Posted on 03/10/2004 7:40:40 AM PST by BenLurkin
LANCASTER - Pain and trauma were constant themes in Helen Carreon's life. In the end, it may have been the pain that killed her. The 30-year-old mother of six was found dead in her Lancaster home on Elm Avenue the morning of Feb. 28, the victim of what appears to be an accidental pain medication overdose.
The last two weeks of Carreon's life were a series of tragedies, beginning with a gunshot wound on Valentine's Day. The bullet, which pierced her leg, was allegedly fired by her jealous boyfriend, Byron Matheu, 25, a parolee and reputed gang member. Three days later authorities say Matheu murdered Carreon's neighbor in front of her children. Within days, Carreon was dead, too, a tragic ending to a life lived the hard way.
Nothing ever had come easy for Carreon. Kicked out of her mother's house at 12 after becoming pregnant, she had six children - all girls - by the time she was 22. She battled substance addiction, poverty, jail time and at least one abusive relationship. The father of her oldest children - ages 18, 14 and 13 - was murdered several years ago in Arizona. Her three youngest children, two 9-year-old twins and a 10-year-old, were living with their father in Riverside at the time of her death. Friends said she missed them terribly and hadn't seen them since Christmas.
Although toxicology results won't be back for several weeks from the coroner's office, Los Angeles County sheriff's investigators suspect medication to numb the pain may have ended her life. A ruling on the death will not be made until all tests are back, Coroner's spokesman David Campbell said.
Those who loved Carreon grieve her loss, while at the same time marveling at her resilience.
"Every time she got knocked down, she would just dust herself off and get back up," said Annette Banks, a close friend. "She was the heart of her family and the strength of her friends. I don't know how she did it."
Despite the problems in her life, Carreon was remembered as a happy person with a contagious laugh who went out of her way to help people, especially young teenagers. She loved to read and was known to take long baths. She couldn't wait to have grandchildren so she could spoil them, Banks said.
Her life was filled with struggles, some of them her own doing, loved ones acknowledge, and sometimes she turned to drugs when the pain overwhelmed her.
"But we loved her for who she was," Banks said.
As a single, struggling mother, Banks said, her friend longed for love and acceptance. She chose the wrong man in Matheu, and that proved to be her downfall, she said.
"It was a bad relationship," Los Angeles County sheriff's homicide detective Brian Steinwand said. "He was abusive to her."
Carreon and Matheu had been dating about 2 years, according to Carreon's oldest daughter, Kat.
"At first he was real nice to us, but then he started hitting my mom and we didn't like him no more," she said.
Matheu didn't live with the family, but he did stay there from time to time, Steinwand said. On Valentine's Day he was at the house when he and Carreon got into an argument and he accused her of cheating on him.
"He apparently pulls out a gun, and the gun goes off," Steinwand said. "She said he didn't mean to shoot her."
The bullet hit her in the leg, but Carreon took care of the wound herself. She told her children she had been playing with a gun and accidently shot herself, Kat said.
"She didn't tell us. If I had known, I would have gone after him with a baseball bat," she said.
Detectives learned of the shooting Feb. 17 while questioning Carreon about her neighbor's murder. They saw bandages on her leg and sent her to the hospital, Steinwand said.
On that day, Matheu was at the house looking for trouble, Steinwand said. He got into a fight with Arthur Morua, a neighbor and a close friend of the family.
"They started fighting, (Matheu) was losing the fight and he got one of his friends to get in there," Steinwand said. "Then, while his friend was kind of holding the guy, he gets up off the ground and shoots him in the head."
Kat and some of the other children witnessed the execution.
"Arthur was like an uncle to me," Kat said. "He always helped us out. He was just like my mom."
Kat and the others cooperated with detectives as witnesses.
"They're good kids," Steinwand said. "I feel for the kids."
Matheu is still at large, but detectives have two alleged accomplices, Richard Garcia, 24, and Rafael Espinoza, 25, in custody. News of their arrests within days of the murder was greeted happily by Carreon and her children, but another tragedy was coming.
The morning of Feb. 28, Carreon's 21-year-old sister Jodi entered Carreon's bedroom and found her lifeless body in her bed.
The family is now reeling with the sudden loss of two loved ones.
"I can't believe that we lost two great people two weeks apart," Kat said, adding that she doesn't know what the family will do next.
Money is tight, and the family doesn't have the funds for a funeral or even day-to-day expenses.
"People tell us to call if there's anything we need help with, so when we need food or help with something, I call them," she said.
Kat, who was not attending high school at the time of her mother's death, had plans of joining the Job Corps. Those plans are now on hold as she and her Aunt Jodi seek custody of her younger siblings.
A donation fund for funeral expenses and daily supplies for the children has been set up under Kat's full name, Kathleen Carreon, at Washington Mutual Bank.
In the meantime, Kat says she will use her mother's strength as an example in the trying times the family now faces.
"Even though my mom was young, she was very, very wise," Kat said. "My mom raised me so well, I think I'm stronger. We can't stop life; we have to continue for our mom."
Great, they can reproduce exponentially.
We could say a prayer for the family.
Lancaster, CA is in the Los Angeles County portion of the High Desert. I lived for years on the San Bernardino County side. I've seen this in my neighborhood, and with my ex's family. I could tell you some stories. Let's just say that society is regressing.
Pregnant at 12 and kicked out of the house, shows what a joke CPS really is. I did the math, she was 12 when she gave birth to her eldest child, who is now 18. An interesting detail is that Helen Carreon's sister Jodi is 21. So 3 years after Helen is kicked out, her mother has another baby. I'd love to know how many babies and fathers are in that part of the family.
