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Review: Divorcing a Real Witch
Patheos ^

Posted on 07/19/2014 6:24:41 PM PDT by nickcarraway

Review: Divorcing a Real Witch: For Pagans and the People That Used to Love Them by Diane Rajchel

This is a book I asked to review not because I have been through the pain and process of divorce myself, but because it offers another perspective in the raft of pagan lifestyle books that are currently appearing. I have to admit though that as the child of divorced parents, and as an author interested in the lives of children, I didn’t come to this title without investment and interest. It is sad that within the wider Pagan community, divorce and separation is all too common, and so many of us don’t consider the ways in which Pagans individually and communally may offer support and care at such a time. Rajchel’s title therefore is extremely timely.

It is clear from the outset that this is a very personal subject for Rachjel, and in the forward and through the early chapters we are given an honest and heart felt account of her personal journey through the end of a marriage and a divorce in her 20s. She uses her own divorce as the starting block to delve into the various issues of divorce as a Pagan.

The chapters cover a variety of subjects, in varying degrees of depth. For example, in the initial chapters, notably Chapter 2 The Divorced Pagan and Society, she covers a lot of ground on the relationship between the divorcee and friends, family, societal expectations and pressures, including specific details such as the significant role of the witness. I was particularly interested in a section entitled Divorce and Mystery, where she details the use of tarot in divorce, and it inspired me to think about divorce as a process of change, something we Pagans celebrate and honor in our mythic and ritual cycles.

Later chapters, such as Chapter 5 The Inner Work of Divorce and Chapter 6 Handparting Rituals, detail rituals and magical workings to help release old relationship patterns, handle anger, protect yourself from abuse and negativity, and most notably an in depth description of a handparting ritual that can be adapted to suit any couple. The magical operations and handparting rituals here are magically sound and have some moving components – for traditionalists there are some lovely inclusions with rose thorns, lunar phases and mirrors. The rituals outlined are suitable for multiple path pagans, as they are adaptable and non-path specific.

Throughout the book Rajchel employs voices from a self-selecting sample group of Pagans who had experienced divorce that she conducted a survey with, and these voices often add breadth of experience and interesting opinion to the book’s discussion. At times, however, I felt that their placement and structuring made the readabilty of the book a little disjointed. Perhaps this was because they left me wanting to know more about their journey to and through divorce in more detail.

I was surprised that there was little discussion of the question of children in the book. The complexity of managing children’s emotional needs in divorce is not a focal point in this text, despite the fact that Rajchel does touch on the subject. The section entitled Children (pg 30) has only two paragraphs detailing the challenges of children in divorce, before going on to discuss the role of the witness. Whist detailing that children are not necessarily scarred by the process of divorce but by parental conflict and unhappiness, and persuasively describing the statistics that show the prevalence of divorce in wider family structures, I felt there was a missed opportunity to explore how we can hold children or include children in the process of divorce as Pagans, or to detail how some children may suffer the double blow of being in a minority faith group and from a ‘broken home’.

In Divorcing a Real Witch, Rajchel describes the process of her own divorce through a Pagan lens and offers insight into the complexity of divorce irrespective of spirituality, yet how it can be aided with the help of magical tools and Pagan spirituality. She does not judge nor preach, but speaks here with both pragmatism and honesty; she feels like a friend talking to you – a warm and level-headed friend who has been through her own journey, and the kind that you would want around you when you were navigating the turmoil of a divorce.


TOPICS: Books/Literature; Miscellaneous
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1 posted on 07/19/2014 6:24:41 PM PDT by nickcarraway
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To: nickcarraway

As if I care about the problems of the Pagan community.


2 posted on 07/19/2014 6:28:07 PM PDT by GeronL (Vote for Conservatives not for Republicans)
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To: nickcarraway

Odd. LOL

Why was this subject important enough for you to post?

Yer a confirmed Batchelor.

Is it because no matter how beautiful a woman is there is line of men who just won’t put up with her Shiite anymore?

After all, if things didn’t end badly they wouldn’t end.

personally, I’d just torch their broom factory.


3 posted on 07/19/2014 6:31:02 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously-you won't live through it anyway-Enjoy Yourself ala Louis Prima)
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To: nickcarraway

Got a black magic woman?


4 posted on 07/19/2014 6:33:12 PM PDT by cripplecreek (Remember the River Raisin.)
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To: nickcarraway

Bent One should read this book.


5 posted on 07/19/2014 6:35:04 PM PDT by DTA
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To: GeronL

That there is a Pagan community is a problem.


