You Might be a Marine If.....

Subject: You Might Be a MARINE If... 1. You've ever used the term "Oohrah" in any context other than sarcasm. 2. Your dream home is base housing. 3. You've ever rolled pennies to buy beer on a weeknight. 4. You've ever sold blood to buy beer. 5. You've ever financed a tattoo. 6. You met your wife at a strip joint. 7. You and your roommate share the same woman. 8. Your kid has a high & tight. 9. You still have your full basic issue. 10. Your boot polish doesn't come out of a bottle. 11. Your cammies have more starch than your potatoes. 12. You refer to McDonald's food as "chow." 13. You've ever bought your girlfriend a "bag nasty." 14. You've ever read your 'Battle Skills' book for fun. 15. You still know all your General Orders. 16. You refer to E-2s as "My PFC," or "Young Devil Dog." 17. You call your friends "Devil Dog." 18. Your #1 credit reference is DPP. 19. You think your military training is seriously worth college credit. 20. Your picture is outside the Career Planner's office. 21. You have whitewalls on your head, but not your car. 22. You don't drink on duty section. 23. You have a star on your good cookie. 24. You consider going to the Roadhouse a night on the town. 25. You think that officers fly planes because they are too stupid to work on them. 26. You still know the words to the "Marine's Hymn." 27. You say things are 'good to go,' or 'outstanding.' 28. You haven't been laid in over a year. 29. Your favorite game is spades. 30. You think stuff like this should be done on your own time. 31. You still imitate your drill instructors. 32. You do MCIs to better yourself. 33. You call cadence to yourself. 34. You get your haircut at the 7-Day Store. 35. You've ever given a period of instruction. 36. You've ever locked anybody on. 37. You use CLP as cologne. 38. You use Aqua Velva aftershave. 39. You iron your coveralls. 40. You have a dog named "Chesty." 41. You have a blues cover in the back window of your car. 42. You've ever done anything for love of Corps. 43. You display your rank on the windshield of your car. 44. You press your cammies out after you get them from the cleaners. 45. You think the Air Force is nasty. 46. You have a subscription to 'Leatherneck.' 47. You use the term "hard charger" on a subject other than batteries. 48. You think your unit doesn't PT enough. 49. You think Motrin cures things. 50. You wear your dogtags to the beach. 51. You've ever worked on a Harrier and truly wanted to fix it. 52. You still use any drill instructor cliches. 53. You've ever been on a 3-day work detail picking up dead fish by hand out of a rancid lake under the hot August sun in Iwakuni. (You know who you are, stay strong my brothers.) 54. All your underwear still has your laundry number on it. 55. You stencil your name on your jeans. 56. You refer to regular clothes as 'civvies.' 57. You've ever ironed your sheets for field day. 58. You practice rifle manual with a swab. 59. You get your hair cut once a week. 60. You've been to Whisper Alley. 61. You've ever worn out an ironing board. 62. You hang your dirty laundry from the foot of your bed. 63. More than half of your wardrobe was purchased at the PX. 64. You "quarter-deck" your kids. 65. You practice line training on your wife. 66. You argue with people about whether Paris Island or San Diego was better. 67. You refer to your SNCOIC as 'Daddy.' 68. You've ever called someone off leave for an up gripe. 69. You use your seabag as luggage when you go on leave. 70. You have a picture of the Commandant in your room. 71. You wear your wooly pully with Levis. 72. You wear your all weather coat with regular clothes. 73. The horn on your car plays the 'Marine Hymn'S. 74. Your picture is outside the PX. 75. You've ever starved until dinner because you woke up too late to go to the chow hall. 76. You pick up a woman in a bar and she takes you to base housing. 77. You stay there. (refer to #76) 78. You have the misconception that you can kick someone's ass because they're in the Navy. 79. If you've ever suggested that your unit goes on a hump. 80. You've ever gone to a bar or dance club in your blues. 81. You seriously think that your GI Bill will pay for your college education. 82. You've ever slept with a WM. 83. You take your 782 gear camping. 84. You found NCO School motivating. 85. You can be found in 'Shaboom's' or 'Texas Two Step' every weekend. 86. You like 'Tun Tavern' Beer. 87. You have a camouflage comforter on your bed. 88. You keep MREs around just in case you get hungry. 89. You go to the chow hall to meet women. 90. You think people should be court-martialed for running into a building to avoid colors. 91. You've ever had razor burn on your head. 92. You signed the Chesty Puller stamp petition. 93. You've ever used the term 'very well' in normal conversation. 94. You call cadence during sex. 95. You've seen the banana show. 96. You've been to Kin Town aka sin Ville. 97. You know what a buy me drinky is. 98. You've dated a buy me drinky. 99. You've been to the stage. 100. Your favorite place on the weekends is Blue Hawaii. 101. You have a motivated signature in your outlook. 102. You know about TJ. 103. While walking you do facing movements. 104. If you had your hammy smacked by a flip. 105. IF YOU SAY "GOOD TO GO" IN EVERY OTHER SENTENCE. 106. You got a DUI within your first four years of enlistment. 107. You think wearing your jungle/combat boots with regular clothes looks good. 108. You tuck in all your shirts even when you are wearing regular clothes. 109. If you have an EGA on your wallet. 110. You ate the banana. 111. You use your star card to buy beer. 112. You got on the stage. 113. You starch your underwear for a wall-locker inspection. 114. You ever dated any girl from Okinawa. 115. You have sang kareoke at "Mickey's." People on Futenma, you know what i'm talkin about. 116. You have a copy of "Full Metal Jacket" in your walllocker. 117. "The Duke" is your mentor. 118. You have ever drilled your friends on your libo time just to get some practice. 119. They know you well at P-52's. (All you KC-130 flyers know what I am talking about) 120. You refer to the middle east as "Going to play in the 'Big Kitty Litter Box/ Sand Box.'"

