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WashPost Mocks Miscarriage and Abortion: ‘Mandate Funerals’ for Sperm
mrcNEWSBUSTERS ^ | Dec, 6, 2019 | Alexa Moutevelis Coombs

Posted on 12/06/2019 11:17:06 PM PST by Morgana

Into a discussion about the treatment of the bodies of aborted and miscarried babies, the Washington Post brought an obnoxiously flippant parody piece purporting to support funerals for sperm. In other words, presenting us with an apple and saying, "This is a banana."

Post columnist Alexandra Petri wrote on December 4, in the Opinion section, “State legislators, stop being cowards. Mandate funerals for all spermatozoa.” She began with a Pennsylvania bill that would no longer treat the dead bodies of premature babies as medical waste, but allow for their cremation or funeral services at the parents’ request. Or, as Petri put it, “mandating death certificates and the offering of funerals for fertilized ova. How inequitable!” she mocked. The piece only went downhill from there.

Somehow, she goes from calling the unborn babies “fertilized ova” to conflating them with “fertilizing spermatozoa.” Anyone with even a basic understanding of biology could tell you that a fertilized egg is fundamentally different from the sperm that fertilized it.

Petri apparently missed Bio 101 because she went on with the fantastical equation, feigning outrage that sperm will not be given the same respect as dead babies [my responses added]:

But all right-minded citizens must ask the question: Why such concern for these fertilizing spermatozoa, more than others? [Again, different from a fertilized egg] Those spermatozoa have passed into the beyond after making connections that elude millions of their brethren. Why honor them? Why reward further those who have already achieved a so-called reward? [Because it is a human life by virtue of conception.]

What of their compatriots who know no such good fortune? Where is their honor? [Sperm is not a human life!]

In what is clearly thought to be clever, she went on to sarcastically – and poetically – call for laws to “honor” sperm:

State legislators, if you have such concern for the select few, remember the unfortunate millions! We must, of course, give honor above all to those who went to the halls of glory without glimpsing even a hint of an ovum. This is the least we owe those who lived in hope — and died — in states of single blessedness. Who knows what strange soil may be their resting place, what corner of a foreign field shall be forever theirs, what richer earth lies in that rich earth concealed?

Petri also satirically called for things like taps to be played, a funeral procession, flags lowered to half-staff, a eulogy by the governor or president, etc.

All of this offensively mocks the loss of the aborted and stillborn, but nowhere more so than when she wrote, “I think, also, that stars should be placed in the windows of those who bear so great a loss; it is a simple matter of respect.” Imagine a grief-stricken mother seeing her pain after the death of her unborn child ridiculed like this in the Washington Post!

It was a failed attempt at humor about a very dark subject. Dead baby jokes are like the third rail of comedy, they certainly don’t belong in the pages of the Post, and Ms. Petri is simply not a talented enough columnist to properly execute them. Especially when she thinks an apple is a banana.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat
KEYWORDS: abortion; miscarriage; prolife; wapo

1 posted on 12/06/2019 11:17:06 PM PST by Morgana
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To: Morgana

Does she identify as an adult?


2 posted on 12/06/2019 11:19:16 PM PST by a fool in paradise (Recall that unqualified Hillary Clinton sat on the board of Wal-Mart when Bill Clinton was governor)
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To: a fool in paradise

Does she identify as human?


3 posted on 12/06/2019 11:56:31 PM PST by Morgana ( Always a bit of truth in dark humor.)
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To: Morgana

Sick person.


4 posted on 12/07/2019 12:01:42 AM PST by A Navy Vet (I'm not Islamophobic - I'm Islamonauseous. Also LGBTQxyz nauseous.)
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To: Morgana

They dont even understand basic science.

Egg - not a person

Sperm - not a person

Fetus/baby - a separate person

Who expects them to make any sense at all anymore? they love murder.


5 posted on 12/07/2019 12:12:53 AM PST by Secret Agent Man (Gone Galt; Not Averse to Going Bronson.)
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To: Morgana

Perhaps we should ask Ms Petri to request a high mass for every unfertilized egg she has passed in her monthly cycle, in order to pay her due penance for the potential life lost there?


6 posted on 12/07/2019 12:56:04 AM PST by Don W (When blacks riot, neighbourhoods and cities burn. When whites riot, nations and continents burn.)
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To: Morgana

This is really sick. These people think they’re educated, erudite, worldly, and ‘progressive’? Hardly.


7 posted on 12/07/2019 2:43:32 AM PST by neverevergiveup
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To: neverevergiveup

You nailed it right there. More than support for abortion, more than support for any particular issue, the defining quality of Leftists is their toxic narcissism.


8 posted on 12/07/2019 3:07:21 AM PST by Nothingburger
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To: Nothingburger

I agree entirely.


9 posted on 12/07/2019 3:14:46 AM PST by neverevergiveup
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To: Morgana

Her dad was a Republican congressman from Wisconsin. She should know better. Probably not much of a dish herself.


10 posted on 12/07/2019 4:14:31 AM PST by LRoggy (Peter's Son's Business)
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To: Morgana

They can go to hell. The left has lost its mind. It is willing to think insane thoughts just so it can justify abortion.


11 posted on 12/07/2019 4:55:06 AM PST by I want the USA back (If free speech is taken away, dumb and silent we are led, like sheep to the slaughter: G Washington)
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To: Morgana
Monty Python Every Sperm Is Sacred
12 posted on 12/07/2019 5:42:31 AM PST by dayglored ("Listen. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government."`)
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To: Morgana
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fUspLVStPbk

She's about 20 years behind Monty Python. Look for "Every Little Sperm is Sacred" if the link doesn't work.

13 posted on 12/07/2019 5:46:16 AM PST by Hardastarboard (Three most annoying words on the internet - "Watch the video")
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To: Hardastarboard

GMTA :-). And actually more like 40 years ahead.


14 posted on 12/07/2019 5:53:50 AM PST by dayglored ("Listen. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government."`)
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To: dayglored

Geez. s/ahead/behind/


15 posted on 12/07/2019 5:54:40 AM PST by dayglored ("Listen. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government."`)
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