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Who Is The Father? Actual replies from women on welfare forms
Posted on 12/31/2003 1:40:58 PM PST by Hillary's Lovely Legs
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To: BigWaveBetty; Hillary's Lovely Legs; mountaineer; Timeout; ClancyJ; BlessedAmerican; ...
Happy New Year
2
posted on
12/31/2003 1:41:37 PM PST
by
Hillary's Lovely Legs
(I have a plan. I need empty liquor bottles, a vacuum cleaner, and a dead monkey.)
To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
"1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was fathered by [name removed]. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of child B, but I believe that he was conceived on the same night."
If they were fraternal rather than identical twins this is possible.
To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
These are all women in the UK.
4
posted on
12/31/2003 1:44:41 PM PST
by
Alouette
(Proud parent of an IDF recruit!)
To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
These are SO funny! Thanks for the ping and the laughs.
Happy New Year to you!
5
posted on
12/31/2003 1:46:23 PM PST
by
Mama_Bear
(Lori)
To: John Beresford Tipton
I have a pair of cats whose mother was a stray. The humane society insisted that they are brothers, but they they don't look anything alike. I've always wondered if they had different daddies.
6
posted on
12/31/2003 1:47:14 PM PST
by
jaybee
To: Hillary's Lovely Legs; nopardons; dixiechick2000; ILBBACH
ROFLMAO! GREAT POST!
I can't pick a favorite --- they're all too dang hilarious.
7
posted on
12/31/2003 1:47:26 PM PST
by
onyx
(Your secrets are safe with me and all my friends.)
To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
Are they even sure who the mother is?
8
posted on
12/31/2003 1:47:28 PM PST
by
aomagrat
(IYAOYAS)
To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
It either Bill Clinton , Steve Garvey or Jack as in the Box
9
posted on
12/31/2003 1:48:18 PM PST
by
al baby
(Ice cream does not have bones)
To: John Beresford Tipton
If they were fraternal rather than identical twins this is possible.I think the real trick is being sure of the father of one while uncertain of the father of the other...
The children must be very "distinctive."
To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
They were too busy excerising their "right to choose"!Choose between Tom,Dick,Harry,Fred,Peter,Calvin,George,not to mention the rest of the community.
To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
I saw a list of questions and answers of guys going into the service during WW2, here is my favorite question and answer.
Question: What is you church preference?
Answer: Red brick.
12
posted on
12/31/2003 1:50:16 PM PST
by
blam
To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
7. I do not know who the father of my child was as all squaddies look the same to me. I can confirm that he was a Royal Green Jacket. Whew! I wear only Royal Blue!
What's a squaddie?
To: Onelifetogive
"The children must be very 'distinctive.'"
Yes, there have been cases where one is black and one is white, though as Seinfeld teaches us:
"Not that there is anything wrong with that."
To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
One of the funniest things I have read in a long time! What a great way to end the year! Thanks for posting this!
15
posted on
12/31/2003 1:51:51 PM PST
by
ladyinred
(God Bless our Troops!)
To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
Mommy always said I came from Heaven.
16
posted on
12/31/2003 1:52:20 PM PST
by
BigWaveBetty
(HAPPY NEW YEAR!!)
To: Onelifetogive
The Dude: [Looking at a picture of the Little Lebowski Urban Acheivers] And these are uh...
Brandt: Oh, those are Mister Lebowski's children.
The Dude: Different mothers.
Brandt: No...
The Dude: So racially, he's pretty cool?
17
posted on
12/31/2003 1:52:23 PM PST
by
labowski
("The Dude Abideth")
To: Larry Lucido
What is a Squaddie?
Between the security of childhood and the senility of old age.
Is found the fascinating group of humanity called Squaddies.
A squaddie can be found anywhere in love, in bars, in trouble and always in debt. Girls love them, towns tolerate them, hotels hide them and governments support them.
A squaddie is, Laziness with a pack of cards. Bravery with a tattoo. Ruggedness in uniform and defender of the world with a copy of playboy.
He has the brains of a bear, the energy of a sea turtle, and the slyness of a fox. The stories of a sea captain, the sincerity of a liar. The aspirations of a Casanova, and a desire for people to be free.
His interests are, Girls, females, women. And members of the opposite sex. He likes beer, booze, plonk, alcohol, and ale, leave passes and an excuse all duties chit.
He spends his money on Girls, beer, cards, and any that he has left he likes to spend foolishly.
No one else could cram into one packet, food for 24 hours, a packet of crushed cigarettes, and a box of matches. A picture of his girl, receipts for lost equipment, a deck of cards an old leave pass.
18
posted on
12/31/2003 1:53:01 PM PST
by
Hillary's Lovely Legs
(I have a plan. I need empty liquor bottles, a vacuum cleaner, and a dead monkey.)
To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
"Who is my babydaddy?" BUMP.
19
posted on
12/31/2003 1:53:30 PM PST
by
Constitution Day
(Iraqi blogger to President Bush: "The bones in the mass graves salute you, Avenger of the Bones.")
To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
bump
20
posted on
12/31/2003 1:54:59 PM PST
by
VOA
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