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Many couples are trapped in sexless marriages
The Daily Mail ^ | 07/03/2017 | Monique Roffey

Posted on 09/30/2017 12:49:02 PM PDT by BJ1

But slowly, over the course of six years, our physical relationship dwindled to nothing. I buried it because I had no idea how to talk about it, let alone fix it. Those years were pre-internet and pre-social media; I couldn’t simply tap my problem into Google and find answers.

It’s agonising to be in a relationship full of love and lacking in sex. It’s a tragedy, in fact, or it was for me. And a sexless relationship carries a lot of shame. Just as having too much sex is taboo, so is having none.

I kept quiet. Instead, my repressed sexuality took on a life of its own, and I dreamed of sexy trysts with other men, and, being a writer, these dreams went down on paper in the form of a novel, The Tryst, published later this week.

Of course, we split up, eventually. When a couple isn’t having sex, especially a younger couple, the frustrated energy has to go somewhere. It usually ends up going outside the relationship, and it did.

He had an affair — galling, given our situation — and that was the end of things. I was 41. I ran away and regrouped. What followed was a decade of sexual seeking and exploration, a campaign of self-education.

My mission was never again to fall into this no-sex relationship trap. What had happened and why? I was determined to find out. I allowed myself to be a guinea pig, and took many bold and courageous leaps. In doing so I tried everything, and today, aged 52, I’m much more sexually confident.

(Excerpt) Read more at dailymail.co.uk ...


TOPICS: Society
KEYWORDS: coldfish; deadinbed; freepersare; genderwars; marriage; men; single; women
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To: VanDeKoik

Oh exactly. I have been in that situation before. I didn’t provide clothes, food, and shelter for my past roommates, why would one continue living like that?


41 posted on 09/30/2017 1:43:50 PM PDT by KC_Conspirator
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To: nickcarraway

I’m going to take it you haven’t really listen to very many MGTOW guys.

They typically have more disposable income than any married man, and are certainly not living at home.

I’m not sure where the whole “feminist tools” thing is coming from. They are MGTOWs because of Feminism and the scam that marriage has turned into.


42 posted on 09/30/2017 1:45:03 PM PDT by VanDeKoik
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To: Jeff Chandler

More than likely, she wanted him to woo her for sex every time and he got tired of the game.
I know too many single women who are having sex with married men. They consider it to be “free” sex. It’s easy to get rid of the men.

The men I know that have married sex have wives that consider it part of their job, just like washing dishes and mopping the floor. A friend calls it “Mormon sex” (no idea why)


43 posted on 09/30/2017 1:45:48 PM PDT by AppyPappy (Don't mistake your dorm political discussions with the desires of the nation)
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To: BJ1
Just as having too much sex is taboo

Seriously? In a marriage? I never heard that!

I pretty much thought that's what marriage was for.

44 posted on 09/30/2017 1:46:15 PM PDT by Bodleian_Girl (Click on my profile page to find out why Alabama rejects Luther Strange!)
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To: VanDeKoik
When a guy looks at the whole set-up critically, they wonder “why the hell am I signing up for this to live with a roommate?”.

Worse! "Why am I paying this much money to not have sex?"

45 posted on 09/30/2017 1:47:24 PM PDT by AppyPappy (Don't mistake your dorm political discussions with the desires of the nation)
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To: neverevergiveup

If having a child is the only reason you have sex in a marriage, you’ve missed the plot.


46 posted on 09/30/2017 1:47:44 PM PDT by Bodleian_Girl (Click on my profile page to find out why Alabama rejects Luther Strange!)
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To: BJ1

If a man has lost interest in sex he either has a health problem or has another outlet. Women on the other hand are notorious for shutting down after marriage, there are suddenly strings attached, do this, buy me that. Then, there’s the punitive withholding of sex when they’re mad about something. Try as they might, feminists just can’t quite get past the fact that men and women are wired differently when it comes to sex, unless of course they’re somehow able to spin it as female superiority, in which case they go totally over the top.


