Posted on 12/21/2018 6:39:34 AM PST by sodpoodle
On an overseas flight, a lawyer and an older man were in adjoining seats.
The lawyer asked the senior if he’d like to play a little game. The older man was tired, and he told the lawyer he only wanted to sleep.
But the lawyer insisted the game was a lot of fun.
“Here’s how it works,” he said. “I’ll ask you a question. If you can’t come up with the answer, you have to give me a dollar. Then it’s your turn to ask me one. But if I can’t answer it, I have to give you $20.”
The senior figured if he just got this over with, maybe he could get some sleep. So he agreed to play.
The first question from the lawyer was “How far apart are the earth and the moon?”
The senior stayed completely silent, reached for a dollar, and gave it to the lawyer. Then he said, “My turn. What walks upstairs backward and comes downstairs forward?”
The lawyer was stumped. He thought and thought. He tried to remember all the riddles he knew. He searched every corner of his brain.
He even cheated and asked the flight attendants and other passengers.
Finally he gave up. He woke up the older man and gave him a twenty. The senior stuffed the twenty in his coat and went immediately back to sleep.
The lawyer couldn’t stand it. He woke up the older man and said, “I have to know. What walks upstairs backward and comes downstairs forward?”
The senior got out his wallet, gave the lawyer a dollar, and went back to sleep.
Good one.
From a list of funny doctor/lawyer jokes....
Brain Dead
A research physician is summoned to testify in court in a murder case. He had received the brain of the deceased for his research, and the defense attorney, and arrogant, aloof Harvard type, was really giving him the business.
At one point the attorney asked “And how can you be so sure that the victim was not committing crimes himself at 10 pm that evening?”
The doctor replied “Because his brain was sitting in a jar on my office desk”.
Frazzled, and trying to save face, the attorney asks “So then it would have been impossible for the victim to be out doing anything at that time?”
The doctor stares at the lawyer for a while then says “Well I guess he could have been out practicing law.”
Clevah!
At that, the bear stops growling, stands up on his hind legs but keeps approaching slowly.
The man repeats, "Oh Lord, please make this a Christian bear."
As the bear gets to within 2 feet of the man, it stops and slowly gets down on its knees.
The bear snatches the kerchief from the man and proceeds to place it under its chin, folds its hands and says, "Dear Lord, for this magnificent meal I am truly grateful, Amen."
He always had the answer to that.
OK - I give up! How many? LOL!
On the front lawn, a wife asked her husband why he had folks dressed up as first responders in their nativity scene.
Husband responded, “The bible says that the three wise men came from afar.”
LOL - Love that Southern accent;)
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One Christmas, a mother decided she was no longer going to remind her kids to send thank you notes. Consequently, the kids’ grandmother never received any thanks for the Christmas checks she sent to the kids.
The very next Christmas, all the kids stopped by in person to thank their grandmother for their checks.
When asked by a friend what caused this change in behavior, the grandmother replied, “Simple. This year I didn’t sign the checks.”
Bkmrk
Age and treachery....... every time.
(Grrrr!)
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