It's easy enough for people to moralize and pass judgement on this woman's life. She didn't have a chance. She had what, a 6th grade education? She sure didn't have any role models to help her grow as a productive member of society.
Drug abuse? That part of the world used to be the methamphetamine capitol of America. It still is the drug of choice in those parts. It will mess you up!
I imagine there will be a lot of parking lot car washes out there in the next few weeks. In Victorville I would see them every weekend, trying to raise money for funeral expenses. If my car needed a bath, I'd pull up and give them what I had. Unfortunately, that usually wasn't more than 10 bucks.
The younger children should stay with their father. I don't see any good coming out of their oldest sister and aunt going for custody. They should get liberal visitation, because after all they've just lost their mother.
A reasonable analysis, IMHO.
A reasonable analysis, IMHO.
Haven't you heard that you shouldn't speak ill of the dead?
Her six children had a total of two fathers. The oldest three had one father who was murdered. The younger three had the same father, and live with him. This is according to the original article.
Where does slut come into this?
I agree. Have you seen some of the comments on the Martha Stewart threads? Gee, maybe I'm not as conservative as I should be...
Those people are very self-directed. They have a lot of maturity, discipline, patience, ambition, and responsibilty. These are the kind of people we'd like to have procreating more. Unfortunately, those kind of people usually understand just how much of a burden and responsibility children are, so they put it off until they're ready and have fewer children.
The antithesis of this is that those who are immature, uneducated, undisciplined, irresponsible, unthinking, and living only for today are those who are most likely to have a whole litter of children. They have no reason not to. They don't have ambitious goals that restrain them to more responsible actions. Life holds no hope for them and having children at least gives them a feeling that they're loved. Being irresponsible and undisciplined is the easiest life in the world.
Yeah. I love threads like this. It points out that as a Republican conservative, I'm not just judgemental enough.
I'll assume you are joking. This woman had the worst selection criteria for men possible. One got shot, one shot her, but she considered them both prime father material for her children.
THAT is where SLUT comes from.
No, I am not joking. The deceased was with one man who fathered her first three children. He was murdered. She had three children (two are twins) by another man. She made a really stupid mistake of choosing an abusive man for her bf.
Please enlighten us. Where does the label "slut" come into this? Do you have information that the rest of us don't?
What part of 12 yr old child, don't you understand? Do you have children? Can you imagine having a 12 yr old child that is sexually active? Of course not, and neither can I. I have 4 kids. The adult girls were not allowed to date until they were 16. I keep close tabs on my 2 younger kids to keep them out of trouble.
This woman didn't have that kind of parenting. At best, she was allowed to run the streets. At worst she was a victim of a much older male. After being kicked out of the house, she had no choice but to stay with this male. She had 2 more children by him. Then he was murdered. I'm still not seeing slutty behavior.
Her reputation in high school??? She was in middle school when her mother kicked her out! She was too busy being a child wife and mother to go to school. She was a child who had to depend on this man. If he wants more kids, then she'll have more kids. You just don't get it. You must be extremely fortunate not live in neighborhoods where this sort of thing isn't surprising :-(
So she meets another man and has 3 children by him. For whatever reason, they split up and he keeps the kids. She starts dating, and picks a loser.
If you want to blame someone, or call someone names, call her mother unfit to raise children.
Perhaps you don't understand that having sex at 12 is not normal behavior. Her parents were responsible for keeping her safe. Do we let our toddlers play with matches? Do we let our kindergarteners walk to and from school by themselves? I'm a parent, and this story is apalling to me on several levels.
Something else to think about. If she had the first child at 12 yrs old, it is entirely possible that she was sexually active at...11! Now that spells child abuse.
I've seen young women who certainly could be classified as total sluts. I've seen drug whores, who have 4 kids by 4 different men. Usually you can trace their behavior by their upbringing.
The most disturbing thing about this story, is the response from some of you. Sure, being disgusted by this woman's life is normal, but I'm shocked that people don't look beyond the words and see the real story.
Oh yes, the old liberal line "You're fortunate to be rich". Or as Dick Gephhardt said "Winning life's lottery". Puhleeze. It's called hard work, good decision making, and being responsible.
So she meets another man and has 3 children by him. For whatever reason, they split up and he keeps the kids. She starts dating, and picks a loser.
You mean the first two guys weren't losers? By this time her poor parenting excuse that you claim is no longer a valid excuse. And, in addition, father #2 must have good grounds to keep those 3 kids and not her. Like slutty behavior perhaps?
If you want to blame someone, or call someone names, call her mother unfit to raise children.
Like I said, that may have been a valid excuse for children #1,2,3 but not for children 4,5,6.
I'm a parent, and this story is apalling to me on several levels.
Yet you are an apologist for her on all levels
I've seen young women who certainly could be classified as total sluts. I've seen drug whores, who have 4 kids by 4 different men. Usually you can trace their behavior by their upbringing.
You remind me of apologists for murderers who say that they shouldn't be executed because of a poor childhood and poor parenting.
The most disturbing thing about this story, is the response from some of you.
Yes, especially YOUR response.
She sure didn't have any role models to help her grow as a productive member of society.
Oh really? Let's see, in 1986 when she got pregnant, there already was Margaret Thatcher, Princess Diana, Phyllis Schafly, Betty Friedan, Jane Pauley, Barbara Walters, etc. etc. etc.
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