6 posted on 07/19/2014 6:36:47 PM PDT by ifinnegan
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To: nickcarraway
Review: Divorcing a Real Witch

From the title I thought for sure Bill and Hill were finally ending their charade.

7 posted on 07/19/2014 6:37:59 PM PDT by South40 (Hillary Clinton was a "great secretary of state". - Texas Governor Rick Perry)
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To: DTA
Bent One should read this book.

Hey, whoa, that's two entirely different things. One of them is a bent, grotesque, hideous crone cackling madly at nothing and wishing evil on everyone around her. The other one's a witch.

8 posted on 07/19/2014 6:39:05 PM PDT by Billthedrill
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To: DTA

But I thought they were too poor to get divorced?


9 posted on 07/19/2014 6:44:05 PM PDT by uglybiker (nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-BATMAN!)
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To: ifinnegan

“That there is a Pagan community is a problem.”

Aye; another historical “victim” group to be appeased.

I can only guess that people get into this nonsense because they are terribly afraid of being inconsequential (like those goofy teenage “goth” geeks.

“Notice me! I’m different and interesting!”


10 posted on 07/19/2014 6:44:52 PM PDT by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic warfare against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: kearnyirish2

But the thing is, they are not historical.

It’s make believe.


11 posted on 07/19/2014 6:47:53 PM PDT by ifinnegan
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To: kearnyirish2

Wicca is the “look at me” “religion”


12 posted on 07/19/2014 6:49:40 PM PDT by GeronL (Vote for Conservatives not for Republicans)
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FReepers! Let's go!
Every donation counts!



13 posted on 07/19/2014 6:50:21 PM PDT by RedMDer (May we always be happy and may our enemies always know it. - Sarah Palin, 10-18-2010)
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To: ifinnegan

Absolutely, but they’ll cling to the Salem trials as others cling to slavery.


14 posted on 07/19/2014 6:51:29 PM PDT by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic warfare against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: nickcarraway

I have worked with a fair few single women who think they are witches of some sort or another - They dabble in New Age practices or ways of thought or just think it is trendy to wear a lot of black and be a bit deadly. Only one of them was the real thing. The thing I have found with them is that a) A lot of them have abuse or abandonment issues b) Paganism/witchcraft gives some women the illusion of power or control that they don’t feel they otherwise have in their lives.


15 posted on 07/19/2014 6:54:22 PM PDT by melsec (Once a Jolly Swagman camped by a Billabong.)
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To: melsec

I guess that kind of makes sense


16 posted on 07/19/2014 6:55:22 PM PDT by GeronL (Vote for Conservatives not for Republicans)
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To: GeronL

Wicca is the “look at me” “religion”

Oh definitely; must be fun to make it up as you go, and turn Halloween into your Christmas...


17 posted on 07/19/2014 6:58:38 PM PDT by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic warfare against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: GeronL
Wicca is the “look at me” “religion”

No doubt. However, modern "pagan" covers a lot more than just Wicca.

18 posted on 07/19/2014 7:07:00 PM PDT by Sherman Logan (Perception wins all the battles. Reality wins all the wars.)
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To: nickcarraway

http://www.crunchyroll.com/witch-craft-works


19 posted on 07/19/2014 7:08:03 PM PDT by wastedyears (Everything Obama does wrong is Bush's fault.)
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To: GeronL

Well done.


20 posted on 07/19/2014 7:09:01 PM PDT by RedHeeler
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To: GeronL

“Kind of” yes sadly a lot of women have been convinced that the church is misogynistic and disempowers women. Nothing could be further from the truth - knowing Jesus really does allow you to be the most you can be as a person. I find it tragic!


21 posted on 07/19/2014 7:19:12 PM PDT by melsec (Once a Jolly Swagman camped by a Billabong.)
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To: nickcarraway

For a moment I thought Bill and Hillary were getting a divorce. But then I realized she wasn’t a witch but something else.


22 posted on 07/19/2014 7:54:54 PM PDT by kaehurowing
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To: melsec

Yup, that’s just what my ex-wife thought.

So I gave her one helluva an abandonment issue when I walked out and never once looked back. Thank God we had no children together.

This was Spring 2003 and to this day she still doesn’t understand why I left.