Subject: You Might Be a MARINE If...

1. You've ever used the term "Oohrah" in any context other than sarcasm.
2. Your dream home is base housing.
3. You've ever rolled pennies to buy beer on a weeknight.
4. You've ever sold blood to buy beer.
5. You've ever financed a tattoo.
6. You met your wife at a strip joint.
7. You and your roommate share the same woman.
8. Your kid has a high & tight.
9. You still have your full basic issue.
10. Your boot polish doesn't come out of a bottle.
11. Your cammies have more starch than your potatoes.
12. You refer to McDonald's food as "chow."
13. You've ever bought your girlfriend a "bag nasty."
14. You've ever read your 'Battle Skills' book for fun.
15. You still know all your General Orders.
16. You refer to E-2s as "My PFC," or "Young Devil Dog."
17. You call your friends "Devil Dog."
18. Your #1 credit reference is DPP.
19. You think your military training is seriously worth college credit.
20. Your picture is outside the Career Planner's office.
21. You have whitewalls on your head, but not your car.
22. You don't drink on duty section.
23. You have a star on your good cookie.
24. You consider going to the Roadhouse a night on the town.
25. You think that officers fly planes because they are too stupid to work on them.
26. You still know the words to the "Marine's Hymn."
27. You say things are 'good to go,' or 'outstanding.'
28. You haven't been laid in over a year.
29. Your favorite game is spades.
30. You think stuff like this should be done on your own time.
31. You still imitate your drill instructors.
32. You do MCIs to better yourself.
33. You call cadence to yourself.
34. You get your haircut at the 7-Day Store.
35. You've ever given a period of instruction.
36. You've ever locked anybody on.
37. You use CLP as cologne.
38. You use Aqua Velva aftershave.
39. You iron your coveralls. 40. You have a dog named "Chesty."
41. You have a blues cover in the back window of your car.
42. You've ever done anything for love of Corps.
43. You display your rank on the windshield of your car.
44. You press your cammies out after you get them from the cleaners.
45. You think the Air Force is nasty.
46. You have a subscription to 'Leatherneck.'
47. You use the term "hard charger" on a subject other than batteries.
48. You think your unit doesn't PT enough.
49. You think Motrin cures things.
50. You wear your dogtags to the beach.
51. You've ever worked on a Harrier and truly wanted to fix it.
52. You still use any drill instructor cliches.
53. You've ever been on a 3-day work detail picking up dead fish by hand out of a rancid lake under the hot August sun in Iwakuni. (You know who you are, stay strong my brothers.)
54. All your underwear still has your laundry number on it.
55. You stencil your name on your jeans.
56. You refer to regular clothes as 'civvies.'
57. You've ever ironed your sheets for field day.
58. You practice rifle manual with a swab.
59. You get your hair cut once a week.
60. You've been to Whisper Alley.
61. You've ever worn out an ironing board.
62. You hang your dirty laundry from the foot of your bed.
63. More than half of your wardrobe was purchased at the PX.
64. You "quarter-deck" your kids.
65. You practice line training on your wife.
66. You argue with people about whether Paris Island or San Diego was better.
67. You refer to your SNCOIC as 'Daddy.'
68. You've ever called someone off leave for an up gripe.
69. You use your seabag as luggage when you go on leave.
70. You have a picture of the Commandant in your room.
71. You wear your wooly pully with Levis.
72. You wear your all weather coat with regular clothes.
