Census: Record Number of Women Childless

Yahoo! News ^ | 10/24/2003 | GENARO C. ARMAS

[Hildy]

By choice, I do not have any children. I'm 44 and am perfectly happy and thrilled for my friends who have and are having children. Having children is not a guaranteed joyous experience, as we all know. I like my life, thank you and have no regrets.

[mdittmar]

Do you assume childless people do not care about children?

I think not.

[halfdome]

If she is so miserable because she's not married, or can't find a boyfriend, she's probably got other issues. Getting married rarely solves problems.

[Yossarian]

Would she like to move? The weather's great here, our Executive branch is under new management, and California life's never boring!

[Orangedog]

Right now these decisions are being made for economic or lifestyle reasons. But in the not to distant future, I think that people will avoid having kids to keep the government at all levels out of their lives. As it is right now, just having a kid invites all kinds of harassment from government. If you send your kid to a public school, there are no shortage of "programs" designed to interfere with your rights as a parent, either the ritalin pushers, child abuse nazis, D.A.R.E programs that encourage kids to turn in their parents to the police if they think someone is using drugs. Then if you try to homeschool some districts will take you to court. And that's tame compared to the level of intrusion you'll be subjected to if the marriage goes sour and you get divorced. None if this is going away and it's likely to get even worse in the next few years.

[Pedantic_Lady]

Right now these decisions are being made for economic or lifestyle reasons. But in the not to distant future, I think that people will avoid having kids to keep the government at all levels out of their lives. As it is right now, just having a kid invites all kinds of harassment from government. If you send your kid to a public school, there are no shortage of "programs" designed to interfere with your rights as a parent, either the ritalin pushers, child abuse nazis, D.A.R.E programs that encourage kids to turn in their parents to the police if they think someone is using drugs.

Well...not sure how it works now, but I graduated from high school in 1993 and we didn't have those problems. I don't think people watching out for signs of abuse are necessarily "Nazis." I was sexually assaulted as a child and in the mid-1980s, it was simply not something that was discussed. I didn't tell my parents about it until 1996...after I had a nervous breakdown, mostly caused by keeping it bottled up for twelve years. I think I would be a different person now if teachers had sussed out that something was wrong with me after it happened, but that's just me.

Then if you try to homeschool some districts will take you to court. And that's tame compared to the level of intrusion you'll be subjected to if the marriage goes sour and you get divorced. None if this is going away and it's likely to get even worse in the next few years.

To be fair, a lot of people are not qualified to home-school their children and I don't see anything wrong with keeping track of the home-schooled kids to ensure that they don't lag behind their peers. You hear some success stories, but for every home-schooled kid winning the spelling bee, there's gotta be another one who can barely add and subtract because their parents lack basic numeracy skills.

[yarddog]

Well first of all she doesn't have any trouble finding a boyfriend. She does have trouble keeping them and it is she who drops the boys not vice-versa. She has trouble finding the type she once had her choice of.

As a matter of fact she does have some other problems. She suffers from anxiety and depression and is on medication for it.

[TSgt]

I'll be 27 next Saturday and my wife is 26. We've been married for 5 years and have no desire to have children. Our lives don't permit it now with us both working and going to school full-time not to mention the possibility of my military commitment calling me away at a moments notice.

We barely get to spend time with one another rather than our dog and cat.

I also have reservations about society as a whole. Since it wasn't that long ago that I was a child I know just how difficult it is to grow up these days not to mention what it will be like 10 years from now. Society is as evil as it ever was and things don't appear to be on a positive track.

We may have children and we may not. I don't think an individual is being selfish if they choose not to have children. Maybe they are just the opposite for thinking about that which hasn't been conceived yet…

[hotdogjones]

I remember when I was dating I found that alot of the "Professional type women" where not the type for me to date. They don't know how to cook or clean properly. Had to much baggage with ex-livein boyfriends. I found myself a country girl.

Having children is great. Yes it takes alot of time/money to raise, but they are worth in the long run.

[Alberta's Child]

I left feeling decidedly taken down a a few pegs.

I hope you also left with a new insurance agent. Your insurance agent isn't there to tell you how to live your life -- she's there to fit her product to your needs, not vice versa.

If $70,000 per year isn't enough to live in the area where you live, then it sure as hell isn't enough to buy whatever sh!t she's trying to sell you.

[DumpsterDiver]

If those childless people are happy, and I'm happy, the world's a fine place.

Keep listening to your heart. It sounds to me like you and your family are doing just fine.

[noexcuses]

Hubby and I are from families with 4 children, and both of us have a younger sister in mid 40's who are married with no children.

[Orangedog]

Having children is great. Yes it takes alot of time/money to raise, but they are worth in the long run.

Agreed. I have one of my own and she's the center of my universe. She's a teenager now, so I've been preparing myself for the day when I go from being the "greatest dad in the world" to the a$$hole whose "ruining her life." She hasn't started with the whole boy thing yet. I think all of my talk about boyfriends who don't measure up having their heads cut off and stuck on a pike in the front yard might have worked. ;)

[joedish]

Just wondering if they have a different perspective on the future not if they care about children. With so much history and society's norms based around the raising of children, is it possible these large number of people without that perspective could change the societies evolve. Things like changing the definition of marriage. Historically it is a union made around the raising of a family, now it becomes a union designed around convienience and government benefits. A we want ours perspective vs. we want want is best for our children's future.

[Bob J]

Who would you rather have choose your retirement home when you get that old ? Your flesh and blood or a complete stranger ?

Yes, at least the kids send you a poinsettia for Christmas before they ship you off to the home.

[mvpel]

http://www.nokidding.net/ - The international social club for childfree and childless couples and singles.

[Orangedog]

Sorry to hear about your experiences. I hope you've managed to deal with it since your breakdown.

The ones I were talking about are ones like some friends of mine who had children's services drag them through 10 kinds of hell because the neighbors called the police for spanking their kid for talking back to his mom. Nothing anywhere close to abuse.

[DumpsterDiver]

A we want ours perspective vs. we want want is best for our children's future.

A lot of that depends on the person and not on whether they do or do not have children. I don't have kids and I hate seeing yet another generation being saddled with Social Security and other government claptrap. I also know parents and grandparents who don't think about that at all.