23 posted on 07/19/2014 7:59:48 PM PDT by snuffy smiff (Socialism is the philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy.)
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To: nickcarraway
Why Wiccans Suck
24 posted on 07/19/2014 8:03:11 PM PDT by Objective Scrutator (All liberals are criminals, and all criminals are liberals)
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To: nickcarraway

25 posted on 07/19/2014 8:04:57 PM PDT by Objective Scrutator (All liberals are criminals, and all criminals are liberals)
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To: nickcarraway

Interesting story, a Carioca I knew dated the son of a local macumbeira preistess. She broke up with him after a while and he was not happy about it. The story she told me is a week later she developed a goiter and despite her testing showing normal the darn thing popped up and stayed that way for two months. Not my story, just repeating it...


26 posted on 07/19/2014 8:06:12 PM PDT by Caipirabob (Communists... Socialists... Democrats...Traitors... Who can tell the difference?)
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To: nickcarraway

I Fought Wiccans Were All Full of Luv.......


27 posted on 07/19/2014 8:06:36 PM PDT by GraceG (No, My Initials are not A.B.)
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To: snuffy smiff

I am amazed at the amount of church women that fiddle around with this stuff - Goddess BS and other nonsense. It would be tough to stay with someone like that whose beliefs are really diametrically opposed to the truth of the Gospel and who Oprahites or similar!


28 posted on 07/19/2014 8:10:19 PM PDT by melsec (Once a Jolly Swagman camped by a Billabong.)
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To: nickcarraway

If it is truly magical — then it is demonic.

There is no “white” magic.


29 posted on 07/19/2014 8:41:25 PM PDT by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both.)
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To: ifinnegan
That there is a Pagan community is a problem.

We live in one, the USA, where we worship STUFF. Stuff seems to be more important than God.

God IS number one in life and He should be number one in our DAILY, hourly life. We Catholics can attend Mass every day...and I do because I realized that one day in a sudden epiphany of maturity. We are His, created in His image and likeness.

He sent us His Only Begotten Son Jesus to show us that He is the Way, the Truth and the Life.

It's pretty simple, isn't it?

30 posted on 07/19/2014 9:10:43 PM PDT by cloudmountain
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To: melsec
I am amazed at the amount of church women that fiddle around with this stuff - Goddess BS and other nonsense. It would be tough to stay with someone like that whose beliefs are really diametrically opposed to the truth of the Gospel and who Oprahites or similar!

These church women are only PLAYING at being Church women. They don't put their faith to practice in EVERY moment of their life. If they did they wouldn't even DREAM of all that Goddess BS.

They are listening to Satan. He can be very tempting, KNOWING the foibles of us humans. The Evil One knows all the lacunae in human nature and sends his demons to tempt these weak, uninterested, feckless NON-Church women.

It's NO GAME to have ANYTHING to do with Satan and his minions. We can pray to St. Michael the Archangel to drive those demons of Satan away from us--just like he drove Satan out of heaven and down to the fiery furnace of eternal suffering--that is, eternity without God--in hell.

31 posted on 07/19/2014 9:23:36 PM PDT by cloudmountain
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To: nickcarraway

http://youtu.be/XK2pEaep0KQ


32 posted on 07/19/2014 11:02:23 PM PDT by Cheapskate
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To: nickcarraway; Anoreth
The magical operations and handparting rituals here are magically sound ...

I dare you to read that and not spit your beverage on the keyboard.

33 posted on 07/20/2014 5:43:44 AM PDT by Tax-chick (La cruz y el dolor son amor. Amor es mandato de Dios.)
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To: nickcarraway
For Pagans and the People That Used to Love Them

Is that truly the subtitle? Where the heck were the editors WHO signed off on that wording? When one is referring to human beings, that group to which both editors and people presumably belong, one is supposed to use the term WHO, not THAT!

Sorry for the grammarian rant, but that's one oft used, glaring mistake that just irks me!

34 posted on 07/20/2014 12:24:37 PM PDT by SuziQ
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To: melsec
The thing I have found with them is that a) A lot of them have abuse or abandonment issues b) Paganism/witchcraft gives some women the illusion of power or control that they don’t feel they otherwise have in their lives.

I think the same goes for many lesbians, but then those two groups intersect frequently, and I believe, for the same reason.

35 posted on 07/20/2014 12:29:16 PM PDT by SuziQ
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To: GeronL

Well said! I don’t care about them either.


36 posted on 07/20/2014 12:32:13 PM PDT by Ditter
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To: SuziQ

You are spot on - I was thinking that while writing the post as I have worked with quite a few of them too - 2 that were both Lesbians and supposed witches!


37 posted on 07/20/2014 6:16:10 PM PDT by melsec (Once a Jolly Swagman camped by a Billabong.)
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