47 posted on 09/30/2017 1:47:47 PM PDT by RegulatorCountry
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To: BJ1

Unless she’s sick or mentally in trouble

No sick will kill it


48 posted on 09/30/2017 1:47:47 PM PDT by wardaddy (Virtue signalers should be shot on sight...conservative ones racked and hanged then fed to dogs)
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To: M Kehoe; Lazmataz
Could be a good thread.

Not without Laz.

49 posted on 09/30/2017 1:48:30 PM PDT by Bodleian_Girl (Click on my profile page to find out why Alabama rejects Luther Strange!)
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To: VanDeKoik

Your description of marriage is actually prostitution.


50 posted on 09/30/2017 1:49:28 PM PDT by neverevergiveup
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To: Jeff Chandler
She lost me there.

Amen. Just sayin'.

51 posted on 09/30/2017 1:49:50 PM PDT by Bodleian_Girl (Click on my profile page to find out why Alabama rejects Luther Strange!)
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To: AppyPappy

Best comment and reply on the article:

gjr1971, manchester, 2 months ago
British women are too fat. British men let themselves go.

fiin arlandi, borneo, Indonesia, 2 months ago
Maybe that’s a reason why i see growing number western men visit to my country and married with our local women.


52 posted on 09/30/2017 1:52:07 PM PDT by Jeff Chandler (https://imgoat.com/uploads/645920e395/39513.gif)
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To: Bodleian_Girl
“If having a child is the only reason you have sex in a marriage, you’ve missed the plot.”

I agree, and that's not what I said. My point is that sex without love is empty, as is marriage without love.

53 posted on 09/30/2017 1:52:25 PM PDT by neverevergiveup
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To: RegulatorCountry
Try as they might, feminists just can’t quite get past the fact that men and women are wired differently when it comes to sex, unless of course they’re somehow able to spin it as female superiority..

I am nothing without my man. Seriously and completely.

54 posted on 09/30/2017 1:53:01 PM PDT by Bodleian_Girl (Click on my profile page to find out why Alabama rejects Luther Strange!)
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To: Jeff Chandler

Art Bell certainly thought so.


55 posted on 09/30/2017 1:54:12 PM PDT by MUDDOG
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To: BJ1
But slowly, over the course of six years, our physical relationship dwindled to nothing. I buried it because I had no idea how to talk about it, let alone fix it. Those years were pre-internet and pre-social media; I couldn’t simply tap my problem into Google and find answers.

Maybe she should have talked about the problem with her husband instead of writing about trysts with other men.
56 posted on 09/30/2017 1:54:33 PM PDT by Trillian
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To: Bodleian_Girl

You’re old school in the good sense of being old school, then. Not a common outlook anymore, unfortunately. I’d assume your husband feels the same of you as well. It’s a two-way street.


57 posted on 09/30/2017 1:54:54 PM PDT by RegulatorCountry
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To: RegulatorCountry

Men want sex.
Women know men want sex.
Let the games begin.

Women want sex.
Men will pay money for sex.
Let the games begin.

I have a friend who discovered men will give her things(money, cigarettes, alcohol) in exchange for sex. Picture in your mind an anorexic Meth-head alcoholic. She is so enamored with the idea that I hate to take her anywhere.


58 posted on 09/30/2017 1:56:13 PM PDT by AppyPappy (Don't mistake your dorm political discussions with the desires of the nation)
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To: AppyPappy

“A friend calls it “Mormon sex” (no idea why).”

In the LDS world when `Molly Mormon’ marries `Peter Priesthood’ her duty to submit at his will is well defined, along with all the other chores as noted.


59 posted on 09/30/2017 1:56:34 PM PDT by elcid1970 ("The Second Amendment is more important than Islam.")
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To: neverevergiveup
My point is that sex without love is empty

Over the life of a marriage, the love can come and go. Emotions and feelings can be fleeting, and change.

But you can have sex despite all that.

I'm not saying get out there and do it outside of marriage, but it's not by any means empty just because emotions change.

60 posted on 09/30/2017 1:57:31 PM PDT by Bodleian_Girl (Click on my profile page to find out why Alabama rejects Luther Strange!)
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