73. The horn on your car plays the 'Marine Hymn'S.
74. Your picture is outside the PX.
75. You've ever starved until dinner because you woke up too late to go to the chow hall.
76. You pick up a woman in a bar and she takes you to base housing.
77. You stay there. (refer to #76)
78. You have the misconception that you can kick someone's ass because they're in the Navy.
79. If you've ever suggested that your unit goes on a hump.
80. You've ever gone to a bar or dance club in your blues.
81. You seriously think that your GI Bill will pay for your college education.
82. You've ever slept with a WM.
83. You take your 782 gear camping.
84. You found NCO School motivating.
85. You can be found in 'Shaboom's' or 'Texas Two Step' every weekend.
86. You like 'Tun Tavern' Beer.
87. You have a camouflage comforter on your bed.
88. You keep MREs around just in case you get hungry.
89. You go to the chow hall to meet women.
90. You think people should be court-martialed for running into a building to avoid colors.
91. You've ever had razor burn on your head.
92. You signed the Chesty Puller stamp petition.
93. You've ever used the term 'very well' in normal conversation.
94. You call cadence during sex.
95. You've seen the banana show.
96. You've been to Kin Town aka sin Ville.
97. You know what a buy me drinky is.
98. You've dated a buy me drinky.
99. You've been to the stage.
100. Your favorite place on the weekends is Blue Hawaii.
101. You have a motivated signature in your outlook.
102. You know about TJ.
103. While walking you do facing movements.
104. If you had your hammy smacked by a flip.
105. IF YOU SAY "GOOD TO GO" IN EVERY OTHER SENTENCE.
106. You got a DUI within your first four years of enlistment.
107. You think wearing your jungle/combat boots with regular clothes looks good.
108. You tuck in all your shirts even when you are wearing regular clothes.
109. If you have an EGA on your wallet.
110. You ate the banana.
111. You use your star card to buy beer.
112. You got on the stage.
113. You starch your underwear for a wall-locker inspection.
114. You ever dated any girl from Okinawa.
115. You have sang kareoke at "Mickey's." People on Futenma, you know what i'm talkin about
116. You have a copy of "Full Metal Jacket" in your walllocker.
117. "The Duke" is your mentor.
118. You have ever drilled your friends on your libo time just to get some practice.
119. They know you well at P-52's. (All you KC-130 flyers know what I am talking about)
120. You refer to the middle east as "Going to play in the 'Big Kitty Litter Box/ Sand Box.'"

Yea, there were a few too many Okinawa/Iwakuni references in this little list, but, I'll add a few of my own:

You might be a Marine if:

111. To emphasize your point in conversation you point with your entire right hand - as if in a salute that is stalled - and jab it at them as if it were a weapon! (Which it is!)
PS: (Your thumb Must be flush with your hand!)

112. You tell your children/wife/staff to "Fall in!" when it is time to get ready to leave your location!

113. You tell your children/wife/staff to "Saddle up!" when it is time to leave your location!

114. The worse the crisis is the calmer you become!

115. The more petty the offense the worse the chewing out is!

116. You still call a floor "A Deck" and a ceiling an "Overhead".

117. Your favorite word/phrase to your children (Besides "I love you!") is: "Tough!"

118. You don't allow your kids to bitch about the weather or the chow or the activity! "Every day's a holiday! Every meal's a feast!" (OK. They can bitch - but you don't have to listen to it!)

Semper Fi!

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