarchal society.


17 posted on 06/15/2014 7:27:42 PM PDT by odawg
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To: yldstrk
Bingo. Another attempt at destroying the very heart of society. “When there are no absolutes to govern society, society becomes the absolute.” Francis Schaeffer.
18 posted on 06/15/2014 7:27:54 PM PDT by Fungi
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To: AbolishCSEU

We got ours to sleep through the night at 5 months old, by doing just that; not running in at the first hint of a whimper. Don’t leave em wailing for goodness sake, but it’s ok to let them cry it out to an extent.


19 posted on 06/15/2014 7:30:32 PM PDT by mquinn (Obama's supporters: a deliberate drowning of consciousness by means of rhythmic noise)
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To: rickmichaels

The best adjusted kids have both a sane,decent,loving and reasonably intelligent father *and* mother.Both boys *and* girls benefit,over time,from having two such parents.One need only look at the inner cities,large,medium sized and even small,to see what happens when boys grow up without fathers.


20 posted on 06/15/2014 7:30:50 PM PDT by Gay State Conservative (Rat Party Policy:Lie,Deny,Refuse To Comply)
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To: Hieronymus

“...These people are (some Polish word) crazy.”

OK, aside from everything else, valid & extraneous, I love that.

I’m making that my new tagline.


21 posted on 06/15/2014 7:39:01 PM PDT by jocon307 (These people are (some Polish word) crazy)
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To: rickmichaels

People fall into roles. I don’t think a man is incapable of waking up at night and doing something useful ... he just knows he doesn’t have to, so he doesn’t.

When our dog had cancer and needed pain medication at night, and we had a nursing baby, I told my husband, “You have to change your settings so that ‘rattling of dog collar and whimpering’ means ‘Get up and let her out and give her a pill,’ instead of, ‘Wait for someone else to do it.’ I couldn’t stop nursing the baby to take care of the dog.

Actually, I mostly could, with only an occasional swift kick when the dog obviously needed help and the baby couldn’t be detached. You’re either a nurturer or you don’t give a sh*t.


22 posted on 06/15/2014 7:49:16 PM PDT by Tax-chick (I have a classic sports car.)
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To: rickmichaels

When the children are young, Mommy is crucial for nurturing (assuming that there are any women in the West who still have the nurturing instinct left unsullied). When the children, especially boys, reach the age of reason, about 8,9,10 or so depending in the child, then Daddy becomes crucial. Without Daddy at that stage, boys become sissies or gangbangers and girls become whores. Yes, there are exceptions, so everybody calm their PC buttocks down.


23 posted on 06/15/2014 7:58:25 PM PDT by fr_freak
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To: Tax-chick

My wife abandoned myself and my 3 daughters when they were 3,5,and 8.I was both mother and father in thier lives.I could hear the smallest whimper in the middle of the night from halfway across the house.They are now 26,28,and 31 and they still wish me happy fathers day and mothers day both.I was the one at drs appts,school assemblies and sports events etc etc.Men can be just as nurturing as mothers.


24 posted on 06/15/2014 8:39:18 PM PDT by Craftmore
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To: Tax-chick
People fall into roles. I don’t think a man is incapable of waking up at night and doing something useful ... he just knows he doesn’t have to, so he doesn’t.

Hey! Plenty of times I've waked up and done something useful ... roused Nana.

25 posted on 06/15/2014 10:37:36 PM PDT by dr_lew
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To: rickmichaels

I would love to slap the living crappy out of these “experts”


26 posted on 06/15/2014 11:56:43 PM PDT by vpintheak (I will not comply!)
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To: Craftmore
I like how you call them, "my daughters," as indeed they are.

My story is similar except only one son. We were abandoned when he was six years old, he's now almost twenty. Ever a glutton for punishment, I home schooled him all twelve years. He also wishes me happy Mother's Day as well as Father's Day.

All things considered, I would not change a single day. It has been the greatest joy imaginable.

You've managed not one but three, girls no less. I can't know for sure because I haven't raised any girls, but in my mind that has to be more difficult for a feller.

You must be a heck of a guy, Craftmore! Your daughters are lucky to have you as their dad.

Happy Father's Day!

27 posted on 06/16/2014 1:26:51 AM PDT by BikerTrash
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To: Hieronymus

Somehow I managed to work full time, breast feed my children and they had their own crib to sleep in.


28 posted on 06/16/2014 9:08:00 AM PDT by AbolishCSEU (Percentage of Income in CS is inversely proportionate to Mother's parenting of children)
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To: AbolishCSEU

But did you sleep?


29 posted on 06/16/2014 7:19:32 PM PDT by Hieronymus ( (It is terrible to contemplate how few politicians are hanged. --G.K. Chesterton))
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