Anti-War Protesters Win -- United States to Reverse Course (Humor)

My Fevered Brow | April 21, 2003 | Lazamataz

[Lazamataz]

crAP -- Bagdhad    In a gesture of conciliation to antiwar protesters, the United States government said Tuesday that it would be pulling out of Iraq and reinstating the Saddam Hussein regime.

“I think it was Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins who finally convinced us,” stated Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, “We will be sending a formal apology to Saddam Hussein and taking every action we can to restore this brave, respected, and picked-upon leader.” After a brief pause, Rumsfeld said, “I might add this: Whoops. Our bad.”

“What were we thinking?!?” remarked White House spokesperson Ari Fleischer, “I mean, clearly we were in the wrong to try to liberate a tortured and oppressed populace. If they didn’t want to be oppressed, they would have voted him out years ago!”

The 81st Airborne division will be the first group to unilaterally surrender. Sources in the military state that the division will throw itself on the mercy of Saddam Hussien, hoping for humane treatment and a swift return to the United States after fair war-crimes trials.

When reached for comment, Barbra Streisand remarked, “It’s just not enough. We should surrender America to Saddam. Anyone would be better than Bush, and I have a hunch Saddam is a Democrat in his heart.”

[Lazamataz]

Hey, it could happen.

[Lazamataz]

I wonder if anyone will see this article way the heck over here.

[ez]

In a related story, Kofi Annan has said that the US should cover all costs of having Saddam's bio/chem stocks dug up and transported back from Syria. After all, he has the right to defend himself.

[Lazamataz]

Wow, I guess not.

[Lazamataz]

Hey! Someone saw it! Cool!

[Illbay]

You forgot to have Barbra Streisand murmur something about Saddam's sex-appeal.

[Skooz]

Hey, laz, I saw it, too.

[Illbay]

I saw it, but when I left and tried to come back, it was gone.

Was it real?

Hey, am I logged on?

[RottiBiz]

Bump!

Always enjoy your satirical posts.

[Lazamataz]

You forgot to have Barbra Streisand murmur something about Saddam's sex-appeal.

Good point. She's always coming on to murderous thugs and con-men. Like, for example, Clinton.

[smith288]

Fast forward 5 years.......

....With Iraqi troops occupying Washington DC, temporary governer and supreme leader of the United States, Hillary Clinton was asked if she had any plans for dissedents of her regime.

"Absolutely! I plan to propose a resolution to the United States supreme tribunal that will force these terrorists of order to be tried, convicted and sent to death by mass gassing per Saddams order. I think this will keep our society on even keel. We cannot stand to have extremists in our society!"

Susan Surandon, a supporter of Hillary and led the charge of Anti-War/Pro-Saddam movement, was asked for further comment but she was unavailable due to her questioning Hillary Clintons proposal of disallowing the use of vulgar words in movies. She has been in prison for 4 months.

The holy Ms. Clinton, who divorced her husband Bill Clinton because of her spiritual growth under the Islam-Green party, has made it known that vulgar language in movies is the #1 reason for faulty subjects (people who are American citizens and not of the Islam-Green party) in the United States.

[Tunehead54]

I'm here! Bump!

---

So Laz, where are we?

[Lazamataz]

Always enjoy your satirical posts.

Then I shall stop forthwith.

No, just joking.....

Thanks for the kudos kiddo :o)

[smith288]

Thats friggin rediculous.

[Lazamataz]

So Laz, where are we?

DIRECTLY EXACTLY RIGHT SMACKDAB

                    over the center of the Earth.

[Skooz]

Uh...make the bad thing go away..............

[SevenofNine]

LOLOLOL

LAZ you are bad LOLOLOL Very funny actually where is Ozzy Osbourne if Saddam want take over country how about England

I wonder how Osbournes feel in Islamic UK

SHARONNNNN GET US OF HERE

[Lazamataz]

Your porn post has been reported to moderators.

[Skooz]

Good. What the heck is that about? Who's stealing bandwidth?